1. Welcome to Baptist Board, a friendly forum to discuss the Baptist Faith in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to all the features that our community has to offer.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

Experienced Advice:

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by th1bill, Feb 10, 2017.

  1. th1bill

    th1bill Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2009
    Messages:
    1,027
    Likes Received:
    30
    Faith:
    Baptist
    Tips For Student Pilots
    1. Takeoffs are optional. Landings are mandatory.
    2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller.
    3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is dangerous.
    4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.
    5. The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
    6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
    7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.
    8. A "good" landing is one from which you can walk away. A "great" landing is one after which they can use the plane again.
    9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
    10. You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp.
    11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival equals a small probability of survival -- and vice versa.
    12. Never let an airplane take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.
    13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction.
    14. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.
    15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
    16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
    17. Keep looking around. There's always something you've missed.
    18. If all you can see out of the windscreen is ground that's going round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not at all as they should be.
    19. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminum going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.
    20. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, experience usually comes from bad judgment.
    21. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward as much as possible.
    22. There are old pilots and there are bold pilots. There are, however, no old, bold pilots.
    23. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to repeal.
    24. Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of takeoffs you've made.
    25. The three most useless things to a pilot are altitude above you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.
    And a bonus tip:
    Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth repels them.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  2. just-want-peace

    just-want-peace Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2002
    Messages:
    6,769
    Likes Received:
    536
    Faith:
    Baptist
    LOVE THESE!!
    I really appreciate as an aspiring pilot that never got to the solo point.
    Over a several year period I started lessons, only to have to stop for various reasons. I finally came to the conclusion that God did not intend me to fly, so I quit trying.
    Still dream about it though, and will accompany any pilot who wants a little company on a beautiful day!!:D
     
    • Like Like x 2
  3. th1bill

    th1bill Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2009
    Messages:
    1,027
    Likes Received:
    30
    Faith:
    Baptist
    I never tried for my ticket, but I did fly my chopper every time I flew with one pilot, but he never got me below 20 feet at a hover on landing! Get that rascal stopped before it smacks the ground is my thought because take offs and landings are the danger and I like cutting the odds in half.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  4. Rolfe

    Rolfe Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 17, 2014
    Messages:
    6,898
    Likes Received:
    638
    Faith:
    Baptist
    [​IMG]
     
    • Like Like x 2
Loading...