Unity...

Was forwarded this anecdote today...

Read and chuckle...

Subject: Baptist unity at its best

I was walking across a bridge recently. I spied this fellow who looked like
he was ready to jump off. So, I thought I'd try to stall him until the
authorities showed up. "Don't jump!" I said. "Why not?" he said. "Nobody
loves me."

"God loves you," I said. "You believe in God, don't you?"

"Yes, I believe in God," he said.

"Good," I said. "Are you Christian or Jewish?"

"Christian," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Protestant or Catholic?"

"Neither," he said.

"What then?" I said.

"Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Independent Baptist or Southern Baptist?"

"Independent Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "New Evangelical/Moderate Independent Baptist or
Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"Conservative Independent Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist or
Lose-Your-Salvation Armenian Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative
Independent Baptist or Historical Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative
Independent Baptist?"

"Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent
Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Against Women in Ministry Dispensational Premillennial
Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist or For Women in Ministry
Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"Against Women in Ministry Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic
Conservative Independent Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Unashamed Fundamentalist Against Women in Ministry
Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist
or Strict Separation of Church and State Against Women in Ministry
Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"Unashamed Fundamentalist Against Women in Ministry Dispensational
Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "Pro-Disney Boycott Pro-Life Unashamed Fundamentalist
Against Women in Ministry Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic
Conservative Independent Baptist or Anti-Disney Boycott Pro-Choice
Unashamed Fundamentalist Against Women in Ministry Dispensational
Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"Pro-Disney Boycott Pro-Life Unashamed Fundamentalist Against Women in
Ministry Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent
Baptist," he said.

"Me, too!" I said. "KJV Only Pro-Disney Boycott Pro-Life Unashamed
Fundamentalist Against Women in Ministry Dispensational Premillennial
Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist or Modern Versions Pro-Disney
Boycott Pro-Life Unashamed Fundamentalist Against Women in Ministry
Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic Conservative Independent Baptist?"

"MODERN VERSIONS Pro-Disney Boycott Pro-Life Unashamed Fundamentalist
Against Women in Ministry Dispensational Premillennial Calvinistic
Conservative Independent Baptist" he said.

"Auugghh!!! You heretic! What is this world coming to?" I said. And then I
pushed him over.