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Discussion in 'Youth Forum' started by SaggyWoman, Aug 11, 2001.
Should you date someone you should not marry? Why? (presuming they are believers)
"Only date those who would make a good mate."
The reason is, dating often leads to marriage. When your emotions become involved, it becomes very difficult to break off a bad relationship.
AMEN SISTER! I've made that mistake and nearly got myself in BIG trouble cause we let our emotions take over.
Until Next Post, Adam
I looked at the answers here as well as the question; and here's a slowly getting older single guy's (who probably wont get married until both he and his future wife qualify for geriatrics) opinion.
Should we date someone we wont marry?
The answer is why would we want to? Isnt it the whole purpose of the dating hell trying to find your mate? If you know you are not going to marry this person then dont date them.
Dating is supposed to lead to marriage before you go out on a date you are supposed to make the effort to winnow the ranks of available people beforehand, by seeing if they match certain criteria, and making sure that your criteria has a basis for support.
But then again one has to be careful how to define a 'date' since I go out with a girl from college with whom I have no intention of marrying and her intention is the same, since we're just friends - but since we go alone to the theatre or whereever together; theoritically we could be called going out on a date. Even though we would both agree we were not.
1 - Christian (in my case Im already toasted with this one - since for some strange reason I cant get Christian women to go out with me. Despite the fact Im a boring stick in the mud, who loves the discussion of theology, the non-Christian women 'throw' themselves at me.)
2 - Mildly attractive enough that if one woke up in bed beside them married that one would be more then willing to look at their face even when its not at its best.
3 - Intelligent - capable of having discussions on various topics ranging from who was the more influential cartoon cat on the North American psyche (heathcliff or garfield) to the relationship and breakdown with the eventual resynchronization of heaven and earth's timelines.
4 - Personality - As boring or at least more interesting then me - and preferrably someone who can on occasion be way too happy.
This may be a weird stand to take, but I don't really believe in dating. I've heard lots of questions about how I'll meet someone. I don't really know. I just trust God. If I am called to singleness forever, or just for this season of my life, that's ok. I recommend reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris and "Passion and Purity" by Elizabeth Elliot. I don't want anyone to think that I believe dating is wrong. Perhaps I should have said "I don't believe that dating is right for me."
I beleive that the purpose of dating is to find the one God has for you to marry. And since you cant, figuritively speaking, marry a non-Christian, you shouldnt date a non-Christian.
Grace said: "This may be a weird stand to take, but I don't really believe in dating. I've heard lots of questions about how I'll meet someone. I don't really know. I just trust God. If I am called to singleness forever, or just for this season of my life, that's ok. I recommend reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris and "Passion and Purity" by Elizabeth Elliot. I don't want anyone to think that I believe dating is wrong. Perhaps I should have said "I don't believe that dating is right for me.""
I completely agree
I don't agree with the idea of dating at all. I believe more in courting in some sense of the word. When you date someone you don't see who they really are because they are putting their best foot forward so you will like them.
I'm not after finding anyone. I figure if God wants me married then I will fall in love with someone and they will fall in love with me in His time. And since I believe you should be strong friends with anyone you persue i would not be trying to make friends simply because I was interested in them.
Just my 2 cents
Until Next Post, Adam