How would your congregation & leaders treat these situations?

Discussion in 'Free-For-All Archives' started by Abiyah, Sep 24, 2003.

  1. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    Please state your church affiliation.

    (1)
    A man divorces his wife and leaves her and the
    children. He enters a relationship with a woman
    but never marries her. He repents, his ex-wife
    and children forgive him, and he hopes to
    remarry her in the near future. Can he attend your
    church, where his family attends?

    (2)
    Same situation as above, but the relationship he
    had was with another male.

    (3)
    Same situation as #1, but he married the second
    woman, divorced her, and wants to remarry his
    first wife.
     
  2. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    Torah-observant

    (1) yes
    (2) yes
    (3) no
     
  3. Frank

    Frank
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    New Testament Christian:
    1. yes
    2. yes
    3. yes
     
  4. A_Christian

    A_Christian
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    Fundamentalist Christian Bible believer:

    1) Yes
    2) Yes
    3) No

    He could fellowship with a body of believers;
    however, as a divorced man he could not
    marry again. However, I believe that the
    former wife would be free to marry another
    Christian man.
     
  5. WPutnam

    WPutnam
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    Catholic

    YES
    YES
    YES

    But it would be most advisable that the man attend Mass at another parish! Also, and it really goes without saying, a good visit to the confessional, a good retreat to sort out one's life, and a purposeful resolve to never commit such a terrible sin again.

    God bless,

    PAX

    Bill+†+


    Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, and let not
    thine heart be glad when he stumbleth:
    Lest the LORD see it, and it displease him, and he turn
    away his wrath from him.

    Proverbs 24:17-18
     
  6. tragic_pizza

    tragic_pizza
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    PC(USA)

    Yes to all of the above.
     
  7. Abiyah

    Abiyah
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    This is, by no means, a criticism but a matter of
    curiosity on my part: In the case of a married
    person divorcing the first spouse, marrying
    another, divorcing that one, then remarrying the
    first again not be a problem in your churches,
    because of the Scripture forbidding that?
     
  8. Taufgesinnter

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    Anabaptist. Sadly, the only churches available to me of my affiliation while I'm living here at school are liberal and accept divorce and remarriage. So I'll answer your questions as if I were still a member of my former church, which is quite conservative and does not permit anyone to join who is living in a state of divorce-and-remarriage.

    1. Yes, because he has been married to his wife all along. The state recognizes divorce as ending a marriage but God doesn't.

    2. Yes, in both scenarios he has repented.

    3. See #1. The second marriage was only recognized by the government. To God, it was a state of adultery of which the man has repented. He has been married to his real wife the whole time.

    My old church had a similar situation. It does not permit anyone to become a member who is divorced and remarried. A man whose wife left him and divorced him went ahead and married someone else until he realized that he was actually only living in adultery because his irrevocable marriage vows had been for life. He divorced the woman with whom he'd been living in adultery and has remained celibate in the following decades, and if his real wife were ever to choose to leave her current "husband" and reconcile with him, he'd do so by biblical command. If it were not for a quirk of his theology, he'd be welcome to join the church because he had been divorced against his will then remarried in ignorance but came to repentance. Since he is not living in a state of adultery now, he'd be accepted. Only due to a doctrinal disagreement in another area, he has never joined but has faithfully attended for years.
     
  9. Taufgesinnter

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    I know of no such NT Scripture. Jesus was very specific that anyone who divorces a spouse and marries another is continuously committing adultery against the spouse. That can only occur when the divorced spouse is still married to the real one. Jesus' words prohibit under the NT polygamy (as well as serial monogamy, unless a marriage is dissolved, which is only by death).

    Under the OT, divorce and remarriage were permitted, and so was going to war, swearing oaths, men covering their heads in prayer, and even union of church and state. These are not allowed under the NT.
     
  10. DHK

    DHK
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    Perhaps you should rephrase your question, or did you mean it this way?
    Anyone can attend our church. We had a person who was a member of the church of Satan attend our church once. Anyone can come in and attend. Our doors are open. But not anyone cane become a member.
    DHK
     
  11. tragic_pizza

    tragic_pizza
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    You didn't ask if I liked or agreed with how the denomination stands on these things.
     
  12. WPutnam

    WPutnam
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    So long as the first marriage is valid in the eyes of the Catholic Church, no divorce will break it, not even the state can absolve it except legally.

    Therefore, in your scenario, the individual can return to his first wife, since he has never ceased to be married to her in the first place! The only way that marriage bond can be broken is by death of one of the spouses!

    No "remarriage" would even be necessary! He would simply return to her, assuming that his real wife takes him back, of course.

    If she doesn't, the man is obliged not to attempt a second marriage...

    And it is for that reason that when I searched for a suitable wife, I did so very, very carefully.

    I found her too!

    A deeply religious Catholic woman I searched for and found her, and it was no easy matter to convince her of me either...which is the way it should be.

    It teaches the serious Catholic what committment is all about. If you do not want to commit to a woman to be your wife for the rest of your life, you have no business dating her any longer.

    Thank God I found a good woman as a wife! We have been married for 44 years with 6 adult children and 15 grandchildren! (two more on the "building ways" in Naval parlance.) [​IMG]

    And that is what God wants marriage to be...

    And I count my blessings that mine is that way...

    God bless,

    PAX

    Bill+†+


    - Anima Christi -

    Soul of Christ, sanctify me.
    Body of Christ, save me.
    Blood of Christ, inebriate me.
    Water from the side of Christ, wash me.
    Passion of Christ, strengthen me.
    O good Jesus, hear me;
    Within Thy wounds hide me and permit
    me not to be separated from Thee.
    From the Wicked Foe defend me.
    And bid me to come to Thee,
    That with Thy Saints I may praise Thee,
    For ever and ever. Amen.
     
  13. Smaug067

    Smaug067
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    A man can return to his first wife in any circumstance except if he divorces her, marries another, and then divorces the second wife. At this point, marrying the first wife again is an abomination in the sight of the Lord.

    Smaug
     

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