SEATTLE, WA—Stating that he’d had a good feeling about his eternal fate ever since having his morning coffee, local man Steve Devlin confirmed Tuesday that he was “feeling pretty darn saved today.”
Though he reportedly can not put his finger on exactly why, he nonetheless feels a wonderful rest down in his soul.
“Yesterday was a little dicey, though,” Devlin admitted to sources. “I’d been struggling with some sins and just had a general sense of malaise, so I was only about, maybe 25% sure of my salvation.”
http://babylonbee.com/news/arminian-feeling-pretty-saved-today/
Though he reportedly can not put his finger on exactly why, he nonetheless feels a wonderful rest down in his soul.
“Yesterday was a little dicey, though,” Devlin admitted to sources. “I’d been struggling with some sins and just had a general sense of malaise, so I was only about, maybe 25% sure of my salvation.”
http://babylonbee.com/news/arminian-feeling-pretty-saved-today/
