Deadbeat Dads

[Marooncat79]

The truth is

no one wins in divorce

not the kids and nor either parent unless something horrendous has gone on

 

[canadyjd]

……
if I remember correctly you are willing to give more grace to those on death row than to single dads struggling…...

I have no power to “give grace” to anyone, though I would not support the death penalty for deadbeat dads.

Murderers shouldn’t murder, and face the consequences when they do.

Dads should pay their child support and face the consequences if they don’t.

peace to you

 

[JonC]

I have no power to “give grace” to anyone, though I would not support the death penalty for deadbeat dads.

Murderers shouldn’t murder, and face the consequences when they do.

Dads should pay their child support and face the consequences if they don’t.

peace to you

The problem is we live in a culture of entitlement without responsibility. People want to do what they want without consequence.

 

[canadyjd]

Wait are we talking about a specific situation? I thought we were being general?

This was a hypothetical case, not a specific person.

peace to you

 

[canadyjd]

According to one set of figures from the internet, about 68% of the dads ordered to financially support their kids do so. The rest, 32% are dead beats. However only about 57% of the moms ordered to financially support their kids do so. The rest, 43% are dead beats. So it would seem no matter the gender, depravity can be found within the hearts of all.

Without any reference to your source, I’m going to posit the overall numbers would show women get custody far more often than men and the men are ordered to pay child support at a far greater percentage.

The smaller number of women being ordered to pay support might bias the percentages.

peace to you

 

[Salty]

The mom raising her children without help from the deadbeat dad needs peace as well. The reality she faces every day of being forced onto government assistance, food stamps etc., to survive, so taxpayers are paying what the deadbeat dad should be paying.

If I find one, I’ll tell him to pay his child support. Get another job if you have to.

Personally, I would pray they reconcile. But if not, then take responsibility and pay up.

Since you decided to comment after all, I’ll ask again. You stated there are valid reasons the dad doesn’t pay support. Please give a couple. ...

Some of the other responses have mentioned some things.

But your response - still indicates a very closed mind - so even if I gave you a response -you probably wouldn't accept anyways.

So I recommend you do what Rev Mitchell said - find some of these so called deadbeats - get to know them -minister to them - B4 they commit suicide! (that's right - you did not address them.)


Granted - there are true deadbeats - but there are men (and a few women) who are caught up in a system in which they can not get ahead. --- and yes -I am personally aware of parents having full custody - but had to send money to the non-custodial parent. Yes - FACT!

I wish I could find the cassette tape (yep long time ago) of a talk show I hosted in which I had 3 divorced dads - on Christmas Eve . I started the show by stating, My three guests tonight will not be seeing their young kids tomorrow on Christmas Day - not because they dont want to but.....

 

[Salty]

NOTE: I tried to hit reply - but did not work - thus my copy and paste from post 25/

canadyjd said: Without any reference to your source, I’m going to posit the overall numbers would show women get custody far more often than men and the men are ordered to pay child support at a far greater percentage.


and that is true - but I thought that feminists want equality - Shouldn't judges order that 50% of cases - the kids go to dad? (give or take a small %)

 

[Salty]

Actually What I would like to see:

The kids get the house (of course - parents pay the bill)
One parent gets the kids from 5-15th
the other parents gets the kids the 15-25
the first parent gets the kids 25-5
The other parent gets the kids the next 5-15

Switch over happens at Noon - (which normally kids are in school)
By making the changeover on the 5's - both parents get the kids on Christmas Day
Both parents will live in the house for the 10 days they have custody.
But what if one parent gets remarried - well - they will have to work it out.

On parent will be ordered to pay the rent - the other pay utilities - on an equal basis.......

 

[Van]

Without any reference to your source, I’m going to posit the overall numbers would show women get custody far more often than men and the men are ordered to pay child support at a far greater percentage.

The smaller number of women being ordered to pay support might bias the percentages.

peace to you

Yes, more men are required to pay support, but the sample size included tens of thousands of dead beat moms.

 

[canadyjd]

Some of the other responses have mentioned some things.

But your response - still indicates a very closed mind - so even if I gave you a response -you probably wouldn't accept anyways.....

Well, there you go. You think my mind is closed, which is why you won’t give a couple of those “valid reasons” fathers don’t support their kids.

More likely, you realize how pathetic the excuses for non support will sound if you say it out loud.

Oh well, hard to “debate” if you won’t plainly state what you believe.

FTR, I have acknowledged the devastation divorce has on all members of the family. I understand that, for most fathers, paying support creates financial hardship.

However, the hardships goes both ways and fathers have a responsibility to provide care for their children, regardless of how hard it is.

Id rather see the grown man dealing with the “hardships” so their children don’t have to deal with the hardships.

peace to you

 

[Reynolds]

Dead best moms are not rare, some dads like anyone else face financial crisis that only gives them enough to live. It can often be difficult to pull out of it due to lack of skills, experience, and training. It’s not that some don’t want to support their children but they do not have the means.

even married people experience such crisis. Be careful of broad brushes.

Exactly. The system favors the mother. Where the father is a fit parent, joint custody should be awarded and no child support required of the Father. It is wrong to take the kids away from the father and require him to fund their upbringing.
The system is antiquated. Mother gets kids and house. Father gets bill for kids and house. Totally unjust!!!!

 

[canadyjd]

…..
The system is antiquated. Mother gets kids and house. Father gets bill for kids and house. Totally unjust!!!!

Petition your representatives at the state level to change the laws. Until then, dads pay up and quit making excuses.

peace to you

 

[Revmitchell]

Petition your representatives at the state level to change the laws. Until then, dads pay up and quit making excuses.

peace to you

prove they are just making excuses

 

[canadyjd]

prove they are just making excuses

If they don’t pay, that is proof they are making excuses.

peace to you

 

[Revmitchell]

If they don’t pay, that is proof they are making excuses.

peace to you

Uh no it’s not

 

[Revmitchell]

There are plenty of men and women who are making no real effort to care for their children. Men are not alone in this.

There are also plenty of parents that are struggling to make ends meet and are doing what they know and can to get it done and still not always putting enough food on the table or getting the clothes they need.

 

[Salty]

Petition your representatives at the state level to change the laws. Until then, dads pay up and quit making excuses.......

why do you refuse to include deadbeat moms.???
Until you start conceding at least a few of the things we have mentioned - there is no sense in saying anthing else.
And I personaly know of one individual who had a very valid reason for NOT pay his so called child support.

 

[canadyjd]

why do you refuse to include deadbeat moms.???
Until you start conceding at least a few of the things we have mentioned - there is no sense in saying anthing else.
And I personaly know of one individual who had a very valid reason for NOT pay his so called child support.

What was the “valid” reason to not pay child support.

peace to you

 

[canadyjd]

why do you refuse to include deadbeat moms.???
Until you start conceding at least a few of the things we have mentioned - there is no sense in saying anthing else.
And I personaly know of one individual who had a very valid reason for NOT pay his so called child support.

There are some deadbeat moms and they should pay their child support.

peace to you