Debating online for all to see

Discussion in 'Pastoral Ministries' started by BroChris, Feb 21, 2011.

  1. BroChris

    BroChris
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    0
    I have one Christian friend who always likes a debate. He wants to argue over every verse of Scripture, and it just goes on forever. I know he won't budge on a single one, even when it's completely obvious that he has no ground to stand on. But he sucks me in nearly every time.

    It's difficult for me to just let it go. I want to so bad, knowing that it doesn't do any good, that it's better to maintain unity in the body of Christ rather than break fellowship with him over secondary matters (he's declared me an unbeliever I don't know how many times). I've moved the conversation to private messages before, but I also feel like I need to respond publicly because to not give an answer there appears to simply be ignoring him.

    I don't want to give the impression to onlookers that I'm disagreeable or that I like to argue over secondary matters. We should be of one mind, united not divided. But I also want to stand for Truth. How do I balance all this? I'm so torn in how I ought to respond to this person.
     
  2. Salty

    Salty
    Expand Collapse
    20,000 Posts Club
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2003
    Messages:
    22,122
    Likes Received:
    220
    First, there does not appear to be any unity or fellowship (Amos 3:3)
    Second -when "ignoring" just simply say :BangHead:
    Mark 14:57-61
    Third, Just mention that "For the time being can we agree to disagree? - and lets bring up again - after the Rapture :smilewinkgrin:" Eph 4:13
     
  3. abcgrad94

    abcgrad94
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2007
    Messages:
    5,533
    Likes Received:
    0
    BroChris, questioning the salvation of another BB member is against the forum rules and should be reported to the mods.

    If you don't want to debate this person, simply tell him so. If he persists to PM you and harass you, just ignore him. There is no debate when one party won't fight.
     
  4. BroChris

    BroChris
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    0
    No, it's not a BB member, it's an old friend from college. He tried to debate me on things I post on facebook, twitter, and youtube. He was this way in college, too, but he's recently become much more serious about his faith (which is great), but insists he's right about everything (which is not so great).

    His most recent attempt (which prompted this thread) is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNaO8wwE8-U

    The last time we debated stuff, which was also on a youtube video I posted in behalf of my church, we moved it to private messages and he eventually said that if I wanted to talk about it further with him, the only way to do it would be to sit down with him and his pastor so they can straighten me out (not in those words, but that was basically the message).

    I don't feel like I can simply ignore him completely. Members of my church go to these videos, and I want to model patience and answering in wisdom without becoming argumentative. If I simply say, "I don't want to debate with you," this to me sounds a bit argumentative in itself. Here's the response I typed out for him but have yet to send because I don't want to appear arrogant or argumentative:

    I want to be the kind of person who can just let it go, but as I said, I get sucked in.
     
  5. Salty

    Salty
    Expand Collapse
    20,000 Posts Club
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2003
    Messages:
    22,122
    Likes Received:
    220
    Do you get to bring your pastor to straighten him out? :smilewinkgrin:
    Seriously, why does he need to bring his pastor -if he is so certain of his belief - then he should let his Bible be the deciding factor.

    Not sure if you gave the precise items he debates, but it sounds like legalistic issues.
     
  6. Tom Bryant

    Tom Bryant
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2006
    Messages:
    4,439
    Likes Received:
    0
    Why do you feel like you have to justify yourself to the person? You don't have to attend every dance you're invited to. Let your people know what is going on and why you're just going to stop responding to every thing the person says. Baptists are smart people, they'll understand.
     
  7. webdog

    webdog
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2005
    Messages:
    24,691
    Likes Received:
    0
    From that video I see what you mean about his abrasiveness. That is annoying, to say it mildly. :)

    He is partly right on his reply, though that it is talking about the Church...and that's it. He does not say what he believes the verse is saying at all, he simply rebukes your understanding of it (which is also partly right). In context it is speaking of sexual immorality, but like many other Scripture, there are numerous truths. If sexual immorality should be avoided, so should sloth and gluttony (what your video shows). The way to combat someone like this is to merely point out what I just did and let the world read the truth.

    Have you asked him why he is doing what he is doing? Let him know it offends you.
     
  8. BroChris

    BroChris
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    0
    I have. He thinks he's a prophet and it's his job to correct the Church in how we've strayed from the Bible.

    I think more than anything I just needed to vent about this. I think I'm finally ready (thanks to your encouragement) to stop engaging him in these arguments. I appreciate your listening ears and helpful advice.
     
  9. michael-acts17:11

    michael-acts17:11
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Messages:
    857
    Likes Received:
    0
    Have you considered that perhaps God has allowed this person into your life as a means of maturing you in your knowledge of Scripture? I have found that most pastors are rarely challenged form the congregation on what they believe or why they believe it. Whether this man is right or wrong, this could be a great opportunity for you to study the Word beyond seminary or denominational teachings. Search the Scriptures & don't be afraid to take a look at each doctrine from an opposing viewpoint; it may be correct. Perhaps you could start a Bible study with several learned men of your congregation with whom the depth of Scripture, and therefore the truth of Scripture, may be plumbed & discovered. He may be hungry for the meat of the Word without all the milk of sermons.

    The man's video may seem abrasive, but he did point out an aspect of the context which you originally denied. 1Cor 6:18 sets the context, "Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body." Although he may be somewhat abrasive, there is a need for "prophets" who call the church & its leaders back to a deeper study of Scripture. I'm not assuming this guy is 100% right(he may be a loon for all I know) I'm just posting my opinions.:D

    I watched the "how NOT to evangelize" video. Is that you or him in the video? Are the vids done by various members of the church or all by him? If he is using the church's name & image, he should have the consent of the church.
     
    #9 michael-acts17:11, Feb 22, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 22, 2011
  10. BroChris

    BroChris
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    0
    Michael, I'm the pastor of Grace Baptist Church. I, along with the youth and children of the church, made all the videos. The person I'm referring to who makes me want to do this :BangHead: is not a member of the church, he's an old friend from college.

    I'm certainly open to learning from him. I have learned many things from him. I'm more frustrated with the way that he approaches me.
     
  11. rbell

    rbell
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    11,103
    Likes Received:
    0
    This is where the "avoid foolish arguments" concept should be practiced. I think you should ignore him. He's more interested in brawls than discussion. Nothing edifying will come of it. If he's consistently calling you an unbeliever, this guy should not be engaged, IMHO. Once again...discussion with him causes more damage than no discussion.

    If this guy is in your church, time for church discipline. Biblically handle it, Matthew 18-like.

    If he's not, I'd simply tell him that "I believe our disagreements are harming the body of Christ, and not helping me in my walk. Out of respect for wanting to honor God, as well as my own walk and the well-being of our church, we need to refrain from debates on biblical and spiritual issues." If he can't honor that, cease communicating with him.

    And like I said...if he's in any way connected to your church, or has ties with others in your church...I'd be sure and have my church leadership/elders/etc. on the same page. Let them know what's going on...and get your "prayer warriors" to commit to pray for him.

    Just MHO. Your mileage may vary. Void where prohibited. See store for details. Penalty for private use, $300. :D
     
  12. webdog

    webdog
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2005
    Messages:
    24,691
    Likes Received:
    0
    Better yet, invite him here...we'll straighten him out :laugh:
     
  13. webdog

    webdog
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2005
    Messages:
    24,691
    Likes Received:
    0
    Are you denying the fact Scripture can have multiple truths in one text? This "prophet" did nothing but say "you are wrong".
     
  14. michael-acts17:11

    michael-acts17:11
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Messages:
    857
    Likes Received:
    0
    If he's not a member of your church, I'd tell him to take a walk. Being Christian doesn't mean that we have to subject ourselves to the beratement of others. Perhaps you could suggest that he found his own church & put his ideas into practice.
     
  15. michael-acts17:11

    michael-acts17:11
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2010
    Messages:
    857
    Likes Received:
    0
    That was my point, that the context is also speaking to how we care for the temple that is our bodies. God is a master of multiple yet harmonious meanings.
     
  16. Jkdbuck76

    Jkdbuck76
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2007
    Messages:
    2,263
    Likes Received:
    64
    Even the ones that believe "the English corrects the Greek and Hebrew"? :laugh: I listened to a sermon mp3 on the way to work one morning and when the baptist preacher said this, I bout ditched the car I was laughing so hard. Sorry....I couldn't resist.

    BroChris, I can only tell you this: What are u trying to accomplish....make him more like u or is he trying to convert u? Since you don't agree with him, he calls u an unbeliever!? Time to swallow that pride and spend your time doing other things. Selling used paint would be a better use of your time!! I think you will set a better example by not debating with this person anymore....sounds like it is creating more HEAT than LIGHT. Preacher, your flock needs you more than you need to debate. Besides, if you need to argue, you can call my wife....she has a black belt in arguing and she will take you DOWN!

    I am a very crass and sarcastic person, but I am trying to help you out on this one because you came here and asked us to help. Brother, I will pray for you since this is obviously bothering you.
     
  17. Jkdbuck76

    Jkdbuck76
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2007
    Messages:
    2,263
    Likes Received:
    64
    Boy, I'm sure glad we've NEVER had anyone like THAT here at Baptist Board!

    See, BroChris?

    Crass.




    Sarcastic.
     
  18. abcgrad94

    abcgrad94
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2007
    Messages:
    5,533
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yep. I'll get him with my rollin' pin!:thumbs:
     
  19. BroChris

    BroChris
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    0
    Here's how I responded to him. I commented publicly on the video that he commented on:

    Then I also sent him this private message:

     
  20. rbell

    rbell
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    11,103
    Likes Received:
    0
    You handled it well.
     

Share This Page

Loading...