Pastors, sexual hurt and sin

Discussion in 'Pastoral Ministries' started by Pastor G, Apr 3, 2006.

  1. Pastor G

    Pastor G
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    As a child of nine, I was sexually abused for five months resulting in 20 years of spiritual darkness, emotional confusion and relational dysfunction.

    Why 20 years and no healing? I am a Baptist pastor and who does the pastor tell when he is hurt...especially in this way.

    The way out of the darkness? Tell a trusted friend. That's how I got out...you can, too.

    Check out my website www.abstinencepastor.org

    Now, not only has God healed me, he has given me my marriage and family back and a great new ministry!
     
  2. James_Newman

    James_Newman
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    God is good, pastor G! My marriage has been affected by sexual abuse and sexual sin, but God has been restoring my marriage and it is stronger now than it ever was. I have to give Him all the glory for it, because I can do nothing with out Him.
     
  3. Pastor G

    Pastor G
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    James,

    This is so great to hear.

    How did God begin to put your life back together? It took my wife telling me she was going to take the kids if things didn't change. I was going through cycles of depression and she had all she could take. Praise God he moved and still does. Keep me updated!
     
  4. James_Newman

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    My wife had been molested as a child, and this has, I think, been the root of a lot of her emotional trials. I won't go into any gory details here in public. I think you can find my testimony in the mens private forum, but I will say that my wife and I were about to divorce and I was ready and willing to chuck it all. But I realized that the situation between my wife and I was affecting our 3 year old son very badly. My parents divorced when I was about 13 and after that my father basically vanished from my life, and I didn't want my son to have to go down the same paths that I went down, not having a father to guide me. I prayed and God brought me to repentence and suffice to say, my wife and I have been back together for over two years and God just continues to bless us. We now have a new baby girl to go with our 6 yr old boy. [​IMG]
     
  5. Major B

    Major B
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    My wife and I have a bi-vocational counseling ministry; we see 12-13 cases a week, sometimes single people, sometimes couples.

    The issue of sexual abuse comes up in over half our cases as one of the factors. Pornography also is a "frequent flyer" in the devastation of lives. Physical abuse, and parents with alcohol or drug habits round out the top four.

    I have learned that when people have a permanently negative attitude, are angry tyrants in their own homes, are reclusive and withdrawn, or are obsessed with sexual things, that one or more (or, horribly, all four) of the above were present in their homes growing up.

    We have also learned, from people who have come to us as a "last resort," that neither psychology nor any mixture of psycho-babble and Christianity can heal anyone long term.

    There is healing in Christ and His Word, but never in secular psychology or any type of Christian Psychology.
     
  6. Pastor G

    Pastor G
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    I feel the church is so crippled from sexual abuse and sin that it has stolen from us our spiritual vitality. I believe this evident most in our evangelism "efforts." I have some questions...

    Christ is living in us but is he living through us?

    Christ is living in us, but because of the sexual hurt and sin, do we really believe it?

    Are we so hurt that the world can't see Christ high and lifted up? Is this the reason people aren't being drawn to him?

    Is the problem so large inside the church that we can't see it within ourselves or the world?

    I know this is a lot to consider, but I believe we have a hugh problem and we don't know how to address it, as a body.

    I'd love to have a national discussion on this!
     

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