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Featured Having a opposite-sex Friend if you are Married

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by evangelist6589, Jun 1, 2015.

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  1. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    Biblical or not if NOTHING is going on? I imagine certain activities would be out of the question such as spending time alone, calling, and possibly texting. But talking would be okay if in person and with others, etc..

    A gal at work I want to lead to Christ but not sure how. I am her friend. Perhaps I can offer to pay for her and her husband going out to dinner perhaps that may be a way to give a gospel presentation and draw them closer to salvation. What say you? How should I do this?
     
    #1 evangelist6589, Jun 1, 2015
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 2, 2015
  2. blessedwife318

    blessedwife318 Well-Known Member
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    Since she is married and you are married, this is dangerous ground. My suggestion would be to invite them out as a couple with you and your wife, and you focus you attention on the husband, while you wife talks to her. Become couple friends with them, but you should not zero in on the wife, but you could instead zero in on her husband.
     
  3. Rolfe

    Rolfe Well-Known Member
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    Good post.
     
  4. padredurand

    padredurand Well-Known Member
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    Thread title: Having a opposite sex fiend if you are married

    From the dictionary:

    Not interested in chasing any rabbits but you might want to get that thread title fixed.
     
  5. Don

    Don Well-Known Member
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    Oh.

    OH. "Friend," not "fiend."

    That makes a lot more sense, in context of the actual OP.
     
  6. Don

    Don Well-Known Member
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    By the way: BlessedWife's post is ABSOLUTELY spot-on. I once witnessed to a young lady, and continued to disciple her after she professed salvation. Then someone brought it to my attention that maybe she was being a little too friendly, which I blew off because I ain't no Tom Cruise or Robert DeNiro. Then at one point, where she wanted to talk to me about something, I mentioned having my wife there with us; and she balked. Then she wanted to have me listen to a song out in the car, and didn't understand why I felt it was necessary to leave a car door open (ensuring the interior light was on). Then my wife mentioned something about the situation was getting fishy, so I started refusing to talk to her without someone else present. Shortly after that, she left the church and jumped in with the Lutherans.

    Be careful, John. 1 Thess 5:22.
     
  7. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    Good plan. But what if my wife does not want to go? Then I do the evangelism myself? Note I won't go to the dinner table attempting to convert them, just make friends, get to know them better and so forth.
     
  8. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    I will. Thanks.
     
  9. Tom Bryant

    Tom Bryant Active Member

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    Your wife needs to go so it can be a natural kind of conversation. It will look like a "sales pitch" if it's just you and them.
     
  10. Iconoclast

    Iconoclast Well-Known Member
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    :applause::applause::
     
  11. kyredneck

    kyredneck Well-Known Member
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    ....and it's not just fiend, it's sex fiend.... he'd better run for the hills.
     
  12. wpe3bql

    wpe3bql Member

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    I had a uncle whose surname was Hill.

    Based on that, I don't think the aforementioned fiend needs to pursue the Hill's.

    He was a marksman with a double-barreled shot gun AND piloted his own Piper [not John] Cub.

    Said fiend could neither run nor hide from Uncle Walt.
     
  13. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    And you'd best get quality time in with a Rabbit.
     
  14. Iconoclast

    Iconoclast Well-Known Member
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    Sounds like he better avoid this person altogether....:confused::confused:
     
  15. Thousand Hills

    Thousand Hills Active Member

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    I agree.

    Evan, I've read enough of your threads here and everywhere else and just want to cut to the point. We all realize your zeal for the lost, that is great. But, I think you need to steer clear of trying to personally evangelize this particular co-worker. Pray for her, pray for her husband, live out your holy calling at work day to day and be a witness to her and other co-workers in that way. I say this because I get the sense that you are probably not mature enough to handle this situation if it doesn't go the way that you expect. I also get the sense that your still looking for something yourself. You seek it here in online communities, yet get upset when someone disagrees with you. Christ is enough, let him be sufficient. He has given you a wife and a step-son, focus your efforts on them, cultivate your relationships there (you've only been married for a couple years right?) This whole scenario has trainwreck written all over it IMO. Stay away, take care of business at home.
     
  16. salzer mtn

    salzer mtn Well-Known Member

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    Evan do as you please, I know you will anyway.
     
  17. Dr. Bob

    Dr. Bob Administrator
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    I fixed the title.

    Even the most pure heart/motive (to see co-worker come to Christ) can lead to sexual tension when it is male/female.

    Feel free to share the Gospel, perhaps give a short pamphlet, etc, and express spiritual concern. But NEVER go beyond that into one-on-one "counsel", deep talks, time alone, focus, etc. Trust me (and trust the Word that warns about putting yourself in such situations)
     
  18. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    Deep talks..... Hmm... I have never been alone with her but we did have deep talks. Hmm.. This makes me think.

    My evangelism book says to evangelize women and do whatever necessary but perhaps the author is blind in this area. Nope this was not a Comfort book. The author boasted of a time he evangelized a prostitute in her car.
     
    #18 evangelist6589, Jun 2, 2015
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  19. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589 Well-Known Member
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    Not really.
     
  20. Rolfe

    Rolfe Well-Known Member
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    I would consider this to be very suspect.
     
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