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Shock and awe

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by thisnumbersdisconnected, Jan 16, 2014.

  1. thisnumbersdisconnected

    Apr 11, 2013
    Likes Received:
    I was shocked, confused, bewildered
    As I entered Heaven's door
    Not by the beauty of it all
    By the lights or its decor.

    But it was the folks in Heaven
    Who made me sputter and gasp
    The thieves, the liars, the sinners
    The alcoholics, the trash.

    There stood the kid from seventh grade
    Who swiped my lunch money twice
    Next to him was my old neighbor
    Who never said anything nice.

    Uncle Bill, who I always thought
    Was rotting away in hell
    Was sitting pretty on cloud nine
    Looking incredibly well.

    I nudged Jesus, "What's the deal?
    I would love to hear Your take
    How'd all these sinners get up here?
    God must have made a mistake."

    "And why is everyone so quiet
    So somber? Please give me a clue."
    "Hush, child," said He. "They're all in shock.
    No one thought they'd see you!"​