What is the thought behind policies like this?

Wrong. When kids are taught to love God, they learn to love God. When they are taught to follow rules like robots they learn to earn God's love instead of understanding He loves them already. I'm living proof of this. Not sure how you were raised, probably differently, but this is what I learned by following rules.

Wearing skirts, keeping one's hair short or long, wearing a certain school uniform, or socks with cuffs does not teach anybody to love God. It may teach them to respect authority (or despise it) and it may teach them to obey their parents and teachers. I've never seen a school dress code make anybody love God.

Why is it that when someone questions the rules, they get accused of complaining or rebellion? Why can't legalists just give a straight answer, that they think their personal preference is more godly than other people's?

 

Proper obedience is always out of love for God. And love for God always obeys proper authority, regardless of whether or not one likes the rules.

I have never seen anyone say it does.

Because sometimes they are complaining or rebellious? I think everyone agrees that there are proper ways and proper times to question rules. I grew up in a very strict place that most people would consider "legalistic." It wasn't, but it sure fits the mold of "legalism" that people like to hang on others. No pants on women, no shorts on men (unless at the gym), nothing but classical or traditional Christian music, short hair, etc. It didn't make me rebel. Today, I reject most of that. As a pastor, I wear shorts to the office. I wear jeans to preach in occasionally. I listen to a variety of music, etc.

You see, rules don't make people rebellious. God changes the heart from being rebellious. Rules simply reveal what is already there.

I am uncomfortable with this blame game of "legalism." Let's put the blame where Jesus does ... on our sinful hearts, not our parents or our pastors.

I think they usually do. They believe that their application of the Bible is what God has said. I have never heard one not give a straight answer.

 

Having taught in a private school, I'm sure the dress code rules have been over developed through knee jerk reactions to "but that's not written down anywhere!" And even with rules in place, I've seen quite a few kids come to class dressed terribly inappropriately and the parents really didn't seem to understand why or expressed that was a battle they just weren't willing to fight.

As for the admissions policies, as has been stated, they may be ill equipped and I'd rather they said that than accept children they are not prepared to teach. Also, this school may have been started by people who had bad experiences with mainstreaming.

I generally think that less is better, but I've seen times when I was glad something obscure was written down. Catch 22 I suppose.

 

ANy institution has the right to make whatever rules, dress code, etc. that they want to make. Rules do not create rebellion. As Larry has so aptly stated, all sin comes from the heart. I King 1:6 would seem to indicate just the opposite. Adonijah rebelled because David had no rules for him.

Why are kids accused of being ungodly if the rebel against rules they consider wrong, unfair, etc? Because they are acting in an ungodly way. God puts authority in our lives and commands us to obey. If all of us only have to follow rules we agree with in all of our authority structures, then there really is no such thing as authority.

The fact that abcgrad94 learned a false view of God wasn't because of the rules. It was because she didn't understand the biblical principle of authority and obedience.

 

I will agree with you on that because some children are raised or have been raised by parents who acted more like a dictator than a parent. They teach loving God is only obeying the parent's rules. They are not taught how to love just follow the rules. There are some who believe that if you don't follow what God says, then He is going to "zap" you. (lack of better terminology).

I think abcgrad94 is coming from the side that being under a dictatorship for parents (you believe this way because I am the head of this house) without letting her become an individual will cause children to rebel.

Yes, she probably didn't understand because she probably was never taught.

 

Some people live thru periods of access with harsh parents or leaders and then later become overly sensitive to any authority. There motivation is not rebellion, they just have not gotten over their past.

 

Partly true. Don't you think that Satan would bring up those types of situation back to your remembrance to try to cause you to fall spiritually?

 

Ouch! :thumbs:

 

My $0.02:

Make sure your standards are clearly set forth in the rules...so that reasonable folks, exercising reasonable effort, are able to understand them.

I think it is possible to set forth standards, but do so simply. One cannot cover every single possible contingency.

For instance: at our summer camps, our dress code is summarized as "clean, neat, and modest." If a student's dress does not meet that standard, we ask them to change. I've seen other camp dress codes that go on for pages. And to be honest, I think we've had less issues than they have: One, because we can accomplish the same goal with less confusion and verbage; two, because many in our day go straight for the exception: "Well, you say that this isn't allowed...but how about that?" By keeping things clear, yet simple, this heads off many of those encounters.

Also, simplicity helps with dress codes since the stuff you prohibit is really only a problem for a year or so....and then when it comes back when your kids go to that school.

With regards to the disabilities...I would have to know more before making a comment. Is it an issue of accessibility (in a physical sense)? Is it a "we're not qualified to handle this right now" kind of approach? Or is it something else?

Like I say...not enough info on that issue for me to comment intelligently.

 

A Christian school supposedly embodies Christian principles. Christian principles should translate into Christlike actions. I think "clean, neat, and modest" (especially the last) is a reflection of values the school wishes to embody. I would assert a Christian school should have a dress code that embodies such ideals. It doesn't have to be ten pages, or name every item worn by humans. I think what I described covers the bases.

Now...a dress code and a uniform are two totally different matters. I was referring to the former. If I were running a Christian school, I'm not sure I'd want the headache of a uniform...but it's not a hill I'd die on.

Not sure, then. I guess I'd have to find out why they had that policy regarding disabled students.

With regards to "at or above grade level," I guess that's one way to have a high-acheiving school!

I really don't know, though...