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I Hate Divorce

Discussion in '2004 Archive' started by Dr. Bob, Mar 13, 2004.

  1. Dr. Bob

    Dr. Bob Administrator
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    Lots of rhetoric in the General Forum, but thought this a better place to discuss the theology of the issue.

    God condemns the behavior of the Jews returning from exile.
    God hates divorce. Bob hates divorce. In 34+ years pastoral ministry, I have seen only 2 cases of "exception" (according to Jesus/Paul). That is not much of an exception.

    And just finished lunch and found that a close family friend is getting a divorce after nearly 20 years (and kids). She "fell in love" with a deacon in their church who was holding home Bible studies, etc etc etc.

    MADE ME HATE DIVORCE EVEN MORE (to say nothing of that Baptist deacon . . ).

    Okay, enough venting. I'd like to start with this verse - does God HATE putting away and dealing treacherously with our wives?

    Let's leave the other verses (Matt 5, I Cor) out of it for now. Please.
     
  2. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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  3. Jim Ward

    Jim Ward New Member

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  4. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Yes, for God and ME. We've been married 34 years also.

    Diane and Jim
     
  5. Grasshopper

    Grasshopper Active Member
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    Jer 3:8 And I saw, when, for this very cause that backsliding Israel had committed adultery, I had put her away and given her a bill of divorcement, yet treacherous Judah her sister feared not; but she also went and played the harlot.

    Interesting that God divorced the 10 Northern tribes.
     
  6. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
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    I think God does hate divorce, but I am not sure that is what Malachi 2 is saying. The Hebrew text is probably better rendered as "He who hates so as to put away." Check the ESV for this. I think the NET also has it but someone woudl have to check ...
     
  7. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    Jesus said that Moses "permitted" divorce because of the "hardness of your heart"---but that from the beginning it was not so.

    One thing comes to mind--about the "leading cause" of divorce---and it comes from what Jesus said---"because of the hardness of your heart"---and we need to ask ourselves the question here--

    Jesus was teaching on divorce--and reference was made to Moses and to hard hearts---Now, the thing about the Hebrews is----they were leaving Egypt---it took them forty years to actually LEAVE Egypt--calculating that Moses fled to the Midian desert and stays there forty years before returning---

    but here's the clue---when they actually left Egypt---it took them forty more years to get Egypt out of them---see??

    And one of the things they carried out of Egypt---were "hearts like Pharoah"---remember that Pharoah was the one with the hard heart---when couples divorce---its because somebody was facing somebody with a hard heart---thats one reason that God hates it---its because divorce is a picture of Pharoah! God wants marriages to be a picture of Him---see??
     
  8. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
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    I don't know blackbird ... it seems that God hating divorce has nothing to do with Pharoah ... at least in Scripture. I think there are plenty of reasons that God hates divorce without Pharoah being a part of the picture.
     
  9. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    Brother Larry---the reason I had Pharoah thrown in there was in Jesus' reference to Moses' permitting divorce---mainly because of the "Hardness" of the heart---and the same reference can be said of Pharoah's heart being hardened---

    Marriage was intended all along to show the love relationship the Father has for His son---and divorce is a mockery of that picture and a revelation of a type heart that Pharoah had---see??
     
  10. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
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    I see what you are saying. But "hardness of heart" describes the sin condition of all men. It is not just Pharoah. It is all who will not obey the Scripture. My point was that Scripture never connects "hardness of heart in divorce" and "Pharoah" together. Therefore, I question whether we should. I think there is plenty to say about it without making that connection.
     
  11. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
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    The other thing I would go easy on is the "Picture of the Father and the Son" or "the father and us." Scripture says that the purpose of marriage was "so that man would not be alone" and "so that you should raise up a godly offspring." Again, I don't see a great scriptural emphasis that marriage is a picture of the relationship between the Father and the Son. There is a teaching that marriage reflects the relationship between Christ and the church, but even that is a mystery as Paul says.
     
  12. Daniel David

    Daniel David New Member

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    God absolutely hates it. People that go through it hate it. The children involved hate it. The inlaws hate it.

    The only ones who don't hate it are the lawyers and deadbeat spouses that cheat and then use it for their own wickedness.
     
  13. Daniel David

    Daniel David New Member

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    I don't think anyone will argue this point. I think the real difference is when people bring in remarriage.
     
  14. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
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    That is probably true, DD. All though there are some people who say that there is no such thing as divorce. I don't understand that position at all. I think this is the position of Carl Laney and some others. His name comes to my mind.
     
  15. David Mark

    David Mark New Member

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    I hate it too.
     
  16. vaspers

    vaspers New Member

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    I think God loves divorce...

    ...when the husband, for example, is beating up his wife, and spending lots of money on alcohol and drugs and prostitutes, and sexually molesting and physically abusing the children.

    God would probably like that man to die of a heart attack if he will never repent of his sins.

    Can I not bring up the fact that adultery is a just cause for divorce?

    Wouldn't violent physical abuse and child molesting be a Christian reason for divorce?

    It seems insane and satanic to tell the wife to hang in there babe.

    My parents fought a lot and we kids were terrorized by drunkeness and violence and vile talking. One brother became schizophrenic.

    So I have no great love for forced marriage when horrible things are going on within it and people are suffering horrendously. There are higher considerations to weigh in on this.

    What if the husband becomes a terrorist or satan worshipper. No divorce? Help me understand why.

    God hates polygamy...but look at those OT people who had multiple wives and concubines. Weird.


    [​IMG] :( :eek: [​IMG]
     
  17. HeDied4U

    HeDied4U Well-Known Member
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    Daniel David said...

    I couldn't agree with you more, except on the in-law part (my ex mother-in-law was very happy when her daughter divorced me). I know I made many mistakes during my marriage, but even in the end I was willing to try to work things out, but she said she was through with me. Even though my son was only a little over two at the time, he probably wondered what happened to daddy being around all the time.

    Yes, I'm sure God hates divorce, and so do I. That's why I'm doing my best to make sure it works this time around. I don't want my heart ripped out again, and I know I don't want to rip out my wife's heart.

    God Bless!

    Adam
     
  18. following-Him

    following-Him Active Member

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    Amen Adam,

    Divorce is ugly. It is also painful and so distructive. Our daughter was recently divorced by her husband after less than 3 years of marriage. Actually, it was his mother who wanted the divorce. I still don't think ex-son-in-law knows what he wants, but after 30 years + the cord still hasn't been cut. Divorce invariably effects more than the couple splitting up. Maybe marriage is made too easy, and people can marry too young? OK, so I was 18 when I married. We are just coming up for our 31st anniversary, but a lot of people take the view that divorce is always an option if it "doesn't work out". What a sad, unhappy and godless society we live in. I love my husband very much. When we married it was for always. I wouldn't change it even though it hasn't always been easy, even though I have almost lost him twice to illness. Couples have to learn to talk to each other rather their respective divorce lawyers.

    Sheila
     
  19. Chet

    Chet New Member

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    Pastor Larry Said
    Pastor Larry, I remember when you brought this up in the translation forum. I checked this out then and remember reading some on it. I’ve had it in the back of my mind, thinking about it from time to time. I know you understand the Hebrew, and I do not, but it just does not seem to fit the context the way the ESV has it. I checked out the NET to see how they translated it. I will paste it, and following will be their footnote on the text.

     
  20. GODzThunder

    GODzThunder New Member

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    I know that I hate divorce. Both my wife and I were products of divorced families. My parents divorced when I was twelve and my wife's family divorced a few years ago. In both of our lives there has been nothing but conflict and strife. Now that we have a child of our own things have gotten "awkard" at Christmas and other various holidays. Divorce hurts children more than it hurts those splitting. I personally think that divorce is a cowards way out of a problem between a couple. (in the sense of one spouse beating the other, I think that a man beating a woman it is the man who is the true coward taking out frustration of his own life out on others rather than being a man and confronting his inner demons).
     
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