Hard to reach teens.

Discussion in 'Youth Forum' started by tinytim, Jan 4, 2006.

  1. tinytim

    tinytim
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    I asked a question on another tread, but didn't want to hi-jack it, so I am asking it here.

    In your opinion, what is the best way to reach hard to reach teens?

    One teen said, "as a teen, i have to honestly say that nothing you can do will get through to us (teens). that is not all teens i am talking about, but generally the ones that need it."

    I think unconditional love will do it, what about you?
     
  2. Clean1

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    Prayer. Oh... and also don't push it on them. Just pray that God supplies u with proper opportunity to witness and ask Him to help u recognize those opportunities.
     
  3. UnchartedSpirit

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  4. Pastor_Bob

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    Consistency is the key, in my opinion. Leaders cannot have the "do as I say, not as I do" mentality.

    For teens that have headed in the wrong direction, they need to be clearly shown the truth in genuine love. Lots of prayer, patience, and always being firm but fair should do it.
     
  5. bapmom

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    There will be some who will remain hard to reach, no matter what we do. We need to keep those lines of communication open though. Don't make those teens feel as if they can't come talk to you when they need to, because sooner or later they will hit "rock bottom", and they need to know they can turn to you. When talking to them don't always be "preaching at them." Just visit with them, find out how they are......be real.

    I agree with Pastor_Bob too. [​IMG]
     
  6. BIC

    BIC
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    We are having issues with our 17 year old not wanting to go to our church. He (in his words) doesnt connect with the youth minister. Do we as a family go searching for a different youth minister? We also have a 13 year old who attends the youth programs and doesnt complain of course he has a buddy that is there. Me and my wife differ on how to address this dilema. My older son wants to attend a bible study that others on the baseball team are particpating in. Do we move to the same church and support him? Or stay where we are at.

    Thanks for your reply
     
  7. Pastor_Bob

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    There are several questions that you must ask yourself and then answer honestly.
    1. Have you whole-heartedly endorsed the youth ministry at your church?
    2. Have you verbally demonstrated your support of the youth pastor in front of your son?
    3. Are you careful not to criticize the pastor or the youth pastor in front of the children?
    4. Are you living a consistent Christian life in front of your children so that they will want what you have?

    Please do not answer these questions here on the board. Ask yourself these questions and then act accordingly.

    If you can answer "yes" to these questions, then I would recommend that you invite the youth pastor over for dinner some evening. Make him aware of what he can do to reach out to your son. For example, going outside and playing catch, talk to him about baseball or whatever else may interest him.

    Maybe this youth pastor can pick your son up some Saturday and take him to visit some of your son's friends and try to get them to come to church. Perhaps he would be willing to host a party at his house and allow your son to invite his friends.

    Just a few suggestions.
     
  8. BIC

    BIC
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    Thanks Pastor_Bob for the insight and suggestions.
     
  9. rbell

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    BIC, give us a bit more info about the Bible study your son would like to attend. Is it on Sunday, or at an "off-church" time?

    I'm always excited to hear that a kid wants to attend Bible study. And it's natural to want to be around those whom you are close with. Is there a possibility of a "both/and" compromise here?

    Having said that, I think it is wise to more fully explore why he's not happy at your church's youth ministry. Sometimes the answer is spiritual (conviction, etc.), but other times it's not so much (my friends go to the other church, at my church I have to hang out with the "little kids" like my brother, etc.)

    God's best to you,
    RB
     
  10. KJV4JJ

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    prayer, prayer, prayer.... nothing is impossible with God, and no teen is UNREACHABLE.
     
  11. College_Gurl

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    I'm in college now, but I'm basically still a teenager kinda sorta (just turn 19 Jan.) Coming from a me, I think that you should just keep on talking & doing stuff w/ your teens. Teenagers have alot of stuff on their plates this day & age. It's not an easy world to live in! I personally always longed for my moms love which I never really received. So, I developed the attitude of "I don't care, I'm to far out of reach, Who would want to love me, & so on." So hey, assure them that you do care every time you see them. THEY ARE LISTENING, WHETHER YOU KNOW IT OR NOT. They long for that attention & LOVE!
     
  12. tinytim

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    You just confirmed what I believe..

    Show them you really love them... Really love them... not a phony love, but a real one and they will eventually respond..

    I think to many adults want instant results.
    But it may take a while.
     

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