Youth Directives

Discussion in 'Youth Forum' started by SaggyWoman, Aug 24, 2008.

  1. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman
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    What do you do with your 18 year old who is still in high school when you give them a directive (put up your coat, turn down your radio, etc.) and they don't comply?

    If you have rules, such as going to school every day unless sick, and they chose to not go to school because they don't want to, what do you do?

    How do you enforce your rules?
     
  2. SBCPreacher

    SBCPreacher
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    1. The coat. Warn them, then take it to a homeless shelter.

    2. The radio. Warn them, then go to the breaker box and turn the power off to their room. Or, unplug it and cut the cord (yes, unplug it first!).

    3. Not going to school. Warn them first. Since their 18, tell them to go get a job, because the rent starts next month.

    If parents don't deal with these issues before the kind is 18, there's not much you can do.
     
  3. rdwhite

    rdwhite
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    Amen, SBCPreacher!

    It is your house for which you are paying all the bills. If they do not wish to respect you, and abide by the rules you have set, then it is time for them to move out and really be independent. That is a rebellious and dishonorable spirit and it should be dealt with quickly. Not in a mean or vengeful manner; with love and justice, firm and resolute.

    Grace to the humble, Law to the proud.
     
  4. FriendofSpurgeon

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    I think that's the key. Also key is the relationship. If you don't have a relationship with your kids by the time they're teens, then look for rough waters ahead.

    Our expectation is that if we ask them to do something, they do it. Certain things are negotiable. Certain things are not. Personally, I don't get whacked out over not picking up a coat.

    Also, as our kids are getting older, we are moving from a "yes/no" and "do this/that because I said so" to more of a mentor/coach. They will be in college soon and they need to make wise decisions on their own.
     
  5. Salty

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    I would also check with my lawyer! Depending on what State or Commonwealth you live in - you could be in big trouble by "giving away" your sons items, or cutting a cord, or demanding rent - yes even if they are 18.

    Hey, I agree with the tactics, but is it worth going to jail (literally) over?

    Salty
     
  6. securityofficer2008

    securityofficer2008
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    It is a sad day in America, when you have to consult your lawyer before you discipline your children.

    I would tell my 18 year old to abide by my rules or leave. It is as simple as that. This would have to be done in the right spirit, of course. You do not want this to start a knock-out fight between you and your child. I would recommend that you use it to show the seriousness of your "laws" that you are laying down.

    When it comes to discipline it should be the parent running the home and not the child. It should be a "it's my way or the highway" kind of situation.
     
  7. Berean

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    This Problem should have been dealt with @ 18 mos not 18 yrs. I am sure it didn't just all of a sudden appear.
     

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