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spin-off "forced to serve" thread

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by abcgrad94, Sep 1, 2012.

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  1. abcgrad94

    abcgrad94 Active Member

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    Say you have a church member with a teen child with severe physical and mental challenges. The parent never works Sunday School, Jr. Church, Awana, or nursery, or any other children's ministry in the church. When asked, the parent truthfully answers that she is caregiver for said child 24/7 and church is the only "break" she gets from the child.

    The child is on a toddler level and is very loud and disruptive no matter what age group he is with, and some of the other very young children are alarmed by his wheelchair and deformities, not to mention the loud, strange noises. None of the teachers can take care of his special needs and still manage a class of kids. They resent the mother for not "pulling her share" in the children's ministries.

    Would you make the mother serve in children's ministry as "payment" for using those ministries as a daycare for her child? Should the church require a worker to make a special needs class just for this kid, so the mother can be spiritually fed? What would your church do?
     
    #1 abcgrad94, Sep 1, 2012
  2. Oldtimer

    Oldtimer New Member

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    Have those who resent the mother for not "pulling her share" done anything to minister to this woman's needs during the rest of her 24/7? Has the church, as a whole, done anything either?

    Serve in the children's ministry as "payment"? Since when did anyone have to pay any physical thing to worship our Lord?

    Can't help but wonder what effort it took for this woman just to come to church. How many others with teenaged children have to do what she must do in order for both of them to come to Sunday services? And someone(s) is being critical of her because she's "not pulling her share".

    Think about it for a moment................

    I beleive that our church would do whatever is necessary to accomodate the special needs of both this woman and her child. To give her the ability to come to worship our Lord WITHOUT any sense of guilt that she may be imposing on someone else for 2 hours.

    I pray that those who resent this woman never have to walk in her shoes the remaining 166 hours a week.
     
    #2 Oldtimer, Sep 1, 2012
  3. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

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    What Old Timer said. I feel about the same in this situation as the other. There is no room for exclusion in a Christian setting.
     
    #3 saturneptune, Sep 2, 2012
  4. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    Really? I shake my head at those who "resent".

    I have worked in children's ministries since I was young, and I am getting close to being an old fart now.

    I have never bore no children out of these grand hips, and if resentment were a tactic, then by golly, I have reason to be resentful. I have worked all these years in children's work, and no one has returned the--favor is it???

    These resenters need to get a life.
     
    #4 SaggyWoman, Sep 2, 2012
  5. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

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    The whole concept, especially in the first thread, is about the worst I have seen on this board. It shows a total lack of understanding of a New Testement church, and why we are here, to serve the Lord and each other. It is bad enough for lay people not to grasp this, but those who lead a church??? I could not make this stuff up.
     
    #5 saturneptune, Sep 2, 2012
  6. abcgrad94

    abcgrad94 Active Member

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    The scenario I presented in the OP is one that actually happened many years ago in a church I know of. In light of the recent thread about church members being required to serve in children's ministries, I wanted to know how a situation like this would be handled in such a church. So far none of those in favor of the requirement (on the other thread) have responded to this one.

    By the way, a nursery worker took this disabled child to the church library and kept the child occupied during church, so the other classes would not be disturbed and the mother could have a break. The woman who did this had a true heart for service and was not "required" or "forced" to do so.
     
    #6 abcgrad94, Sep 2, 2012
  7. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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    I would expect the mother to keep the child at home, or if he is brought to church, bring the care he needs and not impose upon those unequipped to deal with the situation.
     
    #7 Aaron, Sep 3, 2012
  8. HankD

    HankD Well-Known Member
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    Maybe this has already been mentioned...

    The fact that adults bring the children under their charge to church does not guarantee that they are worthy parents or that they have "values" we would want in babysitters of our own children.

    HankD
     
    #8 HankD, Sep 3, 2012
  9. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    I would say, in this day and age,that workers (even if a few) should access training. Many teachers in some churches are trained in their fields and possibly can work with special needs children.
     
    #9 SaggyWoman, Sep 3, 2012
  10. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    The mother needs to be at church and needs a break so the church should definitely step up to help at church and also at home with some respite care. Additionally, the child needs someone experienced with caring for a child like this and it might mean hiring someone for that time at church to help. It is good for the other children to learn to be around a child like that as well so I would allow a class to stray from the curriculum in order to address his differences and how he is the same as the other kids. Most likely the fear is from never having been around a child like this. My kids are around it a lot due to our large ministry to the disabled and so it doesn't bother them at all!
     
    #10 annsni, Sep 3, 2012
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