In the past 2 years, I have tried to become much more active at church. I don't have a ton of social skills so I have to pick my battles and wait until I really feel led to do something before I try to participate or bring something up. However, when I do, I get the vibe as if he is expecting me to say or do something completely inappropriate. It's just a bunch of little things really, but over the course of two years, it's quite a bit. I notice things like, when refering to the day I got saved, which he has done multiple times, which was during a special event at church, he will refer to me as "somebody here at church", or "a person". He will never say my name, although he mentions others quite freely. This Sunday he was using random people as an example, putting his hand on somebody on the end of the pew on row 1, row 2, row 3, row 4, then stops when he gets to me. I've emailed and asked if I could sing a song at church... no response. Earlier this week I emailed to see if I could point out some volunteer work that somebody has been doing that has been recognized very much for it... no response. It's just one thing right after another like this. If I have a general comment or question, that's no problem, but if it has anything to do with me or my name coming out in front of the church, I get this weird vibe, it's almost like he just freezes up and purposely tries to avoid it. The problem, is that I don't know if it's just in my head, or if it's real, and I don't know what to do about it. I play guitar in front of the church twice a week so if it is real I don't know why I'm allowed to do that. It's kinda hard to do that though, when you feel as if the preacher thinks you're an embarassment of sorts. I don't know what to do.