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sex of unmarried couples?

Discussion in '2004 Archive' started by Aki, Oct 21, 2004.

  1. Aki

    Aki Member

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    is sex before marriage sin? what if they are both singles? or is it just recommended or perhaps emotionally added by the feel-good impress-God i-think-im-holy types?

    how about two unmarried people doing it simply for fun without any commitment in mind? it sounds dirty, but is it really against biblical principles?

    this is an honest inquiry. any theology on this?
     
  2. DHK

    DHK <b>Moderator</b>

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    1 Corinthians 6:9-10 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.
     
  3. Deborah B.

    Deborah B. New Member

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    Amen DHK! That one verse says it quite clearly doesn't it? [​IMG]

    In Christ,
    Deborah
     
  4. Aki

    Aki Member

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    aren't fornication and adultery issues for married individuals? does it also apply to non-married ones?
     
  5. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Sex, outside of marriage, is sin. PERIOD.

    1 Corinthians 6:13b Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 14 And God both raised up the Lord and will also raise us up by His power. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! 16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For "the two," He says, "shall become one flesh." 17 But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. 18 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? 20 For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body F16 and in your spirit, which are God's.

    in another, easier version...

    13b But our bodies were not made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. 14 And God will raise our bodies from the dead by his marvelous power, just as he raised our Lord from the dead. 15 Don't you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which belongs to Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! 16 And don't you know that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, "The two are united into one." 17 But the person who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. 18 Run away from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. 19 Or don't you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

    If your preacher is not preaching this, change churches.
     
  6. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    for·ni·ca·tion
    n.
    Sexual intercourse between partners who are not married to each other.
     
  7. pinoybaptist

    pinoybaptist Active Member
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    Strictly speaking, adultery is sexual intercourse of a married individual with another individual who may not be married to him/her, or to another, or who may be married but not to her/him.

    The difference between fornication and adultery is that the former is promiscous activity while the latter is a relationship. In olden times, fornication was associated with men mostly who had sexual intercourse with a prostitute, strictly a pleasure thing, and thus not a relationship, as with adultery, unless the man takes the woman as his mistress and he is married.

    In modern times, with the corrosion of morals, and its continuing downward plunge, the lines between fornication and adultery are continously becoming thinner and thinner.

    Whatever, the true child of God should not event hink fornication and/or adultery are non-vital issues. They are.
    Hope this helps.
     
  8. Aki

    Aki Member

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    agreed!

    it's just that the issues presented in the scriptures mostly apply to married people. indeed, the instruction of staying away from fornication and adultery are given to those who are married.

    on a personal note, and therefore subjective, i believe that one of the best gifts that a man/woman can give his/her future wife/husband is his/her "untouched" body (though this is really isn't that much of a big deal when one looks at the big picture of a relationship)...
     
  9. North Carolina Tentmaker

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    Aki said
    While I agree that a pure body is a wonderful gift to your spouse I have to disagree about how big a deal this is Aki. This is a really big deal when you look at the big picture of a relationship. The baggage that previous sexual activity bring to a relationship is huge.

    There is the physical aspect. Are there children out there? Specifically with men who have lived promiscuously, is there a possibility that some child will show up later? I had an employee this year who found out he fathered a son 18 years ago. A son he only learned about this year. There is the issue of Aids and other STDs. As a man who has never had a sexual partner other than his wife I can be fairy confident that we are disease free.

    There is the emotional aspect. The self doubt of a partner who worries that they will be compared to previous partners. Am I as good as the others? What if I am not? If they did not keep themselves pure before marriage why should I believe that they will remain monogamous after marriage. What if my body changes and I get old, fat, and bald, will my spouse seek someone sexier?

    There is the spiritual aspect. If my partner knew this was wrong and broke God's law willfully what does it say about their relationship with God. If the fornication occurred before Salvation it may help, but the question will always be there.

    These things can be overcome, but it is a big deal.

    As a minister I have had couples come to me wanting to be married that were sexually active with one another already. My advice to them has always been STOP NOW. Remain celibate until your marriage day. This can be made a fast unto the Lord (I Cor 7:5) and a demonstration of your ability to remain faithful in marriage.
     
  10. Rachel

    Rachel New Member

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    Tentmaker, that was perfectly said!

    Rachel
     
  11. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Wonderful response Tentmaker!
     
  12. Dr. Bob

    Dr. Bob Administrator
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    Fornication has always carried a broad concept of any "sexual" sin when used in a literal sense. Greek "pornea".

    Oddly, many do not know that "pornea" (fornication) was used figuratively to refer to idolatry! Chasing after other gods (whose lustfilled orgies and practices were part of the fertility rites).

    It is so bad - whether the sexual acts or worse, the sexual acts motivated by false religion - that the Jerusalem Council of early church leaders and members said,
    Pretty clear teaching on what the church (and God's inspired Word) says about such casual sexual activity.

    It's not good for a man to touch a woman.
     
  13. GODzThunder

    GODzThunder New Member

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    all in all, if it is not your wife you are having sexual relations with, it is adultery. If you are not married then the person you are having relations with is not your wife... That is fornication, that is adultery.
     
  14. Johnv

    Johnv New Member

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    A more clear way to say this is this:

    If you're not married, and having sex, you're committing fornication. If you're married and having sex with someone who's not your spouse, or if you're having sex with someone else's spouse, you're committing adultery. Fornication is sex outside of marriage. Adultery is fornication when one or both of the partners is married.
     
  15. Aki

    Aki Member

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    very well said, Tentmaker [​IMG]

    thanks :D
     
  16. North Carolina Tentmaker

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    Thanks guys (and gals) a little support goes a long way.
     
  17. manchester

    manchester New Member

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    Notice that the apostle Paul said that if single people cannot control their sexual desires then they should get married:

    "Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." (1 Corinthians 7:8-9)

    This passage says that if unmarried people are not able to be celibate (as Paul was) and they find themselves burning with sexual desire, then they should get married so that they don't commit sexual sins. The implication is that sex is only valid within marriage, as the following passage also indicates:

    "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman [or, "It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman," according to the NIV footnote]. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." (1 Corinthians 7:1-2, KJV)
     
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