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Do you believe in disciplining children

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Roguelet, Oct 17, 2005.

  1. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

  2. Ed Edwards

    Ed Edwards <img src=/Ed.gif>

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    I looked at the book: (quoted on this site):
    WAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT CHILD TRAINING
    I quit reading it when it started talking about
    120 pound adults beating 22 pound toddlers.
    How can you "Just make sure when you spank your
    children to be totally honest with them"
    with a toddler (under 2)?

    BTW, it seems this particular book is
    more about unfruitful parenting techniques
    and opinion than the Bible.
     
  3. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    Looking at the book ( which I am sure you checked out websites online and not the actual book which is over 300 pages long )and reading it is not the same. I have a hard time believing you went to a book store and ordered it in the last few days which is usually what you have to do since most book stores do not keep it in stock. I know I have given about 10 copies away.

    The book never condones beatings and it uses more scripture than any parenting book I have ever seen, and it is very clear about all the aspects of child training. A tell tale sign you never even looked at it. You will have to be more specific if I am to believe you.

    The author of the book and others like Dobsons is very clear to use the PROPER TOOL for the proper AGE ! a little switch on a small child with the PROPER force will not Hurt the child ! I used a small swith on my children when they were very little and it didn't even leave any marks and you only need about 2 switches. Again you guys are making this worse than it really is.

    Again no one is clearly reading all the post but just want to argue against Gods word. amazing in one breath those who defend it, Condemn it in another.

    [ October 21, 2005, 12:52 AM: Message edited by: Roguelet ]
     
  4. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    A careful study of scripture reveals that the rod was used by the shepherds to guide the sheep, to keep them on the correct path, to keep them from going astray. It was not used to strike or beat the sheep into submission. It was used as a guide.

    Discipline needs to teach the children not instill fear in them.

    "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."
    Psalm 23:4

    There are many books on Biblical ways to discipline a child.

    One that takes a practical/Biblical approach is "Positive Discipline in the Christian Home" by Nelsen, Erwin, Brock, and Hughes.
     
  5. Dr. Bob

    Dr. Bob Administrator
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    I know the authors (both Dobson and Fugate), appreciate their work and strong stance on spanking, and have recommended these as resources in the field of raising a child.

    What we have here are various opinions. Which is not a problem.
     
  6. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    What the Bible Says about Child Training
    B00001
    Description:


    Based on the concept that the Bible is sufficient to equip parents for the important job of raising their children. The result of years of experience, as well as many hours of personal Bible study, this book takes a no-nonsense, hands-on approach. Fugate provides practical tips to parents on how to lovingly yet biblically fulfill their God-given role without resorting to philosophy, psychology, sociology, or public opinion.

    From the Back Cover:


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    Being a parent is a difficult and often bewildering challenge. There are so many conflicting theories about child training that even the reputed "experts" disagree with each other.

    The need for clear guidelines for parents to be successful in child training is dramatically evident in our world today. WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT...CHILD TRAINING will help parents to better understand their role and to discover the mechanics for successfully raising children. The unique aspect of this book is that the author accepts the Bible as absolute truth and infinitely superior to any human system of thinking. The system of child training presented herein has been used by over 100,000 families with dramatic results, thus providing the proof that testifies of all truth--IT WORKS!

    J. Richard Fugate accepted Christ as his Savior in 1968 at the age of 28. Three years later he totally committed himself to serve God whenever he was called. Since then he has studied the Bible under several Dallas Theological Seminary graduates; learned Greek; and founded the Foundation for Biblical Research "to determine the one, true meaning of Scripture." All of Mr. Fugate's materials are based on that research.

    Table of Contents:


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    What Do I Do Now?
    God's Promises to Parents
    Parental Accountability
    Principles of Authority
    Parental Authority
    Parental Responsibility
    The Child's Nature
    The Ages of a Child
    What Child Training Means
    Negative Training
    The Two Facets of Child Training
    What Control Means
    Where Do I Begin?
    Evaluating the Conflict
    Rebellion
    Chastisement
    The Correct Use of Chastisement
    Control Is Essential to Child Training
    What Teaching Means
    Punishment
    Standards
    Rebuke
    Guilt and Confession
    Forgiveness
    Examples
    Information:


    Published by: Foundation for Biblical Research
    Number of Pages: 330
    ISBN: 1-889700-13-4
     
  7. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    Thank you, Dr. Bob. I respect your opinion.

    Roguelet, my husband lives in a bookstore. [​IMG] Yes, he read some of that book today. He also reads very rapidly. He did not add it to his library, however. :D
     
  8. Ed Edwards

    Ed Edwards <img src=/Ed.gif>

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    Roguelet: //Looking at the book ( which I am sure you checked
    out websites online and not the actual book which is over 200 pages
    long )and reading it is not the same. I have a hard time believing
    you went to a book store and ordered it in the last few days
    which is usually what you have to do since most book stores
    do not keep it in stock. I know I have given about 10 copies away.//

    Actually the book was in the bookstore.
    I went to a funeral today. It is so blessed to bury an
    octganarian Saint. His 3-year-old great-grandaughter was trying to play
    our grand piano. Her father, a minister, being bigger than her
    just picked her up and directed both her and her attention
    to another matter.

    The book was available for purchase. As i said was my opinion:

    "It seems this particular book is
    more about unfruitful parenting techniques
    and opinion than the Bible."

    IMHO self-discipline is REQUIRED before
    adminstering Godly discipline to children.
     
  9. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    Just like the word LOVE has many different meanings in the Greek so does the word ROD.

    I found that the word translated " ROD " comes from shebet: meaning rod, staff, branch, offshoot, club, sceptre, or tribe. The rod is clearly set aside for punishment.

    The Rod mentioned regarding the shepherd is a staff, which is a tool to giud the sheep if the sheep get out of line a swift WACK on the side helps him get back in line.

    Thanks for that great example.

    I am sorry to hear your book store won't be carring a book that has helped thousands of parents raise children fit for society and Gods kingdom :(

    Again skimming a post or book doesn't help ones understanding of the true message a author is sending. I have found this to be true on message boards and my own husband who likes to read something fast when in a hurry but soon forgets or doesn't understand thoroughly what he just read :(

    [ October 21, 2005, 01:16 AM: Message edited by: Roguelet ]
     
  10. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    Ed I can't count how many times I have done the same thing they did with their 3 year old. I had two children who were very easy to deal with in this manner, all I had to do was direct them away from what I didn't want them touching NO problem. Or just tell them no and they listened.

    I don't know how many times now that I have said Spanking is for DIRECT WILLFUL DISOBEDIECE

    My other two were not so easly distracted or obeyed every time we said no, so RIGHT there that is willful disobedience that needed CORRECTING !

    And like I said I do not how many times already that SPANKING should be done ONLY for this reason and it doesn't have to be often and if done consistantly should reap results sooner than not spanking would.

    You all can do the best to attack all you want. If just one parent reads this and gets something good out of it and reads the book. It is all worth it. I am writing for that parent [​IMG]

    [ October 21, 2005, 01:21 AM: Message edited by: Roguelet ]
     
  11. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    Roguelet, I am not saying God is wrong as you have stated. No one is arguing against God's Word. If anyone is arguing, they are arguing against you and your opinions of God's Word.

    There is a difference.

    In the future, I would prefer that you do not try to put words in my posts or assign motives to what I say. I hope that you will respect my request.
     
  12. Ed Edwards

    Ed Edwards <img src=/Ed.gif>

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    Pro 23:13 (KJV1769 with Strong's numbers):
    Withhold4513 not408 correction4148 from the
    child:4480, 5288 for3588 if thou beatest5221 him
    with the rod,7626 he shall not3808 die.4191

    H7626
    שׁבט
    shêbeṭ
    shay'-bet

    From an unused root probably meaning to branch
    off; a scion, that is, (literally) a stick
    (for punishing, writing, fighting, ruling,
    walking, etc.) or (figuratively)
    a clan:
    - X correction, dart, rod, sceptre, staff,
    tribe.
     
  13. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    Thankful wrote
    Saying spanking is wrong is saying in a round about way Gods didn't mean what he said. Sorry but that is a fact not an opinion.

    But you can put your words in my mouth and change its meaning and misquote me :confused:

    My " opinion " is the same as the aurthor of the book mentioned, many pastors I personally have known, James Dobson, John Macarthur, Chuck Swindal, and Dr. Bob who's " opinion " you DO respect. Which I am sure he too has the SAME " opinion " since he too highly recommends the book.

    Why do you respect these but not me ? I am just repeating what I have read, heard and practiced. And have seen it to work in my family life and others.
     
  14. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member
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    The goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart. . .

    God has not given us a spirit of . . .

    Our goal must be to develop a sound mind in our children. That is developed mostly by example.

    A mind reaches a mind, but a life reaches a life.

    When I was much younger what I looked for was an example of some men who had older children who grew up and doing well. I found some and it made quite an impact on me.

    If we want our chidren to work hard then we must work hard and show them how it is done. If we want our children to go the extra mile then we must. If we want our children to share their faith then they must see that as a way of life with us.

    Ever notice how many children of prisoners end up in jail and how many parents who live out their faith have children who do the same. Those parents who live out their faith in accordance with scripture will speak to their children and grandchildren from the grave because of the example they set.

    If someone wants to know how to do something why not find an excellent example who has already been down that road.
     
  15. Ed Edwards

    Ed Edwards <img src=/Ed.gif>

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    Amen, Brother Gb93433 -- Preach it! [​IMG]
     
  16. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    Are there any scripture verses for this " Opinion "

    I have seen Godly parents whose kids went astray and didn't live Godly lives. I have seen horrible parent who didn't live Godly lives have Godly children when older.

    being an example isn't enough, there are way to many aspects to child rearing ALL of which are mentioned in the book. Being an example is a great one among many.

    Didn't Adam and Eve have the best example.... God.... and didn't they have the best enviorment.... the garden of Eve ? and yet the Bible talks about one of their children who went horribly wrong ?
     
  17. Rachel

    Rachel New Member

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    Roguelet, some of these people talking to you have raised wonderful godly children and they are grown and gone. I don't know about you, but people like that and their opinions carry weight in my eyes. I wouldn't dismiss them out of hand. Books can be great too of course, especially the Bible. [​IMG]
     
  18. Roguelet

    Roguelet Guest

    I have a hard time that you know anyone personally on this board. You can take their word for it I'm sure, but really know for sure how their kids turned out or how much they struggled raising them ? I doubt it.

    Oklahoma, Florida, Indiana, California, Wyoming, etc. etc. PLEEEZE

    Again we go back to Gods word and what he has to say about child training. not peoples "opinion" on a message board.

    If Pastors and well known ones at that are saying the same thing I have said on here I would take their word on what Gods word says than peoples opinions on a board that refect the loose liberal media and Dr. Spock. Sorry :(
     
  19. Rachel

    Rachel New Member

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    Roguelet, Actually I have some good friends on this board. [​IMG]

    It sounds like you just want to argue no matter what anyone says. Have fun!
     
  20. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member
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    So you want a verse? I can't give you just one but I can tell you to read your Bible and digest what God's word teaches about raising children. Scripture has many examples of people who were poor and others who were good.

    James 1:5.

    God is able to give wisdom to some which others do not have. Romans 12 and 1 Cor. 12.

    Proverbs are not promises but principles. There are no guarantees just because you live for Jesus that your children will. One of the qualifications of a pastor is that his children are under control. If he is not a leader at home then do not give him that responsibilty in the church when he has already failed at home.

    Why should I read James Dobson when I am surrounded by men and women who are godly examples.

    People are people. There is the responsibility of the parent and the child. The child must be willing to live for Christ.

    I grew up in one of those ungodly, antagonistic, judgmental home. I did not come around until the man who led me to Christ. For the next three weeks after he led me to Christ I met with him every day. From that point on I met with him to share Christ with others, pray, read the Bible, study the Bible and begin to help others grow. We went to church together and did a lot of activities together. The following year I had a Christian roommate. He continued to meet with me until the day he left when he graduated.
     
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