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Factory Recall

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by JackRUS, Jun 16, 2006.

  1. JackRUS

    JackRUS New Member

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    The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central components of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units - code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

    This defect has been termed "Subsequential Internal Non-morality" or more commonly known as S.I.N.

    Some symptoms of this defect:

    1. Loss of direction.
    2. Foul vocal emissions
    3. Amnesia of origin
    4. Lack of peace and joy
    5. Selfish. or violent behavior
    6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
    7. Fearfulness
    8. Idolatry
    9. Rebellion

    The Manufacturer, Who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect is providing factory authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this S.I.N. defect.

    The repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost for these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

    The number to call in all areas is P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your S.I.N. through REPENTANCE procedure.

    Next, download ATONEMENT from the repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the S.I.N. defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

    1. Love
    2. Joy
    3. Peace
    4. Patience
    5. Kindness
    6. Goodness
    7. Faithfulness
    8. Gentleness
    9. Self-control

    Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these repairs.

    WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any guarantee or warranty. For free emergency service, call on Jesus.

    DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The S.I.N. defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven, so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

    In Love,
    God.

    P.S. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice!
     
  2. faithgirl46

    faithgirl46 Active Member
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    :applause: :applause: Very well stated. Kudos.
    Faithgirl
     
  3. Mishelly

    Mishelly New Member

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    :praise: :flower:
     
  4. Paul1611

    Paul1611 New Member

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    That would make a neat gospel tract.
    I think its pretty cool!
     
  5. HeDied4U

    HeDied4U Active Member
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    :thumbs::thumbs::thumbs:
     
  6. faithgirl46

    faithgirl46 Active Member
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    I agree that it would make a good Gospel Tract.
    Faithgirl
     
  7. JackRUS

    JackRUS New Member

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    I'm sorry but I forgot to note that I am not the original author of this "recall notice."

    My pastor was sent a copy of this and passed it along to me. I would suggest that if you would like you could cut & paste it and e-mail it along to your friends as I have. (If you haven't already that is:wavey: )
     
  8. JamieinNH

    JamieinNH New Member

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