Addressing adults in church

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Salty, Sep 2, 2008.

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Which are appropriate ways for children to address adults in church

  1. Reverend

    7 vote(s)
    15.9%
  2. Pastor

    24 vote(s)
    54.5%
  3. Mr., Mrs, Miss - with first name

    24 vote(s)
    54.5%
  4. Mr., Mrs, Miss - with last name

    28 vote(s)
    63.6%
  5. Sir, Madam

    14 vote(s)
    31.8%
  6. Uncle, Anut (not necessiarly relative - but as being friendly)

    11 vote(s)
    25.0%
  7. First name - only

    12 vote(s)
    27.3%
  8. Nickname

    4 vote(s)
    9.1%
  9. MS.

    3 vote(s)
    6.8%
  10. Other

    9 vote(s)
    20.5%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. Salty

    Salty
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    How should children (for this discussion) under the age of 13 address adults in church?
     
  2. NaasPreacher (C4K)

    NaasPreacher (C4K)
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    Totally a cultural matter, IMHO.
     
  3. Salty

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    What is the culturally accepted in Ireland?
     
  4. abcgrad94

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    However their parents expect them to. It's the parent's job to decide this, not mine, especially if the parents are there with their children. That is, unless your church has set "rules" like a school that the parents agree to adhere to before sending their kids to Sunday School.
     
  5. dan e.

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    I agree. Yet it may also be dependant upon the person they're addressing, and the relationship they have with them. When I was a teenager, or younger, I remember leaders that I called their first name, and they wouldn't have expected anything else based on our relationships. With someone not as personal with I would use Mr. or Mrs.
     
  6. NaasPreacher (C4K)

    NaasPreacher (C4K)
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    Usually first names. The only place I have seen differently is in church by very conservative IFB missionaries.

    I am normally called 'Roger'
    Sometimes Pastor Roger
    Rarely Pastor Parrow
    I do not like Rev Parrow
     
    #6 NaasPreacher (C4K), Sep 2, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 2, 2008
  7. puros_bran

    puros_bran
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    I was raised to call the Pastor, Pastor+ his lst name. Some prefer Brother+ last name buts its always Pastor unil they state they prefer otherwise.

    Deacons where always Deacon+last name (I still don't understand that one)

    Elders that are friends are called Mr/Mrs/Ms + first name

    Aquaintences/Guest are Mr/Mrs/Ms+ last name.

    When answering an elder it is ALWAYS Yes Maam,No Maam,Please & Thank You.

    I have tried to follow this with my children because I feel it is a cultural tradition worthy of being preserved, I still folllow it myself.

    A little respect goes along way.
     
  8. Tom Butler

    Tom Butler
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    I'm pretty much with puros_bran on this one.

    I call my pastor Bro. Curtis (his first name) or Pastor. He also likes being called Preacher. I think teenagers should call him Brother Curtis.

    For fellow church members, it varies. Brother Bill, sometimes just plain Bill. Brother Bill, for teenagers on down, never first names.

    In some churches, females are addressed as Sister So-and-So. Not ours. For young folks, it should be Miss Jane, or Miz Jane (not Ms), we're in the south, remember?

    Our society is afflicted with first-name-itis. Don't let kids get by with it. Make them tell you their full name.
     
  9. Jon-Marc

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    I picked a few that depends on who they are. I let everyone call me Jonathan except my daughters and grandkids. Some people outside the forums call me Jon-Marc. I have never called a pastor by his first name; it's always been Pastor. Otherwise, I think children should respect their elders and call them as they want to be called, and not just in church.
     
  10. ReformedBaptist

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    From the options above, there are a few folks I might like to call a-nut at our church...but I didn't choose that option. :laugh: :laugh:
     
  11. Revmitchell

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    I have my chldren call adults Mr. & Mrs. Lastname. I don't allow them to use adults first names.
     
  12. Crabtownboy

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    That is the way I grew up ... it is very Southern ... especially if you say Mr. or Mrs. or Miss [first name].
     
  13. annsni

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    I got to choose all of them! Well, Reverend is not a title we use at our church but if someone wanted that for themselves, we'd use it.

    But our senior pastor is Pastor and the rest of the pastors are Pastor Bob, Pastor Lee, Pastor Andy, etc.

    The youth pastors asked that all the kids call them Pete and Seth (well, now Pete is the family pastor and no longer the youth pastor but still.....)

    The pastor's wife is Mrs. Ayars. The other pastor's wives are Miss Mary, Miss Karen, etc.

    We usually start the kids out with Mr./Mrs./Miss last name unless we're really close with them and then they become Mr./Mrs./Miss first name (well, Mrs. firstname is cumbersome so Miss works better). I'm Miss Ann to many of the kids in church.

    Then there's our friend Chick. Total nickname. He's a cop. Did something funny once with chickory. Got the nickname. Kids call him Chick. They don't even know his real name. LOL

    A few very close friends of ours - those who are intimate friends (those who I'd consider as close as brothers and sisters) become Aunt and Uncle. But not so much people from church because we're only there 12 years. I'll use this for friends who were close friends before my kids were born.

    I think that covers most all of them. :)
     
  14. sag38

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    It's not how children address an adult that concerns me. Mr., Mrs, Sir, Mam, etc are all cultural. What matter is how a child responds to an adult. Is their respect? Is thier obedience? These two virtues are much more important than using titles. Eddie Haskel said "yes sir" and "yes mam" to the Cleavers but it was quite obvious that he had no true respect for anyone in authority over him.
     
  15. NaasPreacher (C4K)

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    Exactly - respect is not in titles.
     
  16. LeBuick

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    Same here... One of my daughters friends walked up and called me Chuck. My daughter took care o it before I realized what she said.

    At Church all kids use a title (Rev, Bro, Sis or Mother).
     
  17. Revmitchell

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    I disagree. It is an act of respect. And places you in an humble position to the elder. The evidence of this is found in the problem some have in doing it.
     
  18. preachinjesus

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    I picked "other" because it varies from place to place.

    Its funny when I go home because I am still calling people I have known since I grew up Mr or Mrs So and So. I think its a sign of respect, also I just feel funny calling them by their first name.

    Each situation varies in this respect, I know plenty of Pastors and church leaders who wish be called by their first name only, especially by the children in their ministry. Parenting also plays a role here.

    I think this is a good poll. :)
     
  19. NaasPreacher (C4K)

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    There are many times that I have been called 'Roger' with a lot more respect than certain times that I have been called 'Pastor.'

    You surely are not saying that all those who call be 'Roger' don't respect me and all those who call me 'Pastor' do respect me.
     
  20. sag38

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    Boy, reading my last post one would think that I didn't take grammar or spelling in school. "Their" is a plural possessive. "There," if I am not mistaken, is an adverb.

    In the military titles are certainly important and on certain jobs such as the police department or the fire station. Otherwise they are a regional matter. Where I used to live very few people required their children to say "yes sir" or "no sir." In fact, many adults would not allow children to call them "sir" or "mam." But, where I live now it is expected. When I try to tell people that other parts of the country don't expect children to use "yes sir" and "no mam," they just can't understand.

    Personally, I call my senior ladies by their first name. However, I use a Ms. before her name.
     
    #20 sag38, Sep 3, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 3, 2008

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