Eye disease

I'm sorry to say I probably take the cake (on this board, presently at least) for eye problems. I was born 3 months premature and only weighed 2 lb. 4 oz (this was back in 1957). I was only given a 1 out of 10 chance of living. I had to spend 3 months in an incubator to get up to 5 lbs. before I could be released. During my time in the incubator I developed "retinopathy of prematurity" or ROP as it's commonly called. It left me blind in my left eye and very nearsighted in my right. Again I was very fortunate as 3 out of 4 babies who developed ROP were left completely blind.

I had to first beat the 1 out of 10 odds, and then the 3 out of 4 odds!

When I was 12, I was struck on the head and got a detached retina in my one good eye. Fortunately it could be repaired through surgery and other than being very nearsighted I had 30 years of good sight. I never could see well enough to have a drivers' license, but it didn't matter. My eyesight was about 20/60 in my good eye, with extremely thick glasses (most recently it was a minus 17 diopter!)

About 9 years ago, something started happening to my sight and I discovered I was getting a cataract in my good eye.

Doctors want to wait a number of years till the cataract gets worse. I finally decided to have the surgery this year. The doctor told me I had about a 3% chance of having complicatons, verses about 1% for someone who had never had any eye problems.

I had the surgery on March 31 of this year. After about one day, I started developing a detached retina and by the second day had lost half the field of vision in my one eye. I was rushed to a retina surgeon and the Lord was with me, the doctor could take me right into surgery immediately.

A detached retina is a medical emergency. If they can't reattach the retina within 2 or 3 days, that part of the retina dies and you lose part of your sight permanently.

In order to reattach the retina, they have to take out the substance (vitreous) that the eye is filled with. They refill the entire eye with a gas bubble which the body absorbs after several weeks and then is displaced with water. While the gas bubble was in my eye, my vision was extremely poor. I literally couldn't see much past 6 or 8 inches away. Unfortunately I bumped my head a few days later which buckled a part of the retina and I had to have another surgery. This time they refilled my eye with a silicone oil. The silicone oil is very dense and heavy and it helps hold the retina against the back of the eye so it can reattach itself. The oil is not absorbed by the body and in most must be removed later by surgery.

I lost quite a bit of my peripheral vision but centrally I could see 20/60 with new glasses and even read a couple of letters on the 20/40 line! I spent about 6 months like that, Fortunately I was able to return to work.

I did have some distortions in my vision, but I was learning to live wuth that. Unfortunately I very lightly bumped my head on something else and that seemed to cause more problems. I went back in on Oct. 8 for a third retina surgery. During the surgery, the surgeon saw the original area that he had repaired in April looked healed. He was originally going to keep the silicone oil in, but he was encouraged by the healing, so he decided to take the oil out and put the gas in for the second time. I went another two weeks seeing poorly. Then suddenly, while the doctor was gone to a conference in California, my vision started going darker. I was sure I was going blind. Turns out my retina was detaching in the center area, the macula.

That is a bad place to have a detached retina. Even if they can repair the macula, there can be a severe, permanent reduction of vision

I had to wait 3 or 4 days for a fourth surgery. The oil went back in and it will have to be left in permanently. My vision is much worse now, I only have about 20/200 vision. Plus, I have very bad vision at night now, I can't go out at night by myself. Thirdly, my eye is staying dialated and does not want to go back down. The doctor cannot guarantee when or if it will ever go back down.

I live by myself (I've never married or had children). I have an older sister (14 years older than me) who is a strong Christian, I stayed with her while recuperating and she drives me to all the surgeries and doctor appointments.

I know that The Lord has blessed me SO MUCH by giving me the eyesight I have had for all of my life. Many, many times on my knees I have thanked him for the sight he has given me. I am still grateful for all the years he has given me, but this year I have had to face the possibility of the one thing I have many times asked him to not allow to happen; losing my sight.

Needless to say, this has by far been the most terrifying, the most difficult, the most despairing year of my life. Should I be brave enough to say this? there have been moments I have wrestled with the idea of ending my life. What stops me? I know I must trust in The Lord above ALL else. I remember that verse from Job: "though He slay me yet I will trust Him". I also do NOT wish to sin against The Lord, I love Him and I have begged Him to not permit me to do anythjing like that! Thirdly, I have members of my family whom I love very much and would not want to hurt them. I can't return pain for the love they have shown to me!

I hope this long, deeply personal post is not too inappropriate.

 

Until recently, the only issue I had was wearing glasses for being near-sighted.

I had to defend myself and my girls from a drunk, and at the time there were other injuries and issues that took precedence, so I didn't realize the serious of the vision issue. I did go in after a few weeks and was told there was bleeding and had an appointment set up to go back, but was unable to make it or afford it at that time.

My It did turn out to be a detached retina, and I had surgery a couple months ago. It seemed to work, but I had an unrelated surgery less than two weeks ago and since then I've noticed an increase in floaters and dark spots, so a call into the doctor is probably warranted.

While I was lucky to still be able to have it worked on, they really do mean it when they tell you to get in there if that's a concern! I knew that, especially when the doctor kept calling me at home to ask if I found a new one where I moved to, but that's life. I risked permanent blindness, but there was no choice. If anyone reading this is told that retinal detachment is a possibility, do whatever you are able to do in order to get it fixed. They aren't kidding...it is EXTREMELY serious!

I'm still working on forgiving the drunk. I'd not have dropped charges if I'd known the extent of the damage and the cost. I don't think about it too much anymore, but occasionally have to fight back visions of how nice it would be to shove the glass whiskey bottle he carries in his coat sleeve right up his nose, then I wonder what Jesus would do, and then I figure maybe he'd rather beat me the guy with a whip....

Anyhoo, that's the eye thing there. One of my daughters was born with a defect that left her legally blind in one eye. We brought her from blindness (for a while all she could see was a sheet of yellow) in it to being able to see shapes and shadows. After a few years we finally found a doctor who could get a reading on that eye, so now she wears contacts and glasses (at the same time) and can see big print now if she concentrates. Which reminds me...I've gotta reorder her contact lenses tomorrow!

 

I have had surgery on both eyes for cataracts (sp?), and my left eye was also operated on for severe distortion. The vision in it was greatly improved. My right eye requires surgery again. The sight in it is so blurry that it is pretty much useless. Even reading glasses don't help with my right eye, and that used to be my GOOD eye.