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Husbands, Love your Wives

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by gerald285, Jan 1, 2007.

  1. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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    Thanks for bringing us back on topic, Donna!

    To love someone is to commit to care for them over and above one's care for oneself. It takes a lot of different forms, depending on the people involved.
     
  2. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

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    I am glad no one I know married Aaron. It seems quite a warped perspective of the Biblical union between a man and a woman. It is beyond me how that marriage could survive Christian or not. Love our wives means just what it says. It does not say, you made your bed now lie in it. There is no command in the Bible for a wife to put up with a mean abusive husband. It is a two way street. The other side is love your wife. Without one, the other one does not work.

    So Aaron, do you think a woman should be beaten every day because she married a person that does not meet YOUR idea of a Christian marriage? Do you think this dooms this woman to a life of abuse if she made an error in judgement? What kind of God do you serve?
     
  3. tinytim

    tinytim <img src =/tim2.jpg>

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    I guess you could call her mrstiny... or tinytabatha:saint:

    As a matter of fact, I have asked her if she wants to participate here on BB, and she declined... something about too much debate going on...

    Actually, it could be the fact that I have loved her so much that she doesn't have the time too... why, with all the mending of my socks, cooking my 3 square meals each day, having my babies, doing my dishes, cleaning my house, washing my car, mowing my yard, teaching my children, dusting my furniture, and anything else I command her to do (all because I love her, of course) she wouldn't have time to participate here...

    Did I mention knitting me a blanket....
    Preparing my bathwater...
    Cutting my steak...

    Hmmmm... I wonder how all you married women here have the time to post on BB...
    You must be neglecting your owner..ooops... I mean man.
     
  4. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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    Tiny, read that out loud to Barry and he almost choked he was laughing so hard.

    You have an incredible wife, clearly!

    I can post here because my husband is my slave. He peels my grapes, but I get the skins because they are the best part for me.

    He makes my bed....and lies in it.

    He stacks the wood....and then uses it to keep me warm.

    He gets me my tea.....so I'll be nice to him.

    He wants you to know he does the vacuuming on occasion so he doesn't get smothered in his own dust.

    All so I can spend my time reading romance novels, playing on the forum, and eating the chocolates he runs downtown to buy for me.

    Ahhhhhh....this is the life.....

    Now excuse me while I go out and feed the critters....he's laughing too hard to do it himself right now....

    Oh, by the way, he has declared himself responsible for everything that goes wrong around here, so I'm off the hook for everything. I used to argue with him about that and try to take responsibility for my own misdeeds, but he always found a way to explain to me that if he had not done such and such then I would not have done the other. Finally, being an obedient wife, I stopped arguing with him and agreed that everything is his fault.
     
  5. tinytim

    tinytim <img src =/tim2.jpg>

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    Yeah, it is guys like that that make it hard on all the rest of us....

    Ask him what size motor he has in his Vacuum..
    I want a twin barreled, bored out 360 kirby, with a dual microfiltration system... lol
     
  6. tinytim

    tinytim <img src =/tim2.jpg>

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    Folks the answer to how a man should love his wife is really simple...

    You never forget that she is a gift from God. Then you cherish that gift!
     
  7. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

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    That is an excellent way to put it. Someone always expresses what I think better than I do.
     
  8. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    Good answer Tim.
     
  9. Predestined

    Predestined Member

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    Words of wisdom. :godisgood:
     
  10. tinytim

    tinytim <img src =/tim2.jpg>

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    That's what I get from listening to my wife!!!
     
  11. Predestined

    Predestined Member

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    Me too lol.
     
  12. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    Read the whole thread, then try to get smart about it. You just look stupid here. And, honestly, if truth were the concern of my critics they would have been as quick to correct you here as they were to disparage me earlier, but truth isn't their concern and the trend I identified earlier remains true. Though I put a burden on the man to love his wife equal to the burden on the woman to submit, and that the duty of a man to love his wife is not contingent upon the wife's submission, all anyone is really concerned about here is that I don't allow the woman to make her submission contigent upon the man's love. They just want to know when a woman doesn't have to submit. It's very telling, and takes some of the mystery away from Satan's motivation to address the woman in the Garden, and not the man.
     
  13. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    What do I require of my wife, Tim. Do you know? Would it surprise you to know that she often tells me how lucky she is to have me? That I have "saved" her? Does it surprise you to hear that I feel the same way about her?

    Would someone who is a monster inspire the kind of anniversary card like the one she made me in 2004?

    http://thriftyplanet.net/aaron/Ann2004.jpg

    Why should I be required to say anything like this to counter what is really personal attack that has no foundation whatever, except that you find God's commands grievous and inconsistent with effeminacy?

    The duties of the virtuous woman God described in Proverbs 31 makes your list look like a Sunday school picnic. Nary a man will find a woman who can fill the bill. He said so Himself. So, ladies, here is God's picture of a virtuous woman. A vast majority of you don't measure up, but what can I do about it? I won't mitigate God's requirements for you, neither will I allow the man to use your failures as an excuse to abdicate his responsibility.

    My wife knows my failures. There is no earthly way that I can ever measure up to God's standards as a man, but see what she said regardless. Wherever I go, she will go. Wherever I live, she will live. My people will be her people.

    Go thou and do likewise. Here endeth the lesson.
     
    #73 Aaron, Jan 6, 2007
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 6, 2007
  14. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O. Moderator
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    Not when, Aaron. She is to have a spirit of reverence for her husband at all times.

    We are talking about how she is to be submissive. With or without regard to a higher authority than her husband. Should she remain in sin herself or allow her husband to remain in sin without holding him accountable just for the sake of letting him appear in his own eyes to be without sin and thereby feel like her authority?

    We not talking about bad men or abusive men. Just ordinary christian guys who make mistakes every now and again.

    Let me give you one example. I said earlier that my parents have displayed the very essence of a christian marriage for almost 50 years. Here's a little lesson among the countless thousand that I learned from them.

    One day when I was a teenager, my dad came home from work very grouchy. This was not typical. My dad is a great guy and loves my mother dearly.

    He grumped around the house and my little brother and I stayed away from him, not out of fear, but out of respect for his hard job.

    My mother worked too. Outside the home and inside. When dinner time came, my dad said rudely, "Is this all we're having tonight are these hamburgers?" I looked at the table and saw a nice meal.....hamburgers, french fries, vegetables, and cake.

    But my dad had had a bad day. All he saw was frustation. My mother said very compassionately, "I'm sorry, hon, I didn't know that you don't want a hamburger. I'm sorry that you've had a bad day and I'm sorry that you aren't in the mood for hamburgers."

    He settled down and then she added, still quite respectfully,....."Feel free to get up and cook yourself whatever you would like."

    My dad got the point, gave my mother that "look" that said "I love you" and he ate what was presented to him. I gained much respect for both my mother and my father during that meal. He was still a little grouchy, but he ate heartily and we had a nice talk together.

    And this statement of yours is very telling......
     
  15. mnw

    mnw New Member

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    Sounds like a good home Scarlett. Thanks for sharing that instance.

    So one personal attack deserves another? Aaron, whether the personal attacks are real or percieved this statement seems just as unfounded as the statements about yourself that you object to.

    I would go with the position of the wife "obeying" and "submitting" to the husband as long as he is in submission to the Lord and is in obedience and submission to Him.

    How far does the position of ultimate obedience and submission go? What of a child obeying the parents? What of the church obeying and submitting to its pastor?

    Maybe extreme situations were cited, but, those situations happen.

    Further, bad marriages are not always the result of a poor, unadvised choice. I know of a situation where both sets of parents, both pastors, and all friends and other family were in favour of the marriage. But, after a while it proved to be rotton to its core. The wife HAD submitted consistently but the husband had appetites that would not be fulfilled within the bonds of marriage. So, he looked elsewhere.

    A submissive wife or a loving husband is not a 100% sure fire method for a successful marriage. But, a submissive wife or loving husband can be sure of a good testimony and a clear conscious before the Lord.
     
  16. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

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    Being happily married for 30 years, I certainly do not need the advice from an unChristlike mindset to tell me how to enjoy a marriage ordained by God.
     
  17. tinytim

    tinytim <img src =/tim2.jpg>

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    Oh, chill out Aaron...I am very happy you are a happily married man, and your wife loves you with all her heart...That is what marriage is all about.
    And you have 2 cute daughters too. You should be very pleased.

    As I am with my family. I can't imagine my life without my wife, and sons. She is great asset to our ministry.
    God knew what He was doing when he created us for each other.

    And talk about failures.... Whew....my wife could tell you stories.
    And for the record, I don't think you are a monster!
    When I said, that I am glad my wife didn't marry you, I meant it...just like I am glad she didn't marry anyone else.

    I am glad God gave you the wife He intended for you to have.

    :thumbsup:
     
  18. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    Nevermind. I had a big long post here, but it is a rare case that I have been provoked, and now...well, if you thought my posts were vitriolic before, even I am judging them now to be over the line.
     
    #78 Aaron, Jan 6, 2007
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 6, 2007
  19. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    :thumbs: Thanks for the nice words, Tim.
     
  20. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    In 2005 we had our 25th anniversary. I did not have money to buy my husband a gift. So I put my scrapbooking skills to work, I made hima set of decorated tags with poems and a picture of me, and aon another one a picture of the two of us, I put these inside a decorated pocket. he actually cried when I gave this to him, he said it was ebtter then any gift I might buy him.
    My husband wouldn't think of sharing that with anyone.
     
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