YOU KNOW YOU'RE A MISSIONARY KID WHEN. You can't answer the question, "Where are you from?" You speak two languages, but can't spell either. You flew before you could walk. You embarrass yourself by asking what swear words mean. ***You have a passport, but no driver's license. You watch National Geographic specials and recognise someone. You have a time zone map next to your telephone. You don't know how to play Pac-Man. You would rather eat seaweed than cafeteria food. Your life story uses the phrase "Then we went to..." five times. You speak to different ethnic groups in their own language. You think in grams, metres, and litres. You speak with authority on the quality of airline travel. ***You send your family peanut butter and Kool-Aid for Christmas. You worry about fitting in, and wear a native wrap around the dorm. National Geographic makes you homesick. You have strong opinions about how to cook bugs. You live at school, work in the tropics, and go home for vacation. ***You don't know where home is. Strangers say they can remember you when you were "this tall." ***You have friends from or in 29 different countries. [maybe not quite 29] You do your devotions in another language. ***You sort your friends by continent. You keep dreaming of a green Christmas. You tell people where you're from, and their eyes get big. ***You are grateful for the speed and efficiency of any postal service. ***You realise that furlough is not a vacation. ***You wince when people mispronounce foreign words. ***You've spoken in dozens of churches, but aren't a pastor. Furlough means that you are stuffed every night... and have to eat it all to seem polite. Your parents decline your cousin's offer to let them use his BMW, and stuff all six of you into an old VW Beetle instead. You stockpile mangoes. You know what REAL coffee tastes like. The majority of your friends don't speak English as a first language. Someone brings up the name of a team, and you get the sport wrong. You believe vehemently that football is played with a round, spotted ball. You know there is no such thing as an international language. You know the difference between patriotism and nationalism. ***You realise what a small world it is, after all. ***You never take anything for granted. You watch a movie set in a foreign country, and you know what the nationals are REALLY saying into the camera. ***You know how to pack. All preaching sounds better under a corrugated tin roof. Having four distinct seasons other than: dry, very dry,rainy, very rainy, is a new experience. After a couple of years in one spot, you're ready to move again. ***You frequently say, "I don't know, I was out of the country." You feel uncomfortable in school without a uniform. School gets cancelled due to flash flooding. Tropical fruits aren't imported. Walking miles to and from school is "normal." If someone asks what school you went to, you reply, "depends on the year." You are afraid to ask what you are eating. But munch away,with a smile on your face.