Finding the right church for me....pls help

Discussion in '2004 Archive' started by Lori, Sep 9, 2004.

  1. Lori

    Lori
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    I will have to make this as brief as possible so please bear with me....

    I am trying to get back to going to church and finding the church God wants me to be at. It is more important to me that I be where He wants me to be and not where "I" want me to be. I am single and would like to have more outings and make new friends so I am trying to find a church that is not too big that I will be overwhealmed, and not one that is so small I will be unable to meet people of my age. I know that church is not to be looked on as a place to pick up people and I am very much not trying to do that. I have found one that is of good size, however the message is not quite as F&B as I'd like and the music is a little too contemporary. However, I see that it is a church where I could grow and do many good things for God. I have prayed on this much and will continue to do so. Any assistance or advice would be most helpful. Thanks again,

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  2. Gina B

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    Advice? I'll go for it.
    Don't be a martyr. I've not seen anyone say "I couldn't stand this church, so I knew it's where God wanted me".
    Check out the churches statement of faith and see if it's scriptural, or call and talk to them if that isn't possible. If it agrees with scripture go check it out, and if you like it there ya go.
    Simple enough. :D
    Gina
     
  3. DavidsAngel

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    I have to agree with Gina. I just went though this. I went from a Independant Fundamental Baptist Church to a Southern Baptist Church. While not everyone was wild about my decision, they did in the end realize that it was mine. The church you look for has GOT to fit you like a glove. If it doesn't try another.

    The best place to find a church is talk to people that you trust. Those that share your belief's. In my case, I felt compelled to go there. I felt a draw to move form the IFB to the SBC. Sometimes that is the way God works. When he wants you to do something he tends to make it known :D .

    Good luck and keep us posted please, I will keep you in my prayers

    Wendy
     
  4. Lori

    Lori
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    There is a church in my area that I have not gone to yet and I am going to try and attend it this weekend if possible. Thanks again and I will do my best to keep everyone posted on what I find and how it goes.

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  5. Pastor J

    Pastor J
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    One suggestion is to go to a church for several weeks. One service is usually not enough to get to know the church.
     
  6. superdave

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    I agree, My wife and I attended our current church for about 6 months before we joined. We wanted to be certain that we were aligned with the philosophy of the leadership, and really know how various parts of the ministry operated. You cannot know a church by visiting a few services, you have to make friends, talk to the pastor(s) and get involved as much as possible as a non-member to really determine if you will be able to agree with what is going on there. I am not big on leaving churches, nor attending ones that I have problems with, so we decided it would be much less painful to make sure before we joined.
     
  7. GeneMBridges

    GeneMBridges
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    Lori,

    First, let me commend your attitude. Your first statement that you want to be where God wants you to be and not just where "I" (eg. you) want yourself to be puts you soooooooo much further along than you can possibly realize. I see so many people asking this same question for the advice of others and hardly ever do I see any of them making that statement first. When it gets brought up by the advisors, they end up replying "Oh, yeah, of course, I meant that," but it comes off like an afterthought rather than the truth. Therefore, I commend you!

    Second, here's my two cents.

    As you pray over your decision, might I suggest an exercise in prayer and study of Scripture. Prayer is two way communication, but don't forget, God speaks through Scripture as well as prayer and circumstances.

    While none of us will find a Scripture that says "Lori, Thou shalt attend and join (Insert name here) Baptist Church," we will find the charactertistics of what, all things being ideal, a New Testatment church is like.

    I suggest taking a notebook and reading through the Book of Acts during the week. Read and look for the characteristics of the early church. What were it's positive charcteristics? What were its negatives? (Remember, not everything in Acts is a role model for us; some is there as an example of what NOT to do; be sure to sift those things out carefully? What were the positive and negative characteristics of its leadership as well as its members? How did it deal with crisis? How did it deal with conflict? How did it arrive at consensus? How did it affect the people around it? (Look for the descriptive as well as the practical). Now, go through your study either as you go or after you are done in a very prayerful manner. Highlight or underline those aspects that the Lord speaks to you personally about? Look for the things that really speak to not just your personal situtation, but also to your overall walk with the Lord. The Lord might show you some personal things you need to work on yourself. He may show you some of your strengths as well?

    Now take that information into your world and find a church that fits those things for you personally. Don't forget also that you are not just going there to have your needs met, but because the Lord knows of a local church that needs you as well. Where you are strong, they may be weak. Where you are weak, they may be strong, and so forth.

    Because of the attitude of your heart right now, that you want what the Lord wants for you. You can be assured, that He will lead you to that local church.
     
  8. Lori

    Lori
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    Gene, one of the other reasons that I desparately want to get back into a good church is that all my life I have had trouble reading the Bible. I have been saved since 14 and am assured of that. I can understand the old English in the KJV so that's not really a stumbling block. My stumbling block seems to be that I just cannot get through the Bible cover to cover. I have tried many times in many ways to do this and have failed each time. It frustrates me to no end. I understand that Satan would hate to see me actually get through the Bible so I know that all my attempts he has thwarted. It is my hope that at a church I can become more disciplined and able to get past the excuses (end of the day I'm exhausted, too early to get up, tv on, time with family, full weekends). All of these things get in my way :mad: and I fear that if people knew how much I struggled with this they would think "well you're obviously not saved or not a christian since that's the first thing you should be doing faithfully."

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  9. Lori

    Lori
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    SuperD, that is sound advice and you have made an excellent point. Going just to one or two services can't really completely show you how that church works. Like I said in previous post I will try that church again.

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  10. Bob Farnaby

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    Lori, if the reading is the problem, try an audio version. There are quite a number of recordings around in different translations. Quite honestly sometimes too much emphasis is put on 'reading the bible' when hearing it will serve the same purpose.

    (NO folks, not against reading, do support ereading as much as possible, so don't jump on the issue here)

    Will pray with you and for you for God'sleading to the right church for you to be in.

    Regards
    Bob
     
  11. Lori

    Lori
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    Thank-you Bob. It makes me feel a little better knowing that I am not the only one that struggles with the reading. I feel ashamed of myself that I can't stick to reading it better. I have been doing a bit better in the past week or so, since I have been working out of a Bible Prophecy workbook, where you have to look the scriptures up for the answers to the questions.

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  12. Lori

    Lori
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    Just a leetle update on my church home progress.

    Well I have been to 2 now in the past 2 weeks that made me cry on my way home. I know that you should maybe attend more than one service in order to find out if that is the church home(ch) you are supposed to be at, but I was just massively uncomfy at both and felt despair on my way home.

    Both had live bands and praise teams and lots of hand-in-the-air-waving and clapping. I kinda felt more like that I had just been to a concert instead of church service. I know that there are churches and people out there that this type of praise workes best for them, unfortunately I am not one of those people. I was brought up in the quiet, don't clap and all that kinda church. For me I look at church as time for me to have quiet meditation and visiting with God. The loudness of both just made me feel really out of place. I know that people in the churches must have realized that I was feeling out of place as when everyone else was clapping I was standing stone still. Did I also mention that the messages at the churches were a little weak for my liking? I know I sound so much like a whiner, but is there something wrong with me spiritualy if I can't get into all that stuff?

    BTW I happed to catch Bishop? Roy Brown on the word channel on TV last night. While I can't say that I liked the clapping in his congregation I will say that that man can preach it! He was preaching on the Roman's Road and man that was some good preachin'. Guess he's on at about 11ish CST.

    Well that's about it. Thanks for listening to me whine.

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  13. williemakeit

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    Lori,

    I had to go back to my roots (the preaching, singing, etc. that I was saved under) in order to find peace about which church to attend. Yes, as others have said, prayer and bible study (reading or listening) do play a critical role in your decision.

    I also used the approach of what could I bring to this church, versus what can it do for me. In my case, it was initially my tithes and offerings; however, as a new church start, I believe that was, and still is, a crucial place of service at the church. Of course, since then, I have received more from God than I can ever give in time and money, and I am also enjoying other areas of service. It truly is more blessed to give than to receive. Also, did I mention pray, pray, pray.

    God bless, and I will make a special mention of you in my prayers.
     
  14. Lori

    Lori
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    Thanks willie. I will be out of town this weekend otherwise I'd be going to yet another church nearby and see if I would be more comfortable there. You do have a good point tho that maybe I can look at it from the standpoint of what I can contribute to them. It is a delicate balance finding just the right church home. On the one hand you don't want to be so uncomfortable there that you just cringe everytime you think of going, however on the other hand, you don't want to go to a church just because it's got great social stuff. The purpose I see in church is to 1)Worship God, 2)Learn His word and all about Him, 3)Fellowship and be part of a wonderful family

    azwyld
    <*}}}><
     
  15. FBCPastorsWife

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    Lori, I know that many people on this board are against the views of the Sword of the Lord, but we do have these churches in the Houston area listed on our website. Maybe you can get in contact with them if you have not already visited. I pray you find a good church soon.

    Christchurch Baptist Fellowship
    Dr. Johnny Pope, Pastor
    12501 Champion Forest Dr.
    Houston, TX 77066
    (281) 866-8377
    christchurchbaptist.msn.com
    www.christchurchbaptist.org

    Frontier Baptist Temple
    Pastor Bobby J. Campbell
    1923 Antoine B-2
    Houston, TX 77055
    (713) 784-7601

    Westside Baptist Church
    Pastor Richard D. Butts
    9300 Hammerly Blvd
    Houston, TX 77080
    (713) 467-2763
    Slogan - Standing for the old time gospel and the authority of the Word of God
     
  16. AVL1984

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    FBCPW, I believe all those churches you listed are fairly decent churches, if I remember correctly, whether they are in the SOL or not. ;)

    There are also many good conservative SBC churches in Houston. Just check the SBC website at
    http://www.sbc.net They have a place for you to look up churches in your area on their site.
     
  17. GeneMBridges

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    Lori,

    If you look here: http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?item_no=11893X&netp_id=106276&event=ESRCN&item_code=WW

    You will find this book:
    The Quiet Time Companion
    WILLOUG / Inter-varsity Press / 1999
    Retail Price: $14.99
    CBD Price: $11.99 - You Save $3.00 (20%)
    CBD Stock No: WW11893X
    ISBN: 0830811893
    Availability: Available to ship on or about 10/27/04.


    If you think that using print material to help you through quiet times is useful, this is an EXCELLENT resource. It contains a variety of studies. Some are whole book studies; some are character studies; some are issue studies; some are word studies; etc. It's not a devotional type of book. You actually have questions to answer about the text that make you think about the Bible passage for that day. The authors/editor don't/doesn't spoon feed you either, so you're not getting a "this is what the text is about" interpretation. It's a "What does this passage say about....?" type of format, followed with "How does this apply in your life?" kind of format. Usually, there are four or five questions for each passage each day. It takes about half an hour or so to work through it, and it is self-paced. If you use it the way it's intended, you'll actually get through the whole Bible in two years.

    I HIGHLY recommend it.
     
  18. Lori

    Lori
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    I will check that out and see if that helps. Thanks for listing it I appreciate it.

    azwyld
    &lt;*}}}&gt;&lt;
     

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