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Get married?

Discussion in 'Money Talk$' started by fight4christ, Jan 16, 2008.

  1. fight4christ

    fight4christ New Member

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    Alright everyone...I need some real help here...

    I got engaged in May to the girl of my dreams, and we are facing a dilemma.......
    Let me give you some background....

    Me: 22 yrs old...full time student...cant work due to intense school program....2 years to go...


    Her: 21 yrs old same schooling difficulties....but she works just on the weekend as a server..... year and a half till shes done with school and making a steady $50,000...

    I know that there are tons of details necessary to make a good choice but we dont feel like we are supposed to wait till we finish school to get married....so we were thinking about looking into student loans and just paying them off after school.....I heard you get better rates when you're married students...

    our expenses would be...
    rent
    food
    vehicle payments
    insurance (health and auto)
    School

    ....so I guess my question would be ...is it doable?...anyone else here ever in this situation?....how did you do it?

    How would you recommend doing it?
    God bless..and thanks for your help
     
  2. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Take a word from someone who has been there:

    WAIT!!!!

    Student loans are a pain to pay back. They will cause your fledgling marriage untold amounts of stress. Before that even happens, life will get in your way and change your plans. Inflation, rising tuition and living expenses, having to retake a class that is only taught once a year, failed birth control, illness or a host of other life altering events are bound to happen.

    In my case it was the first three plus a weeks hospital stay. I worked, he worked, we both went to school. That lasted till rising interest rates on the student loans (mine, his grandparents paid his tuition) made us understand that economically we were going to suffer if we had loads of them to pay off. I ended up quitting school a year before my graduation date. (yes, there were opportunities later to go back, but the Lord led us elsewhere).

    Still, the student loans I had already acquired were a pain in the rear to pay back. The interest then was between 7 an 9 percent (depending on the year I had signed). Yes, we were able to pay them back over 10 years. But let me tell you, 10 years is a lonng time!

    Ten years after we married we had two kids and a third on the way, plus all the regular bills. Believe me, the money I was paying into those student loans I could have put into a dozen different places.

    NEVER, EVER borrow money when you have any other choice! Take my word on it, marriage can wait. If you love her and she loves you, you'll still feel that way in two years. You education will also benefit without all the distractions that married life brings.

    :flower:
     
  3. TaterTot

    TaterTot Guest

    Just say NO to loans!! lol

    1) What kind of program is so intense you cant work? Surely you could find some time to work a little.

    2) We did not take out loans - his parents paid for his and I worked a couple of jobs and along with my Dad, we got mine paid with no loans. I cannot imagine the financial stress that would ahve been added had we had to pay back student loans. We would have never made it financially. Its hard enough without going into a marriage with debt.

    We have some freinds that did the loan route and got married while still in school. The way they have it budgeted out, they will not be debt free until they are in their 60's.

    Please look for another way.
     
  4. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Well, I guess it just depends.
    You are not bound to give us all the details. But if you are both going to school now, how are you paying for that? Theoretically, if you got married, some expenses would be less because of one place to live, etc.

    Student loans partly depend on the amount and what your major is. $10,000 in loans and a degree and job in a hot field in engineering will usually equal not very much of a problem. $50,000 in loans and a degree in and job teaching grade school will mean severe financial strain.
     
  5. rbell

    rbell Active Member

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    I took 18-21 semester hours, and got a masters degree later on--working 40 hours (sometimes 50) per week.

    Nasty, but it can be done. Maybe there's an instance of school so tough it cannot...but I'm not seeing it.

    Echoing what others said. DON'T do student loans. Why start your married life off with the strain of debt?
     
  6. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    You have all made great points, but sometimes certain majors are that intense. Some capstone projects in the senior year take a great deal of time in various majors.

    I had some student loans. And I did work during the school year and during summers. It was worth having SOME time to do more on campus than just barely go to classes. But I did not have an excessive amount of student loans for my situation.

    Where I have seen people experience the strain is when they come out of school with $30,000 in loans and get a $25,000 job. Those that have $10,000 in loans and start off in a computer job or engineering job at $50,000, not nearly as much strain. And the loan was worth the tradeoff of having more time to do well in school.
    I'm speaking in generalities, of course. Each situation has to be individually evaluated.
     
  7. TomVols

    TomVols New Member

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    I don't know about getting better rates because you are married.
    I took student loans. Yes, I'm still paying on them 20 years later. But was it worth it? Yes. Education is immeasurable in value. I've met folks who arrogantly claim they graduate debt free, yet will honestly tell you they got NOTHING out of their education, save a piece of paper, because they had to work and scrape to get by. I did part of my education the debt free way, and part with loans so I could concentrate more. There is no doubt that the latter benefitted me more than the former.

    Without knowing your circumstances, I'd advise waiting on marriage until graduation. The stress of a marriage on your studies and your studies on a marriage is just one you don't need. Plus, there are other things to pay for than just books and tuition.
     
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