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Do you spank your child?

Discussion in 'Polls Forum' started by blessedmamma, Jun 3, 2005.

?
  1. yes, I spank my child when needed

    100.0%
  2. no, I do not spank my child

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. blessedmamma

    blessedmamma New Member

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    Okay so I am confussed, my hubby says spank and the child's doctor says not to spank, what do you do with your own children/child?
     
  2. donnA

    donnA New Member

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    We spanked ours and they learned we were serious, and that there were conquences to their actions.
     
  3. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member

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    Everyone must learn that there are consequences for every action. If the action is good the consequences are good. If the actions are bad the consequences are bad. What I find is that often times the parent expects too much or too little of their child. Children must be instructed. If an action is malicious then they must get the reward of that. If the action is an accident then if there is a punishment it must be according to what is appropriate. In our home and where I teach I have a rule that you are able to strongly diagree and voice your opinion but always with respect. But our daughter has found out that others do not always appreciate her disagreement. So we have been teaching her about the right time to voice a disagreement.
     
  4. Joseph_Botwinick

    Joseph_Botwinick <img src=/532.jpg>Banned

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    Find another doctor.

    Joseph Botwinick
     
  5. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    I don't believe in spanking children. Yes, they do need to be disciplined, corrected and suffer the consequences of their actions, but there other ways than a huge person striking a small person.
     
  6. rlvaughn

    rlvaughn Well-Known Member

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    I had to vote in the present tense, although all spankings for my children are in the past tense. It is both a scripture-sanctioned and time-proven method of discipline.
     
  7. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

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    Nick will be 11 in December and was swatted 2 times in his life through diapers or thick clothing. One time was when spoke very rudely to us in Home Depot. He was taken to the car and swatted once on his padded bottom. It shocked him so terribly that he seemed to really get the message. Both times were before he was 4 years old.

    Our grown kids got spanked by daddy very seldom and not after they were old enough to reason with. It had to be a very serious and repeated offense to warrant a spanking. Telling the truth about an offense would prevent a spanking, too.

    Eph 6:4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
     
  8. Ben W

    Ben W New Member

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    It depends on how hard the Spanking is, if it is so hard that it leaves bruises, the child should be taken away by welfare as that is child abuse.
     
  9. Artimaeus

    Artimaeus Active Member

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    I don't have any children but when I was a teacher and paddling was allowed I did.. I have various nieces and nephews whom we keep from time to time and I reserve the right to do so if I deem it necessary. It is very rarely needed, maybe a half a doxen times in the last 20 years.
     
  10. Gershom

    Gershom New Member

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    We don't spank.
     
  11. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O. Well-Known Member

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    Here's the bottom line....

    You have to find the best form of instruction and correction for you own child. For some, it is spanking. For others, it is verbal instruction. For others, it may be something else.

    I have taught school for 22 years and have spanked less than 10 times. It was only when I had the parents' permission in written form and just after a telephone call making sure the written form of spanking was valid. And it was when other tried and true methods failed.

    I haven't spanked in over 10 years, but I do believe it is a valid form of correction.

    That being said, not all children respond to spanking.

    I have a dear friend who spanks her son regularly and so does her husband. The child, nonetheless, is a tyrant. When I am around him, I speak softly to him. "Robert, stop stepping on my foot, please. You are hurting me"...or...."Robert, don't play with my angel collection on the shelf. Those aren't toys." He generally stops. I say, "Thank you. You are a good boy to mind me so well. Let's find a toy you can play with."

    His parents don't get it. They ONLY spank. And it's doing no good in their household.

    Conversely, I teach another dear friend's child in Children's Choir. The little girl, who is 4, is a nightmare. She screams, hits, stomps her foot, and is a menace. I don't spank her little bottom because her parents don't spank her, but they need to. They try the soft spoken approach, but it does NOT work. She has bitten her mother in church, hit every other kid in her class at Sunday School, and minds NOBODY.

    What I do with her is to speak harshly. And I don't like it. The rear end of a child is padded for a reason. If I could just give the child a little swat on her bottom when she screams or defies all of the choir workers or pulls hair or throw crayons, then she would learn that she is NOT the boss.

    What I end up doing is saying things like, "Amanda, you will NOT throw anymore crayons, because I am taking your crayons away."...or..."You may NOT scream in Pete's ear and you will sit at the end of the line for the rest of choir time."

    All during choir, all I do is to treat her in a negative manner. Even my tried and true "choice method" doesn't work. "Amanda, you have a choice. You can stop throwing a tantrum and stay with us or you can continue throwing a tantrum and go to the nursery." It doesn't work.

    She is frightened of me and for the past few months, looks at me just before she begins her negative behavior. If I give her that "look", she sometimes stops herself....sometimes. But it is at the price of not liking me and being intimidated by me.

    I don't like that. But, with her, I have no other choice.

    With her, a good swat on the behind, over her clothes could possibly do wonders. But it's almost too late. Her parents get frustrated with her and in all actuality, have never made an attempt to stop her inappropriate behavior other than begging her to stop.

    Spanking has its place. Generally last place, the proverbial last resort, but it has its place nonetheless.

    You must decide for you own child what form of correction your child best responds to.

    And remember, adult correction administered to a child is for helping guide the child to a place where he or she can develop their own SELF-discipline.

    The saddest thing is a child who never learned self-discipline growing up into an adult who has no concept of it.

    Peace-
    Scarlett O.
    &lt;&gt;&lt;
     
  12. Soulman

    Soulman New Member

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    Spare the rod and spoil the child. A child will not die from a spanking and the bible advocates it.
     
  13. Ben W

    Ben W New Member

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    How about if it is your neighbour or childs teacher that spanks the child? Is that o.k with you?
     
  14. Joseph_Botwinick

    Joseph_Botwinick <img src=/532.jpg>Banned

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    Off topic. But, since you asked, when I was a kid, my parents spanked me when I was bad. My teachers never had to do so because I was well disciplined at home. My neighbor never had to do so because I was well disciplined at home. When I was at Church, if I misbehaved, other adults would take me to my parents and they would discipline me.

    On the other hand, there were members of my church who were so close to the family, that if mom and dad were not around and I was rebellious, they certainly had the right to discipline me. That was very rare that they had to.

    Joseph Botwinick
     
  15. FriendofSpurgeon

    FriendofSpurgeon Well-Known Member

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    Can't answer poll. Did spank when they were younger. Don't spank now that they are older.
     
  16. TaterTot

    TaterTot Guest

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    We spank but it is reserved as a last resort and only for the most serious offenses (blatant defiance). No one else is allowed to spank our children, not grandparents, not anyone. We discipline in other ways as well.
     
  17. PastorSBC1303

    PastorSBC1303 Active Member

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    That is our policy as well.
     
  18. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

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    I have a four year old in S/S (girl) who routinely swats the other children upside the back of their head. When nothing else failed, I went to the mother. 'How did she hit them?', mother asked.... and right away I knew where this child had leared to swat the back of the head. Now I tell this child if she doesn't behave, I'm going to page her parents in S/S class and they'll be very embarassed and very angry with us both.
     
  19. Sularis

    Sularis New Member

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    Spanking last resort - whose raising the kids your hubby or the doctor?

    Sorry gonna be a lil rude here - but the question reads as my husbands opinion is as important as a stranger to our family - I do not value my husbands opinion as my own - cause God knows if you disagreed with that doctor about raising your kids you'd be telling the doctor to go somewhere rather warm and fiery.


    Why did you even ask that question? If you have no opinion or are confused on a subject guess whose opinion you get to follow - your spouses!

    I realize Im not married and have no kids - but for supposedly being one flesh/one person - you sure are doubting the other part
     
  20. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O. Well-Known Member

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    You are right...you were rude.

    Peace-
    S.O.
    &lt;&gt;&lt;
     
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