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The Yuppie and The Cowboy

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by Thousand Hills, Feb 29, 2012.

  1. Thousand Hills

    Thousand Hills Active Member

    Oct 3, 2010
    Likes Received:
    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture in South
    Dakota when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
    sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I
    tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you
    give me a calf?"

    Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully
    grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it
    to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
    Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his
    location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area
    in an ultra-high-resoluti on photo. The young man then opens the digital
    photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in
    Hamburg, Germany.

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has
    been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database
    through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry
    and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
    miniaturized HP LaserJet printer turns to the cowboy and says, "You have
    exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with
    amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then Bud the Cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly
    what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says,"Okay, why not?"

    "You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even
    though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
    knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of
    equipment trying to show me how much smarter you are than me;
    and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living –
    or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep.

    Now give me back my dog.