How Did You Become A Pastor?

Discussion in '2000-02 Archive' started by DHK, Nov 15, 2001.

  1. DHK

    DHK
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    I went to Bible College and seminary, and then was ordained by my own local church with others participating.
    Recently I received this email:

    Minister Charles Simpson has the power to make you a LEGALLY ORDAINED MINISTER within 48 hours!!!!
    BE ORDAINED NOW!
    As a minister, you will be authorized to perform the rites and ceremonies of the church!!

    WEDDINGS
    MARRY your BROTHER, SISTER, or your BEST FRIEND!!
    Don't settle for being the BEST MAN OR BRIDES' MAID
    Most states require that you register your certificate (THAT WE SEND YOU) with the state prior to conducting the ceremony.

    FUNERALS
    A very hard time for you and your family Don't settle for a minister you don't know!! Most states require that you register your certificate (THAT WE SEND YOU) with the state prior to conducting the ceremony.

    BAPTISMS
    You can say "WELCOME TO THE WORLD!!!! I AM YOUR MINISTER AND YOUR UNCLE!!" What a special way to welcome a child of God.

    FORGIVENESS OF SINS
    The Catholic Church has practiced the forgiveness of sins for centuries **Forgiveness of Sins is granted to all who ask in sincerity and willingness to change for the better!!

    VISIT CORRECTIONAL FACILITIES Since you will be a Certified Minister, you can visit others in need!! Preach the Word of God to those who have strayed from the flock

    WANT TO START YOUR OWN CHURCH??
    After your LEGAL ORDINATION, you may start your own congregation!! At this point you must be wondering how much the Certificate costs. Right? Well, let's talk about how much the program is worth. Considering the value of becoming a CERTIFIED MINISTER I'd say the program is easily worth $100. Wouldn't you agree? However, it won't cost that much. Not even close! My goal is to make this life changing program affordable so average folks can benefit from the power of it. Since I know how much you want to help others, you're going to receive your Minister Certification for under $100.00... Not even $50.00... You are going to receive the entire life-changing course for only $29.95.
    For only $29.95 you will receive:
    1. 8-inch by 10-inch certificate IN COLOR, WITH GOLD SEAL. (CERTIFICATE IS PROFESSIONALLY PRINTED BY AN INK PRESS)
    2. Proof of Minister Certification in YOUR NAME!!
    3. SHIPPING IS FREE!!! ***********************************************************************
    LIMITED TIME OFFER: ORDER TODAY! SEND Only $29.95 US (CREDIT CARD, CASH, CHECK, OR MONEY ORDER) SHIPPING IS FREE!!! For Shipping OUTSIDE the US please add $11.00. To place your order merely fill out the following form and fax to 1-775-243-7201. If this line is busy, please try faxing to 1-775-245-4553. or mail to: Internet Information Services PO Box 1542 Billings, MT 59103-0084 (ALL ORDERS FILLED WITHIN 24 HOURS OF RECEIVING THEM) *Please allow 8 days to receive your certificate by mail. If you do not receive your order within 10 days, please send us a fax letting us know of the late arrival. We will then contact you to figure out why you have not received your order.

    (not to be taken too seriously)
    DHK
     
  2. Revelator

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    While that may be legal....It is no candle to hte true light and calling from God. I believe God calls men to be preachers not men calling a company.
    You got that through e-mail... [​IMG] thats odd..hope I never do, if I do they would get a little scripture back. :D
     
  3. rlvaughn

    rlvaughn
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    Mr. Simpson's "ordinations" are almost unworthy to be addressed. But one common misconception many people have is that one must be an ordained minister to perform many of the functions he mentions. I am not familiar with all state laws, but I do not believe that MOST require ordination to perform these functions. Our state does not - not even weddings.
     
  4. TomVols

    TomVols
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    Rlvaughn,
    As you pointed out, states vary. Some require only that you claim ordination. I've performed weddings in at least two states that did not ask for an ordination certificate or anything. Two required ordination and then extra things (A state license, being bonded by a property owner, etc.) And you're right in that licenses are typically not required for funerals or that kind of thing.
     

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