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COMMON GROUND COFFEE HOUSE #82

Discussion in 'Free-For-All Archives' started by I Am Blessed 24, Jul 9, 2005.

  1. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Sue, there should have been a survey included with your title policy when you bought the property. There also may still be metal posts marking the corner points. If you don't have a copy of your survey, most of the time they are recorded with the deeds/mortgage at the courthouse and won't take a whole lot to get a copy of.

    Round here, what your neighbor is doing is called harassment. Sometimes these activities are covered under antistalking laws(things like pulling out your plants). If he thinks that you have something on his property it is up to him to PROVE it or keep his mouth shut and his hands to himself. Next time he threatens you(even acts threatening) or destroys your property, you do the police calling. Pulling out plants is called vandalism! (can you tell I hate bullies?)

    Btw, I agree with Diane, you've had more than your share here lately. Feel free to vent.

    Continuing to pray for Dale....

    Dennis seems to have stalled out a bit over south Alabama. We still haven't had more than a nice steady rain. The weatherman says it is going to get here, but then he has been saying that all day. Now he says the worst will pass west of us. I really haven't been able to figure out how the winds can be so bad south, east and west of us but we're not getting it here. Strange weather.

    I'll be very glad when it moves on through. Son has had a migraine since yesterday because of the unsettled weather.
     
  2. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Good morning everyone!

    Can't believe I was last out this last night and first in this morning! Oh well, I've put on the coffee and only drunk half the pot, so ya'll enjoy!

    Sue, I have to say that upon consideration, my opinion on what to do about your neighbor was probably wrong. It will be better to not escalate matters by bringing in the police UNLESS you really do feel physically threatened. If you do, bring them in immediately. If this guy is anything but an annoying loudmouth, you need to document(and make police reports) or the antistalking laws can't be applied.

    However, if he is just an annoying loudmouth, you are a better witness to him if you continue to be kind and peaceful.

    Dennis has left us wet and breezy but not much else here in my area that we can tell. It's so early that I haven't from folks I know around town. I do know that the power hasn't even blinked here. Somehow, our little town, even though we were only about fifty miles from the center as it passed, was spared most of the bad stuff. Right this minute, Georgia is getting hit with thunderstorms from Dennis and here it is just dark and wet. Not even raining at the moment(yes!)
     
  3. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24 Active Member

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    Good morning all:

    Cindi: This guy is in his late 20's, early 30's and lives with his parents. He does not even own the property. He has a terrible temper and his parents have a mental disorder and are afraid of him, so there is no help there. I can remember when I lived in the next block and had a police scanner, the police were called to their house quite often for domestic violence.

    I would be more than happy to move all the landscape concrete, etc. over a few inches just to shut him up, but none of us are in a physical shape to do that right now and won't be for several weeks.

    I am going to try and locate a copy of a survey today. We really can't afford to hire a surveyor, but the neighbor said if we don't have one, he will tear the fence down...

    Well, it looks like my Bronchitis is going to act up (it is stress induced). I dreamt about the guy next door pulling up my bushes!

    I am going out to water the garden (and bushes if they're still there), then wake Brent up, feed him breakfast, and take off for Springfield to visit Dale.

    I'm not sure when I'll be back, but will check in when I get home.

    HAGD!
    §ue
     
  4. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Well then Sue, you may not have a choice but to call the police. He can't just tear the fence down. He would have to take you to court first and usually guys like this don't have the funds to do it.

    So the very next time he destroys moves, touches, or threatens you, call the police and make a report. If he is speaking to you civilly, tell him that you believe you are in the right and if he thinks differently it will be up to him to prove it in a court of law.

    Sounds like this guy is a real bully and it will take outside interference to make him stop. You must, must, must, document everything with a date and time of the incidence, even if it is to small a thing to call the police out for(like the plant). You documentation will show a pattern of his behaviour if it ever goes so far as a court of law. (experience with Alabama laws only here, but documentation helps greatly in these kinds of cases) If you can get photo or video of him in action, that is even better documentation. Make sure you cameras are set to the correct date/time.

    I hate you are going through this, but rest assured that you are not the one with the problem.. This guy is probably soooo unhappy that he lives to make others unhappy too. What an awful way to spend ones life.

    I'll continue to pray and pray some more!
     
  5. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    Padre---Blackbird is a nickname I(I mean, he) inherited in High School----he can also be the board's "sinister" :D or on the other hand---the board's "saint"!!----just all depends . . .!!!
    [​IMG]

    As far as Diane having a picture of Blackbird----that's impossible----Blackbird will swear in a kangaroo court of law that that is NOT him there with his wife and kid---but rather---that is Blackbird's "Alias"----to which Blackbird's "Alias" will also swear in the same kangaroo court that he does not know the whereabouts of Blackbird---as Blackbird was absent when the picture was taken!!!

    See?????
     
  6. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Now do NOT go ballistic on me for using this 'translation' but I felt Sue needed encouragement today and sometimes the 'pretty reading' versions just fit the need.

    Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. 2 We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. He was willing to die a shameful death on the cross because of the joy he knew would be his afterward. Now he is seated in the place of highest honor beside God's throne in heaven. 3 Think about all he endured when sinful people did such terrible things to him, so that you don't become weary and give up.

    I've asked my prayer warrior friends to pray for a hedge of protection around you and Brent as well as your property and updated them on Dale's blood sugar and being moved out of ICU.

    It's still raining here but the sun is trying to break through. I've got the C/A on but set high. It's only low 70's° outside but the humidty is so thick. I had a headache for two days and bet it was the barometric pressure! Never thought of that!

    I have decided that I have to start doing things I enjoy again. Certainly I could find a few minutes to work in the flower beds or read. I feel like time is rushing by and I'm not enjoying myself at all.

    Diane
     
  7. Wife of One

    Wife of One New Member

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    Sue you do have one more corse of action. You can call Social Services. If his parents are mentally ill and cannot take care of themselves and he is thier care giver and is abusing them. Or , has a history of abuse. They will intercede. You would be looking out for them and yourself. Elder abuse happens. I'll check in later. Oh and sue, you can remain annomyus.
     
  8. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    What an odd day I'm having. Kids coming and going and coming back. [​IMG] Ty at 5:45 but then he had a nightmare so came screaming to my room at 6:30. MacKenzie, Brayden and Kelsey came at 10:15 but MacKenzie had a doctor's appt. so Dad took her and brought her back at 11:45. An emergency child care need for a neighbors friend came up and Monica (7) came at 1:30 and will be here only a few hours. I've got 2 sleeping and the Cook's man came. Jon is on vacation all week and has been in and out. LOLOL

    The older kids just had snacks and are watching a movie in the rec room and the baby is playing with cars here with me. It's almost time to wake Ty and MacKenzie and give them snacks.

    Glad I got a lot done this weekend!
    Diane
     
  9. AVL1984

    AVL1984 <img src=../ubb/avl1984.jpg>

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    Afternoon all:

    Just checking in to let you all know that we're home from the funeral and to ask for continued prayer. We found that there is no legal binding will, and there is a huge fight in the making between the oldest sister and the uncle who is "executor" over statements he's made about the insurance money, the kids and their mother. I don't physically have the energy to go into a lot of detail, but it may end up in the courts in a few weeks.

    Also, please pray for me...I go to the neuro surgeon on Wendesday afternoon. The spinal epidurel didn't do very well, so I will probably have surgery.

    Praying for ya'll.

    T
     
  10. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Ah, Tony, sure will. Isn't it awful how people fight over 'stuff'? When Jim's grandmother moved into a retirement home, there were fights, fights over stuff! We didn't go. When all was said and done, Grandma's old typewriter and handcrank adding machine (REALLY OLD STUFF) was left. Jim had spent much of his childhood in her home and Grandma worked 2 and 3 jobs to help support his family since his Dad was hospitalized with polio. Jim fell asleep hearing her typing or doing someone's books on her adding machine. Those meant the world to him. [​IMG]
    [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  11. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Dear Tony,
    I'm sorry you are having to go through all of that. Surprising that the uncle and sister think that there is any executor without a binding will, or that they as sister and brother of your MIL would inherit anything without a will.

    You can go to www.findlaw.com and look up the TN code for intestate succession.
    Seems fairly clear that children or "issue" of the deceased inherit equally. Only if there is no issue of the deceased would brothers and sisters come in to inherit.
    Of course, you would need to actually consult an attorney for appropriate legal advice.

    Amazing how people both seem to know very little about the law and threaten various things just to see what they can get away with.
    Just make sure they don't leave you holding the bag for the funeral expenses now that the uncle has been added to the checking account!

    Karen
     
  12. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Dear Sue,
    Don't be shy!! Bake some choc. chip cookies and serve them to a couple of teenage boys from your church after you ask them to move stuff those few inches.
    You know all those people who say call me if I can do anything? Call a couple of them and borrow their sons' muscles for a few minutes!

    Karen
     
  13. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24 Active Member

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    Karen; We are building a new church ministry center and all the men and older boys with any free time are busy working on that. I already tried. :(

    I found a construction company that will do it for me, but I'm sure it will take all of the money we have - it has to be done though.

    Isn't it odd that the ones who offer help to everyone else never get any when they need it - or is that just OUR family? :confused:
     
  14. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    I was just about to agree with Karen. Our church youth has a doula group that will do anything for those who need help. There's also a men's group who have built new steps into elderly ladies homes, etc.

    Our www.freecycle.org has an 'odd jobs' sub page where people can look for help or offer to do odd jobs. I guess, tho, since you need a surveyor, you have to pay for someone who is 'licensed'?

    I saw these verses in a devotional and it made me think of your angry young neighbor! He needs to be into the Bible and not into the bottle!

    Psalms 37:8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret--it only causes harm.

    Ecclesiastes 7:9 Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, For anger rests in the bosom of fools.

    Luke 21:19 By your patience possess your souls.

    James 1:19 So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;

    Romans 5:3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance;
     
  15. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Sue, I take it that you haven't found a copy of your survey yet.

    I like Wife of One's suggestion that you contact your local social services. If this guy's parents are elderly and mentally ill and he is violent, they may NEED someone to step in and help them. That is what social services is for. I'd consider this even without the problems you are having with him. Elderly and mentally ill are often a target for abusers and abuse should never be tolerated just because it doesn't affect us.

    While I was looking through AL's property law for another matter, I happened upon the penalty for a person pulling out/cutting down someone else's plants. $15.00 per plant! Makes me wonder what Illinois has to say about it.
     
  16. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Cindi, I have a copy of our survey but the metal poles they sunk out front on one side has been pulled up by the children and on the other side, must be buried. I'd say this guy is looney enough that Sue needs him to SEE the surveyor's there and I'd STILL ask a police officer to be present when a copy is handed to the parents (who should be the owners of that property). He could come out and pull up the stakes the very first night and move then over.

    Isn't it awful that people can be like this?
     
  17. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24 Active Member

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    I have decided that I am installing the fence on THIS side of the posts that mark the boundary.

    If he wants it surveyed - let HIM hire a surveyor!

    Also, we are the only ones who still have the original brick sidewalk out front, everyone else has opted for a concrete walk. It stops on each end right where the old fence posts are so I feel safe putting a fence in there.

    The man who is installing it will be here at 7:00 in the morning to tell me how much he will charge.

    These people are not elderly (his parents). They are younger than I am. They have agoraphobia and don't go out of the house - ever. They are on welfare and receive food stamps and a medical card and also Social Security. I have never known either of them to work. The son gets their groceries, etc. I would be cutting off their lifeline if I reported him. I have not seen any signs of abuse since we've lived here, but I heard it on the scanner about 10 years ago, so they may be OK with whatever is going on.

    I'm going to lay down for a while. I have a splitting headache.
     
  18. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    Sue, I certainly admire the way you are handling this unfortunate situation.
     
  19. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Agree Thankful! I'd be sick to my stomach all the time and want to move! I can't stand fussing!!

    Well hubby is JUST starting home and there's 20 roads closed because of flooding or trees down so he's not sure when he'll get here. He'll be ready for bed by time he gets home. :(

    So, I was very good yesterday and ate only a tiny piece of fish for lunch with about 8 French Fries (baked). I had a small bowl of Frosted Shredded Wheat for supper. Today I've not eaten anything! I'm having tuna salad with a boiled egg on lettuce and tomato for supper. I WILL have a few crackers with it. I fed Nick hours ago. :eek:
     
  20. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    Good decision about the fence.

    Not sure about the parents, though. I guess though if they are recieving that much aid, someone should be checking on them at least occasionally. They could be the root of the Son's frustrations. He may feel so burdened by their care that he can't see a way to a life of his own. Sad situation all around.

    I hope your headache goes away soon!

    Diane, I had a kid day here too. Mine were wild from having to stay inside all weekend so the extra kids were kind of a relief! Precious was the odd man out today, her friends were elsewhere. Son graciously allowed her to play video games with his friend (nicknamed Second Son because he is here so often).

    I sent all of them home when we went out to karate at 4:30 so it was a fairly short day. They didn't get here till noon. I cooked spaghetti not long before we left, so I don't even have to cook this evening. I am making T some noodles as he has come in early and there aren't(isn't?) any left! Crazy kids ate the noodles plain and left the sauce.

    I need to sew or make blueberry preserves tonight, but I'm not sure I feel like doing either. It may just have to wait till morning. My neck's been aching lately and it's bothering greatly this evening.
     
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