Men and hats II (The sequal)

What about Verse 16 (to get back to the original topic)

"But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God" I Cor 11:16 KJV

 

You know, I don't think I've ever preached on sexual abstinence. I follow the lectionary, and I can't think of a time the topic came up.

As we discussed on another thread, my experience in pastoral counselling is that even very conservative couples have sex before marriage. In fact, as a result of that thread, I called my most conservative friend and asked her and she noted that even she and her husband had not "waited." If even people who believe they should wait, don't, my guess is that my time is best spent focusing on more critical social and family issues.

Joshua

 

My blushing bride came to our marriage bed "virgo intactus." Our daughter did the same thing.

Perhaps the problem is that too many theological liberals have "(n)ever preached on sexual abstinence." Perhaps if you preached on the sin of fornication more often, you would not have so many whores and whoremongers to deal with.

[ August 31, 2001: Message edited by: Thomas Cassidy ]

 

I deal with the issue of sexual behavior in my line of work all the time. It is the most frequent issue in the vast majority of cases where I am involved (I'm an intake counselor at a privately owned group home).

From my experience (adding up into a number of years worth at this point, evidenced by my graying temples) many of the deeper problems that people experience in family relationships come out of the fact that they did not wait until they were married.

That same experience shows that people who come from the more conservative churches which use strong language like "whoredom" and "fornication" and where preachers frequently rage against specific sins in their sermons are the most likely ones to have a sexual relationship outside of marriage. Their difficulties are often two-fold. They must go to great lengths to keep their sin hidden and convince people that they are still pure, and they have crushing guilt experiences as a result of trying to live two lives.

Of course my experiences are anecdotal, however, over the years I have observed that the most likely individuals to abstain from a sexual relationship prior to marriage come from a Catholic or high Protestant (Episcopal, Lutheran) background(a.k.a. "theological liberals). I have also surprisingly discovered that many people who have no Christian convictions are also among those who wait for marriage.

[ September 01, 2001: Message edited by: RobertLynn ]

[ September 01, 2001: Message edited by: RobertLynn ]

 

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by RobertLynn:
That same experience shows that people who come from the more conservative churches which use strong language like "whoredom" and "fornication" and where preachers frequently rage against specific sins in their sermons are the most likely ones to have a sexual relationship outside of marriage. Their difficulties are often two-fold. They must go to great lengths to keep their sin hidden and convince people that they are still pure, and they have crushing guilt experiences as a result of trying to live two lives. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Interesting hypothesis. Those who use biblical language and preach against the sins Christ preached against are more likely to be living in such sin than those who use unbiblical language and never preach against the sins Christ preached against? I doubt it. I have been in the ministry for 27 years (I was well into adulthood when I was saved) and can testify to exactly the opposite experience. Those who understand sin, and are taught to respect themselves and others, and know what the bible calls those who refuse to control the sexual desires tend to yield to the Holy Spirit and stay pure until their wedding day.

 

What I strenuously object to is the attitude that "purity" is the most important thing a newlywed could offer their spouse. I rank it far, far below honesty, self-confidence, maturity, conflict-resolution skills, and other similar things. Whether or not a person has touched someones body in a particular place once, a thousand times, or never is not going to have nearly the impact on their marital health that those other skills are.

Admittedly, my counseling experience is also anecdotal, so I have no way to judge. Only a couple of the couples (pardon the alliteration) whom I've seen actually "waited" and they had some pretty significant sexual issues. In observing the larger culture, it seems that couples who wait marry much younger - I would argue too young - and before they have a chance to really develop their individual identities.

Rev. Joshua

[ September 02, 2001: Message edited by: CJoshuaV ]

 

Almost everything being "spewed" on this entire board is man's opinion, down to those who keep coming up with convoluted contexts to explain their particular interpretation of a passage of scripture, and then proceed to disprove any who disagree. I don't see that cjoshuav has downplayed or belittled anything, in fact, he has often offered better scriptural support in a clearer context for his statements than almost anyone else here. And aside from that, his spirit of response is certainly far more Christian than many who take authority they don't have to blast and belittle. Seems administrators on this board have a lot more freedom to "flame" and blast those who disagree than regular members.

 

I don't even know why I'm in this thread, but I just wondered...how did you guys go from men and hats and women covering their heads to sexual purity? LoL

Kathy
&lt;&gt;&lt;

 

Doc Cassidy,
I left you an important message on the FFF, sorry to post this in the wrong place, please forgive me

PreachersWife