Tipping your Pastor or Teacher

That is an issue that should be taken up in the body. You as an individual have no right to make individual judgments other than leaving the church.

But you have not offered him constructive criticism, at least in this forum. You publicly bullied your pastor. Have you talked to him directly about it? What was his response?

 

Hi Larry. You said; "That is an issue that should be taken up in the body. You as an individual have no right to make individual judgments other than leaving the church." I agree about the body to a degree. But I disagree with the idea that individuals have "no right" to make individual judgment. Individuals have every right to confront a pastor individually when they are to be blamed just as Paul had every right to confront Peter individually (Gal. 2: 11).

In my view, pastors have no pre-eminence over any other congregation member. If I felt otherwise I would fellowship in the Roman Catholic Church not a Baptist one.

You said; "Have you talked to him directly about it? What was his response?" I have. So have others. His response has been fairly "boiler plate," though polite, though nothing changes. I've been leaning in the direction of finding a new church for awhile now. I have not done so as yet due to the exhortation of some and the natural tendency to avoid leaving behind friendships that have developed over many years of fellowship. Thanks Larry. latterrain77

 

Why must you assume the worst about people's motives??

Because the school of life experiences taught me well on that. Years ago I might have made a C in its required coursework, but now I've brought it up to an A.

Have you ever done anything for someone simply to be a blessing to them and an encouragement?

Yup.

If you have, then you can understand why some people might do something for their pastor

They might do it for the reason you previously stated, but I would put no trust in that to be the case, including if that person was myself.

(in addition to being obedient to Scripture). If you haven't, then you are living in sin and need to repent and start doing things simply to be a blessing to people.

If I get your drift, you are claiming that people who don't tip their pastor are "living in sin." The only thing to say to that which I haven't already said is to throw your own words back at you... 'Have you ever done anything for someone simply to be a blessing to them and an encouragement?' Do you do things to be a 'blessing' to people, or do you do it for "good things" in return, like meals, mechanical work, and vacations for some you mentioned?

 

I'm gonna tell ya'll about a Pastor I love, though he is no longer a Pastor, though he was one for over 50 years.

He prepared 2 sermons per Sunday, plus a Sunday School lesson for the Adult Class.

He prepared a Bible study for every Weds. night.

He held office hours Tuesday through Friday at the church study. (Mondays and Saturdays were supposed to be his days off.)

He was present for every meeting or event that happened at the church, even if he was not directly involved.

He directed VBS every summer.

He was on-call 24/7. Meaning if someone was sick or dying or needed counseling, they would call, any hour of the day or night.

He was the Pastor, so that meant, he had to attend every graduation or special event for any member, and provide a gift, too.

He was the Pastor, so that meant when a member of a church member's family died, he had to go comfort the bereaved, on-call 24/7.

He was the Pastor, so he performed the weddings and funerals of members and loved ones of members.

There was a monthly Board meeting for the Deacons.

There was a monthly Board meeting for the Trustees.

There was choir practice, too.

Since he had a beautiful voice, he was on-call to provide special music for the services if there was no other special music lined up.

Every Winter, it was this Pastor who shoveled the walkways so people would not slip and fall when they came to church - on Sundays, on Weds., and for all events at the church.

Oh, and many, many times, this pastor would be the one cutting the grass at the church on Saturday so it would look nice for Sunday.


In his younger years, he was head of the Youth Group, too, driving the bus to roller skating parties, etc.

He also chauffered the youngsters to summer camp.

When something broke at the church, he fixed it. In fact, he even built a church from breaking the ground on up many years ago. He wired, plumbed, and carpentered. He even put carpet and tile, mended, fixed, whatever needed done.

He filled the baptistry for baptismal services.

And turned up the heat so the church would be warm when people arrived for services.

He was always the first to arrive at church before anyone else did.

Repairs? He did them. Setting up chairs & tables when needed, he did it. Keeping the church bus going, he did it. Changing a tire in the parking lot for someone? He did it.

Did I forget anything?

Oh, yes, he kept everything fixed up around the old parsonage, too.

If a stranger came through town and needed some money or a meal, this Pastor took care of it - out of his own pocket.

Widows needing some handyman work done, leaky faucet, etc., this Pastor did it & never took any pay.

Did I mention all the hours spent doing hospital visits?

And visits to the old folks' homes?

And the jail ministry?

Or the Battered Women's Shelters?

Or the weekly Thursday night visitation?

Did I mention the church picnics he coordinated and played softball with the young people, or horseshoes?

Did I mention, he was the one everyone turned to for everything through several pastorates and for over 50 years?

Did I mention that sometimes things got so tight, he had to take a second job to make ends meet to feed his family of 4 children? And that his wife was the church pianist and/or organist and sometimes choir director, too, and even a Sunday School teacher, and never received one thin dime through all those years & through several pastorates?

Did I mention that pastors & their families are subject to very much criticism and are supposed to be perfect, too? And that everyone is supposed to be pleased every time and all the time?

Did I mention that even the smallest of gifts are appreciated by a Pastor & his family?

Did I mention that I miss that old Pastor who loved the Lord with all his heart and served Him for over 50 years and that the best Pastor in the whole wide world ended up being my Dad?

He's with the Lord now. And I know he's heard, "well done, thou good and faithful servant."

I've listed the above from a first hand experience of being a PK.

If you love your pastor, you will give those extras out of gratitude for all he is and all he does. Because unless you have lived with a Pastor 24/7, you have no idea the sacrifices your Pastor makes.

So TIP. And be generous about it, too. And throw in something extra for his wife. Because his wife usually shares everything in the ministry with him, in one way or another, even if it's behind the scenes.

 

Hey, SheEagle! My feathered cousin!!

Thanks!!

Brother David

 

You know, in addition to money, a kind word goes a long way, too. Take the time to tell your pastor (and other church workers) how much you appreciate what they do.

As can be seen on this board, it's far more common to either question or complain about something. Frustration is a great motivator. I'm sure the pastor has heard from almost everyone who has complaints.

Make his day by letting him know when he's preached something that really moved you. Let him know that his efforts haven't fallen on deaf ears.

 

But the school of life is not the final judge. The school of hte Bible is and on that regard you seem to be failing.

You didn't get my drift because you didn't read it right. The "living in sin" was failing to do good things for other people including encouraging words and the like.

Yes. Regularly ... Usually for people who cannot do anything for me in return. The people who can do stuff for me in return don't want me to do stuff for them. The most I can do for them is offer kind words of thanks, but I know of one person who hates thank you notes. They get mad if I send them one.

I never do anything with the idea of receiving something for it. I do it to encourage and help others. As I said, the people that do stuff for me don't need me to do stuff for them. They wouldn't let me.

 

I think Alcott has just simply had a bad luck of the draw with pastors. This thread has gotten way off topic at this point. The majority of people here believe that most pastors are good people contrary to Alcotts opinions. I will say this. I have been close to several people who decided to go into the ministry and went to bible college. Of those about 40% were people who could be refferred to as slothful when it came to putting in a good days work. And while I believe that someone fitting that description probably wouldn't last very long in a real ministry, some may have found their niche and held on representing that faction that Alcott refers to. I am no stranger to hard work, but I want to get compensated for what I do. That is why I did not go to school to be an educator, police officer, social worker, fireman, or feel that I am called into serving as a pastor. Many peole could have went to bible college expecting to kick back and get by without having to do much in life when they were given their own church. I know many pastors that have to hold down a full time job in addition to their pastor's duties. This in itself overwhelmingly cuts into the time that they could be spending in the ministry.

 

Sure good teachers should get tips, especially people who post interesting posts! For those who wish to send me their tips, email me for directions . . .