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The Future of this Christian

Discussion in 'Free-For-All Archives' started by 3AngelsMom, Jul 22, 2003.

  1. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    What was still legal? Getting married? It's still legal now too, even for as young as 14. Always has been.
    defensive, becasue you have attacked me, without provacation.
    And for 5 months oyur children won't have a mother,and oyur husband won't have a wife.
    Thats called abandonment.

    Since you have no children of your own I don't expect you to know anything about kids. Kids need their real mother, not some substute who knows nothing about kids.
     
  2. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Uh, maybe in Alabama, but in the real world, CHILDREN are not allowed to marry, without parental consent until they are 18. So that is what I am referring to.
    Do you think playing martry and being whiney is going to get you anywhere? You started this line of attack, when you opened your mouth in judgment towards me. Again, the age old proverb comes into play. Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
    No that is called education. Nothing you can say will make me feel guilty for doing what my husband is already in support of!
    Yeah, stupid me, I forgot, the opening of the matrix is what makes your brain know how to raise kids. All those stupid women who adopt are at a loss as well according to your demented standards.
    Yeah, these kids need thier drug addict, abusive, adulterous, neglectful mother who abandoned them to take away someone elses husband when the youngest was only 9 months old! Boy you have it all figured out don't you?

    Anyone can become a mother, all that takes is the union of a sperm and an egg, hey even YOU can do that! Whoo Hoo for you! It takes a whole lot more than that to be a Mom.

    There's a difference between sustaining life for 18 years and providing an enjoyable childhood for a child.

    Before I met my husband I had already taken 2 years of child psychology at an Christian college. I am the oldest of 4 girls, all of which I helped to nurture and raise. I read James Dobsons 'Parenting isn't for Cowards', and 'The Strong Willed Child', 'Raising Sons and Loving it!' by Gary and Carrie Oliver, 'Making Love last forever' by Gary Smalley, 'The Five Love Languages' by Gary Chapman, and 'The Power of a Praying Wife' by Stormie Omartian. ALL before I endevoured to raise 3 children who have such special needs. On top of all that, at that time in my life I had already read the Bible 3 times.

    So your little theory of a woman not knowing how to raise kids just because she didn't go through a pregnancy is just about the most illogical summation I have ever heard.

    I've been told by every person that has ever met these kids that they are the most well behaved, loving and Godly children that they have EVER met. Most of the time that is coming from OLD people who have SEEN lots of kids.

    My oldest, who is 8 now, entered the first grade at a 5th grade reading level after being homeschooled BY ME for Kindergarten.

    80% of that, at least, is from MY influence on these children. So once again, you have no idea what you are talking about.

    These kids have integrity, compassion, morals, and logic.

    That's doesn't come from 'birth'.

    Ta.
     
  3. Eladar

    Eladar New Member

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    The fact is that you find a job that does not require being away from your family for so long.

    The fact is that it probably wouldn't pay as well.

    In short, you are trading your time with your family for money. There is no getting around it. But hey, that is what society says is the right thing to do.

    One other thing, don't kid yourself, you won't be quitting this job when your husband gets a better job.
     
  4. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Actually, Kelly, Massachusetts allows girls to marry at 12 and boys at 14 if their parents will sign. California has no age limit with parental consent. Almost all states have a stipulation that age is no concern if the girl is pregnant.

    That being said, my children who are married have married late. Our son was 28 and has been married 4 1/2 years. Our daughter who is your age was 25. Our son who is 26 is single. The 8 year old has proposed to our deacon's daughter but she turned him down. ;)

    Here's a link with that state info.
    http://www.law.cornell.edu/topics/Table_Marriage.htm

    I married two months before my 20th birthday and had my first child 9 months later. He's 32 now. Also, our 4th child is adopted. I'm from Alabama originally and I attended Bessie Tift Baptist Women's College and took courses 2 summers in a row at Moody Bible in Chicago.

    [​IMG]
    Diane
     
  5. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Any suggestions? I have an incomplete teaching degree, and military experience. We need $2000 more a month than we are making right now just for bills, and medical benifits for our entire family, and STILL have $2000 more a month left over. AND an additional $1000 or so for a car for me, so I can go to work, and the insurance, and child care for the first couple of hours of the day. Let me know if you have a solution.

    Then it won't work.

    Not exactly. I am trading a short period of time with my family to create a career that will bring us out of debt and into financial security. Once the training is over, I will work regular hours. The man I met that was an agent told me that he has worked from 7 am to 5 pm m-f ever since he joined.

    I'm not kidding myself. I never said I was going to quit once he was licenced. He plans to start his own business once he is licenced, and he will NEED me to have a steady job in order for him to do that.

    What do YOU (or your husband) do for a living? Do you (or him) make money? Do you think it is a sin for you (or him)to make money? Do you pay your bills on time every month, and have money for food? (are you a man or a woman?)

    This isn't a difficult concept. Why is this so strange to people?

    Here's a real simple run down.

    Ex 20:8. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
    9. Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work:
    10. But the seventh day is the sabbath of the Lord thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates:
    11. For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the Lord blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it.

    2 Thess 3:10. For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should eat.

    Notice it said ANY, not just MEN.

    You'd think that people would consider it a noble thing that a woman is willing to help her husband, but yet strangly enough, the most opposition I have gotten is from those who call themselves Christians.

    Prov 13: 4. The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat.

    If we live in poverty all our lives, and never have a chance to save, or be free from debt, what will we be able to do for our children when they want to go to college? Or is it a sin to want to go to college too?

    Prov 13: 22. A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
    23. Much food is in the tillage of the poor: but there is that is destroyed for want of judgment.
    24. He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
    25. The righteous eateth to the satisfying of his soul: but the belly of the wicked shall want.

    God's Blessings be upon you and yours.
    -Kelly
     
  6. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Oh, I know that there are states that allow children to marry, but like you said, it is only with parental consent. It didn't used to be. If I am not mistaken it has only been in the past 20 years or so that they even made a 'consent' law for those under 18. Various states had their own legal age of consent for marriage, but NOW by federal law you must be 18 OR have parental consent.

    You could be my mom. ;)

    Old Lady! :eek: :D

    My Mom is 52, and she is 5'9' size 12 and a HOT MAMA!! She's red head though, we still don't know where I get my blonde hair from! [​IMG]

    I hope these boys wait to get married too. The longer I can live without being someone's 'mother in law' the better!!! Although I do want to see grandkids, I would like to see them all educated and stable before they marry.

    I loved taking child psychology in school. It was so interesting to learn about the personality types and how birth order comes into play. Did you learn about that stuff at your school?

    God Bless,
    Kelly
     
  7. Eladar

    Eladar New Member

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    Many times you can get an emergency teaching certificate which will allow you to teach while you are taking classes to complete your degree. You'd be the cheapest teacher a district could hire, which would give you a leg up if a position opened.

    How about moving to a different state where it isn't quite as expensive to live?

    Good luck with that. Perhaps your husband can get a job with you.
    I am the husband. ;)

    I'm a teacher. My wife stays at home, but did pick up a part time job for a few months. She worked from 3:30 to about 8:00. Now she stays at home. Our son will be 6 in a couple of weeks and our daughter is 3. We plan to home school our kids.

    We make ends meet on just under $2000 per month.
     
  8. Wisdom Seeker

    Wisdom Seeker New Member

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    So, what are we talking about here? The opening post is asking for prayer. But I see that the conversation has turned in another direction. Is everyone keeping in line with B.B. posting rules 1 and 2? [​IMG]
     
  9. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    LOL.. Yes, I sure could be your mom but I'm only 5'2" and 114 lbs. A strong wind would blow me down. Go figure tho, my 26 year old son is 6' tall and our 8 year old is to my shoulder. Our oldest son is only 5'5" and our daughter is smaller than me! Our daughter has red hair!
    http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-7/265209/ErinwithEden.jpg

    I took psychology at Bessie Tift. I was in pre nursing but met my husband and left school to marry.

    Diane
     
  10. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Laurenda, that's what I said.
    The web site said no age limit WITH parental consent. I provided the link above. [​IMG]
    http://www.law.cornell.edu/topics/Table_Marriage.htm


    It's from the Law School at Cornell University.
    Diane
     
  11. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Many times you can get an emergency teaching certificate which will allow you to teach while you are taking classes to complete your degree. You'd be the cheapest teacher a district could hire, which would give you a leg up if a position opened. </font>[/QUOTE]California state school licencening board required that you already have a bachelors degree before you are even considered for licensing. Not everyone who applies even gets one. :rolleyes:

    Moving costs money too. If we were to try to move right now, we would have to pay an extra month on our rent to get out of the lease without getting 'blacklisted' by the apartment complex. We need to stay here, for his work. This is the most he can make for his trade anywhere in the continental US. Only Alaska pays more. That would cost LOADS to have to move THERE!!

    He has actually considered it. Once I get back from academy, and see how it goes, he just might. But what he really wants to do is get his license and start his own business, here in California.

    I thought so.

    That's interesting that you are a teacher, but yet are choosing to home school. You must be a public school teacher ;) I chose to homeschool our 8 year old because he was really messed up psychologically when I first married my husband. He was the one most effected by the neglect and abandonment. He is doing great now! I was going to homeschool all 3 of them, but it proved to be just too much. They all wanted me to sit right with them the whole time they were working, and if I walked off to focus on one of the other kids or to change the laundry or something, they would daze off and not work. So formal school is the best for them, for now. I was homeschooled for the 3-6 grade, but I am a self starter and very independent, so it was a good thing for me. They need more structure.

    Yeah, when we were living in LA (the state) we were living on just over that, but the economy in LA got really bad and the only way for my husband to get work was to leave us there for months at a time to work out of state. It was really hard. We did that for the first year of our marriage. I felt like a single mom. :( We decided to move to where we new there was a lot of construction going on, so here we are in Califonia!

    The rent is really the only thing that is that much of a difference. If we were able to buy a house here (we are still trying to sell our house back in AR) we wouldn't have such a problem, but with two house notes we wouldn't be able to. That is even if a bank would loan us the money!

    God has a plan. We are seeking it!

    God Bless,
    Kelly
     
  12. Eladar

    Eladar New Member

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    Perhaps you husband really needs to look at putting off his dream for a few more years. [​IMG]
     
  13. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Kelly, you've mentioned your testimony but I didn't see it. Do you remember the thread? I'd love to read it!

    Thanks!
    Diane
     
  14. Eladar

    Eladar New Member

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    I really hate this edit time limit thing!
     
  15. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Cute baby!

    My dad is 6'3" my brother is 6'7" I am 5'10" my 20 year old sister is 5'11" and my 17 year old sister is already 5'11 1/2" my youngest sister is 12 and she is already 5'7" [​IMG] We are tall people. My oldest is only 8 and he is already 4'2". My husband is only 6'1"!!!

    You are a shorty! I could use your head as an arm rest!!! [​IMG]

    You only weigh 114??? WOW. I weigh somewhere in the neighborhood of the 150's. I'm not sure. I'm a 7. I don't like to weigh myself. It is depressing. I have a huge frame, big bones and all, so even if I am thin, I weigh a bunch. I go by size.

    Here is a pic of my husband, and I with my Mom and Dad, from our wedding.

    My hair is down to the middle of my back now.

    http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Jul/20037293993416831104903.jpg

    And one of my sisters and the boys. That was 3 years ago, so they are ALL bigger now! Even Kris. He went through his last growth spurt after we were married.

    http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Jul/20037294173805374129316.jpg

    God Bless,
    Kelly
     
  16. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    Why? The longer we wait to fix the problem, the worse our credit will get, and the worse the debt will get (mounting late fees and interest).

    This has to stop!

    Did you go to college to be a teacher? Why didn't you stop in the middle of your dream and work?

    There's nothing wrong with him getting a license (contractors) and starting his own business. He will be able to make his own hours, and make more money than he is now.

    Do you ever have trouble with your plumbing? What if every man who ever 'dreamed' of being a plumber DID NOT do it? Who would fix your plumbing?

    God Bless,
    Kelly
     
  17. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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    I couldn't find it in the archives, so I will PM it to you. I saved it.
    -Kelly
     
  18. 3AngelsMom

    3AngelsMom <img src =/3mom.jpg>

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  19. Wisdom Seeker

    Wisdom Seeker New Member

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    The web site said no age limit WITH parental consent. I provided the link above. [​IMG]
    </font>[/QUOTE]I know. I thought I would throw you for a loop by agreeing with you for a change. :D

    I would like to add though in this neck of the woods underage marriages are seldom more than a year or two below the age limit. And are not common at all. Most people wait until their in their late 20's...and that is even considered young here.

    I wonder if waiting to get married is more commonplace in the more metropolitan areas like California and New York. Than say it is in the South. I mean no offense to anyone by wondering about this, but I have heard the jokes as I'm sure you have too. I never thought any of them were true....Do people in the South commonly get married before they are adults?

    So what is this subject about? This topic is all over the place. [​IMG]
     
  20. Wisdom Seeker

    Wisdom Seeker New Member

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    Oh my goodness Kelly, you look just like my cousin Cathy. [​IMG]
     
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