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Marriage and family

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Aaron, Jul 25, 2005.

  1. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    A couple of statements were made in another thread that deserve a response.

    Marriage is much more than just having children. There are many other reasons for a couple to marry.

    1 Corinthians 7:9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (NKJV)
    </font>[/QUOTE]Yes, it's better to marry than to burn, but it does not follow that marriage has no other purpose. In fact, if self control doesn't blossom soon, you will destroy your marriage. Self control is a fruit of the Spirit, and one of the eight callings of a Christian in 2 Pet. 1:6.

    It also does not follow that Paul was advocating one's neglect or thwarting of the other responsibilities and purposes of marriage when he advised those with no self control to marry.


    What lout thinks he has the right to engage in sex whenever he feels?

    {post edited to remove imho, offensive language}

    [ July 27, 2005, 08:56 AM: Message edited by: Frogman ]
     
  2. Su Wei

    Su Wei Active Member
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    Aaron said: God says lots of children are a blessing.

    Pastor Larry said: Really? Where?? That isn't in my Bible that I know of.

    Just taking most of the verses that have the word multiply and blessing in it, my bible says:

    Genesis 1:28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

    Genesis 9:1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.

    Genesis 17:1-2 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I am the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect. And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.

    Genesis 17:20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.

    Genesis 22:17 That in blessing I will bless thee, and in multiplying I will multiply thy seed as the stars of the heaven, and as the sand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the gate of his enemies;

    God to Isaac:
    Genesis 26:24 And the LORD appeared unto him the same night, and said, I am the God of Abraham thy father: fear not, for I am with thee, and will bless thee, and multiply thy seed for my servant Abraham's sake.

    Genesis 48:3-4 And Jacob said unto Joseph, God Almighty appeared unto me at Luz in the land of Canaan, and blessed me, And said unto me, Behold, I will make thee fruitful, and multiply thee, and I will make of thee a multitude of people; and will give this land to thy seed after thee for an everlasting possession.

    Deuteronomy 7:12 Wherefore it shall come to pass, if ye hearken to these judgments, and keep, and do them, that the LORD thy God shall keep unto thee the covenant and the mercy which he sware unto thy fathers:
    Deuteronomy 7:13 And he will love thee, and bless thee, and multiply thee: he will also bless the fruit of thy womb, and the fruit of thy land, thy corn, and thy wine, and thine oil, the increase of thy kine, and the flocks of thy sheep, in the land which he sware unto thy fathers to give thee.

    Deuteronomy 8:1 All the commandments which I command thee this day shall ye observe to do, that ye may live, and multiply, and go in and possess the land which the LORD sware unto your fathers.

    Deuteronomy 28:63 And it shall come to pass, that as the LORD rejoiced over you to do you good, and to multiply you; so the LORD will rejoice over you to destroy you, and to bring you to nought; and ye shall be plucked from off the land whither thou goest to possess it.

    Deuteronomy 30:5-6 And the LORD thy God will bring thee into the land which thy fathers possessed, and thou shalt possess it; and he will do thee good, and multiply thee above thy fathers. And the LORD thy God will circumcise thine heart, and the heart of thy seed, to love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, that thou mayest live.

    Jeremiah 33:22 As the host of heaven cannot be numbered, neither the sand of the sea measured: so will I multiply the seed of David my servant, and the Levites that minister unto me.

    Hebrews 6:13-14 For when God made promise to Abraham, because he could swear by no greater, he sware by himself, Saying, Surely blessing I will bless thee, and multiplying I will multiply thee.

    Psalms 127:3 Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.

    [​IMG]
     
  3. TexasSky

    TexasSky Guest

    I think we all agree that children are blessings - but "too much of anything" ceases to be a blessing.

    The question, if I understand it, is "are children the only purpose of marriage?"
     
  4. Songbird

    Songbird New Member

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    TexasSky--I hope not! I was 39 and my dh was 40 when we got married. We're not able to have children. But our life is just as fulfilled--b/c we live it to serve the Lord.

    And--the most important human relationship (besides our relationship w/God)is husband and wife IMHO--b/c it was the first relationship introduced between humans. It's also the example that's used when descibing Christ and the Church.

    We'd love to be blessed w/our own children but it may not be in God's plan for us.
     
  5. 4His_glory

    4His_glory New Member

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    Marriage is much more than just having children. There are many other reasons for a couple to marry.

    1 Corinthians 7:9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (NKJV)
    </font>[/QUOTE]Yes, it's better to marry than to burn, but it does not follow that marriage has no other purpose. In fact, if self control doesn't blossom soon, you will destroy your marriage. Self control is a fruit of the Spirit, and one of the eight callings of a Christian in 2 Pet. 1:6.

    It also does not follow that Paul was advocating one's neglect or thwarting of the other responsibilities and purposes of marriage when he advised those with no self control to marry. </font>[/QUOTE]Did I say that one should not exercise self control? No I did not so don't put words in my mouth. Paul did say though:

    Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1Cor 7:2-5 (NKJV)

    It would seem then that a husband and wife ought to satisfy the desires of each other as often as they can and not deny one another. It is true though that to make harsh demands of ones spouse is unloving and wrong.

    Also I did not deny that one of the purposes of marriage is to have children, I was simply pointing out that this is not the sole purpose, in fact it is not the primary purpose of marriage.

    [ July 27, 2005, 09:00 AM: Message edited by: Frogman ]
     
  6. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    But it is the primary purpose of sex.
     
  7. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    That would be A primary purpose. Otherwise, when a married couple in their 70's engages in it, what would be the purpose? Or if a couple knows they will not be able to have children.
    Many other purposes, I would think.

    Karen
     
  8. Frogman

    Frogman <img src="http://www.churches.net/churches/fubc/Fr

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    Paul also speaks of definite trouble in the flesh for those who do marry.

    This is a valid Scriptural topic. Please give careful consideration as to how your posts and replies are worded. Otherwise this thread will have to be closed.

    Discuss the topic Scripturally and refrain from the use of slang descriptors.

    Bro. Dallas
     
  9. 4His_glory

    4His_glory New Member

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    Can you prove that from Scritpure?

    I would say it is A purpose not THE priamary purpose. God created it for married couples to enjoy and love each other with, and when this is done it glorifies Him.
     
  10. TexasSky

    TexasSky Guest

    I thought the primary reason was so that Adam would not be alone.

    Genesis: Chapter Two.

    18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. 19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. 20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. 21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

    By the strictest rules of reading the English language, this passage says that sex is a RESULT of marriage, not the REASON for marriage. The REASON is companionship.
     
  11. 4His_glory

    4His_glory New Member

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    Right on Texas.
     
  12. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    Frogman, you changed the meaning in my post. Could you kindly change "but it does not follow that marriage has no other purpose" to say, "but it doesn't mean marriage is there for you to indulge your lusts."

    Note to all, the term I used was not obscene. I might concede it was profane, but I didn't use the term flippantly. To use one's wife simply for the fulfillment of his lusts is to profane the act, and I couldn't think of a more apt description. [​IMG]

    Can you prove that from Scritpure?

    I would say it is A purpose not THE priamary purpose. God created it for married couples to enjoy and love each other with, and when this is done it glorifies Him.
    </font>[/QUOTE]You've got to be kidding! :eek: Open your eyes. How do you know when you're on the downhill side of the act?

    In fact, were the act interrupted on the uphill side, before you reached the—uh—crest, wouldn't you think yourself rather ill used? You'd be very frustrated at the very least. It's just not complete without the little event at the top of the hill where we leave something behind.

    God gave a name to that something left at the top of the hill, and it wasn't "The Lovin' Spoonfull".
    He called it, "seed".

    There you have it. God's Word about the primary purpose of sex.
     
  13. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    Yes, the primary reason for marriage is society, not sex. You're right.
     
  14. TaterTot

    TaterTot Guest

    Aaorn,

    So a man who doesnt have "active" seed should not have sex?
     
  15. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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    I think perhaps when a marriage is young, the physical part of sex looms pretty big. But as you get older, there is something else which begins to become predominant. They physical fulfillment is still big, but what becomes bigger is the one-ness, a sort of spiritual thing, that happens with the physical expression of love. It is that one-ness which God seems to have given as the primary reason for marriage in Genesis 2:24.

    Children are major. There is no doubt about it. And they are totally a blessing from the Lord, even if they do give us gray hairs and wrinkles and high blood pressure! Then they grow out of their teens .... grin....

    But marriage is far more than 'family.' It is the physical representation of our spiritual relationship to Christ, as His bride. So it is ever so much more than having children or even being the foundation of a stable society. It is a picture of a spiritual reality. That is, perhaps, why the marriage union is under so much attack from the 'other side.'

    Sex is the only physical expression God has given us of what happens when Christ enters a willing heart: a new life is conceived and born and grows to maturity.

    Marriage and sex are holy. Children are one result that happens sometimes. And that is a blessing from God. But both marriage and sex are ever so much more than that.
     
  16. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    You are absolutely right, Helen. [​IMG] All things were made by Him and for Him.
     
  17. superdave

    superdave New Member

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    I noticed one particular feature of those verses, they all seem to be directed at very specific individuals.

    For instance, God Promised that from Abraham's seed a great nation would be made. Can I claim that promise and blessing? Will the Davidites be God's New chosen people? Should I follow in the footsteps of Joe Smith and dig up a golden Bible to "reveal" the truth about the blessed future of my progeny?

    If children are indeed a blessing in the sense you are using it, I could also claim many other promises in the OT that even you might agree are a stretch.

    Children are a blessing, and they are clearly from God, but thare is no direct application of those verses to my christian walk. Having children does not make me more or less spiritual, or more or less blessed. Neither do they imply or command that children are a primary purpose for the act of marriage.
     
  18. 4His_glory

    4His_glory New Member

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    I did not see anything in that post from God's Word, all I saw was "Aaron's word". In fact what said shows your ignorance of God's Word and was rather vulgar.
     
  19. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    Doth not even nature itself teach you? I described the nature of the act, the completion of it, and used God's terminology for it.

    It can't be made much more plain.
     
  20. TaterTot

    TaterTot Guest

    Aaron,

    You didnt answer my question about someone with "inactive" seed. Are they disqualified from the act?
     
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