Goodbye

Discussion in '2003 Archive' started by Larry in Tennessee, Nov 3, 2003.

  1. Larry in Tennessee

    Larry in Tennessee
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    There are many things going on around here lately which are very disturbing to me. There are so many threads which deteriorate into petty bickering and name calling. It would be one thing if this were the exception, but it seems rather, to be the norm, as thread after thread ends up this way. I have seen people have their salvation called into question over such petty issues as the music they listen to, the version of the Bible they choose to read, or the political party they vote for. As Christians, I feel we are called to lift one another up, but instead, I see Christians tearing down other Christians, and it breaks my heart. Why must God's people continuously hurt God's people? I have kept silent until now, because I figured I would get banned, as seems to happen to anyone who disagrees with the status quo, but that dosen't matter anymore, as this will be my last post to BaptistBoard. When I joined, I was hoping for a place where Jesus would be exalted, but instead, I see a place where Christians are being torn down time and time again.

    I will close by saying that I love you all in Christ Jesus. I pray that He will fill you with His love and Goodness, as only He is able to do, and that He will richly bless each of your lives. I will see you all before the throne of Christ!

    Goodbye,
    Larry
     
  2. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    Larry --

    I fear our paths have not crossed often, but I am
    sad to see you go. While I have not been able to
    get to know you at all, the very reasons you should
    stay are the reasons you listed for leaving.

    There are a lot of fine people here, and the
    majority of them have no desire to see the arguing
    and name-calling, nor do they join in on it.

    Perhaps we could count the number of times
    the threads deteriorate, or take note of which
    threads so that they can be avoided, or even
    take note of the ones who do tis so that they can
    be avoided. If these numbers, therads, and
    people were compared to the others, you would
    find more reasons to stay than to go.

    :)
     
  3. Elnora

    Elnora
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    Larry,

    Funny how the Lord works. I just confronted finally this very thing you addressed so much better than I. I am leaving also. I am staying until after Christmas as I committed myself to a dear lady in the Christmas exchange. Some will ask you to stay and continue to allow people to kill the brethren with their tongue. As I said, I tried to bring it up and my only choice is to shut up & stay and watch the slaughter continue, or leave. I will leave also after the exchange, making some very happy to see me go.

    There really is nothing else you can do. It is only right to leave in my opinion when you feel there is no resolution. It is easier to ignore rather than confront.

    I hope I didn't hijack your thread but it seems the Lord gave me this opportunity to let you know you aren't the only one who sees this problem.

    There are many who have blessed me and I hope to stay in contact with them. I pray for us all including those who stay.

    Go in peace. God bless you.
     
  4. Elnora

    Elnora
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    Abiyah,

    The problem is how many more threads will have to be ignored until there is none left to post on? I cannot off the top of my head seen one serious discussion that has not turned into a slander rather than debate. :(
     
  5. Jim1999

    Jim1999
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    "All that is needed for evil to succeed, is for one good person to do nothing."

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  6. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24
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    I am sorry that when people feel they need to leave to go to another board, they have to turn their good-byes into a bashing of the Baptist Board.

    We are not perfect here, we're just forgiven.

    I am always sorry to see anyone leave here, but if you must go then God speed.

    Blessings,
    ┬žue

    [ November 04, 2003, 12:26 AM: Message edited by: I Am Blessed 16 ]
     
  7. Clint Kritzer

    Clint Kritzer
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    I'd like to hear more.

    Please tell me in what ways you feel that the administration of this board could make it a better place and a better reflection of Christ.

    Refrain from naming names, please. Don't let it become a slugfest. Don't fall into the same trap as those whom you criticize. Give me constructive recommendations. You have a vital opportunity here.

    Clint Kritzer
    Administrator
     
  8. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    Elnora --

    I am sorry to see you leave, too. Very sorry,
    because I have at least gotten to know you some
    and have enjoyed our exchanges. Of course, we
    can stay in touch, but it won't be the same. :)

    Sure, I usually stay away from the Bible Transla-
    tion and Arminian/Calvinism threads most of the
    time, but once in a while, there will be a topic even
    there that draws me in. But then, I guess I do walk
    into frays at times, and sometimes, I guess I have
    unfortunately caused some. :)

    I had the unfortunate experience of saying some
    choice things on another board about my old
    church, learning later that the woman I said them
    to was my old pastor's daughter. I felt so stinking
    bad that I haven't been back, and I never said
    goodbye. I certainly know I am not perfect -- far,
    far from it.

    I do wish you woud stay on, but if you must go . . .

    :-(
     
  9. David Mark

    David Mark
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    Very big sigh.

    What the gumdrops is going on here?
     
  10. Elnora

    Elnora
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    I was surprised to see this thread reopened.

    I must say to alleviate any fears about bashing here. I have never gone behind anyones back to bash. I will never go to another board and gossip about this one. I never have and pray I never will. When I tell people I love them I mean it.

    God bless.
     
  11. Larry in Tennessee

    Larry in Tennessee
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    Sue,
    I didn't mean for this to be a bashing of the BaptistBoard. I had hoped rather, that it would be taken as a constructive critisizm.

    Clint, thank you for asking. I hadn't intended on posting again, but you seem to genuinly want to help, and I feel like I owe you an answer. I have seen several people express honest opinions on a variety of topics, only to be attacked with words like "I can't believe you call yourself a Christian if you believe that". In many cases, comments like that are made in response to a political point of view, and not a theological point of view. Clint, what makes it worse is that comments like that are rarely edited out. Nothing could be more hurtful to a believer than to have a brother or sister question their commitment to Christ. In many cases, others will pile on with comments like "God hating liberal". I hate to see anyone drug through the mud like that over an honest opinion. I have no problem with heated debate, as long as both sides keep to debating the issues and not resorting to personal attacks. I also have no problem with correcting a brother or sister who may be in error, although I feel that such correction would be better if they were handled in PM format.

    I hope this will be taken in the spirit it is intended. I realize that the moderators have a hard job keeping up with all of the posts. I also realize that people say things on emotion sometimes that they later regret. I just wish that everyone would learn to edit for themselves and keep the hurtful comments to themselves. Thank you, and God Bless you!
     
  12. Thankful

    Thankful
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    I agree with Larry, although I see this in all the forums that I read on this Board. Presently, people are afraid to post an opinion for fear of being attacked, labeled, or banned. The atmosphere is stifling and the opinions expressed must be of the majority. Rules are not enforced equally. There seems to be a double standard.

    This is the first Board I was a member of. I have been a member longer than the date shows because I forgot my user name and password and had to reapply. When I first joined the Board, I was very lonely and found refuge here.

    Since joining this Board, I have been on some non-religious Boards and I am ashamed to say that no one is attacked when one disagrees or has a difference of opinion on those Boards the way they are attacked here. And yes, I have had my salvation questioned here on this Board.

    The women's forums on this Board have all but dried up.

    When I post, I try to think of the all the ones who are reading only, especially the non-Christians who are searching for the truth.

    I feel that the Baptist Board entry statement and I quote BaptistBoard.com is a free discussion forum for the Baptist community.
    We believe that open and honest exchange of ideas can be beneficial to all participants.
    is no longer being applied." The Board does not seem to be for all types of Baptists.

    Another problem, I see is that questions from new members are not taken seriously and many times these questions are not answered. I know that many of my questions have been totally ignored.

    Further, is it against the rules of the Baptist Board to join other Boards? Many of the members were on other Boards before they came here and they still are.

    To answer your question about how the administration could make this Board a better place and a reflection of Christ would be to have the rule "NO questioning of member's salvation, even the nonBaptist". Another thing would be to address the opinion and not the person.

    I also think that people take some opinions as an attack personnally when they are not, but I don't know anyway to solve that.

    I don't know if it is true that permanent banning has been done without warning, but if so, it seems members should be warned at least three times before a permanent banning.

    I think the fear of permanent banning without warning which may be caused by a rumour or misunderstanding is another problem with the Board at this time.

    I appreciate this Board and thank you for the work the Administrators and Webmaster are doing to further the Gospel of our Savior Jesus Christ.
     
  13. Jim1999

    Jim1999
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    Even beautiful roses have thorns, and often they prick when we least expect it. So it is with people. We must learn or adapt to taking the good with the bad, try to see the good, but always alert for the thorns in the brush.

    There are a lot of good people on the Board and I appreciate them immensely. There are also some who are looking for a lifting hand, a little pat on the back, and we must be aware of them also. As george Beverly Shea sings, "If I can help somebody as I pass along, then my living will not be in vain."

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  14. Clint Kritzer

    Clint Kritzer
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    Absolutely not!

    Thank you for your replies so far. I am still listening.
     
  15. Thankful

    Thankful
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    Thank you, Clint.
     
  16. Jim1999

    Jim1999
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    I will say this, moderating is not easy, and from my experience as a moderator, fairness was always a consideration. I agree that rules were not always applied equally, because moderators are human too. I assure all readers, that before a decision is made, the situation is generally thought through carefully.

    May the Lord continue to bless the moderators, and may we continue to respect all, moderators and people alike. Afterall, the main purpose here is fellowship, and we all should be pulling the oars in the same direction.

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  17. GloryBound

    GloryBound
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    Clint I so want to address this and was going to, but I have been called out. Are you going to leave this open a little longer?


    Love in Christ,
    GloryBound
     
  18. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    I worry a lot about whether I have done some of the
    things mentioned here. Sometimes, it is easy to
    get carried away with the passion of the moment
    and I will write things that may be offensive. I
    know that in recent days, I have had to hold
    myself back in one thread from writing what I
    was really thinking, but what I did write was still
    very harsh. It is very difficult for me to know
    where that line is, so that I will not cross it.

    I know, too, that there are two board members
    whom, if I am to be honest, I just do not like! In
    order to keep from writing too much, I simply
    avoid them and one other (that I actually do like!),
    especially since I have admittedly written clear
    statements to two of those which clearly did
    question their salvation. However, when I did it,
    I did it out of sincere concern for them.

    So one wonders at times where that line is . . .
    and have I crossed it . . . and was I not repri-
    manded because no one noticed, because others
    agree, or because I am seen as incorrigible?

    But regarding PMs for discussion of some
    problem between people, I have seen this used
    and abused too often. Too many people have
    said they were viciously attacked on PMs, that
    people use these because they are afraid to
    show their real faces in public but will on a PM,
    etc. For this reason, if I am going to write such a
    thing, I would rather write it in public and take the
    heat. At least this way, I can learn from the
    experience, rather than being covert and possibly
    never learn anything. Besides, many PMs have
    found their ways out onto the public board, to the
    shame of us all.

    Once, I wrote a PM in support of a board member,
    and the receiver completely turned what I said
    around,attempting to make me out to be evil. I
    learned from this to use PMs even less. I will use
    the PMs to communicate privately on a light level,
    but I will not use them in order to deiberately
    discuss anoteh member, whether supportively
    or not.

    And finally, I think the moderators have been doing
    a wonderful job. I would not want their job, so I
    really appreciate them all.
     
  19. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24
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    I certainly hope a guest or a baby Christian thinking about joining does not see this thread. I would hate for them to get turned off by the comments of a few when there are so many good people here.

    It is opening up private scars to people who did not even know there was a problem.

    What ever happened to solving these issues via PM or, at the very least, in the Members Private Forum which is password protected? :confused:

    BTW, it's not just some of the members who are afraid to speak out. It works that way for moderators as well. :(
     
  20. j_barner2000

    j_barner2000
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    I have found that communication normally involves many levels of expression.. Facial, posture, tonal qualities etc... we need to remember that when we post they cant hear us or look at us so it is hard and cold or hot and flaming etc. the written (or typed) word must be very carefully chosen.
     

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