Terminal Illness and Suicide

Deacon · Oct 10, 2014

Many of us have already read about the decision of a young woman in Oregon who has decided to end her life on November 1st. [LINK]
It's a truly heart breaking story that's being used to promote the “death with dignity” assisted suicide agenda.

Less known is a story of another woman suffering with terminal brain cancer who has chosen to take another path.

Brain Cancer Will Likely Kill Me, But There’s No Way I’ll Kill Myself [LINK]

The Hardest Part Is Not Knowing When

Now I face my own prognosis of future suffering. Some days are joyful. Some days the diagnosis feels like a huge weight in my backpack.

The hardest part of a terminal diagnosis is not knowing the timeline. I speak candidly with my physicians and pray that they can keep my tumor under control with the latest therapies to extend my life, one more year, month, day. Someday, I hope my tumor qualifies to be studied in one of the many clinical trials for brain cancer. I’d like to think my situation was part of a cure for someone else.

My doctors have applauded my decision to step down from my physically and emotionally demanding job to spend precious time with my family. I have a husband and three daughters who I hope will always remember me as a strong, thoughtful (but bull-headed) woman, carrying Christ’s mercy and compassion for others in my soul with rich joy and meaning.

[snip]

Dignity Lies in Love

But there isn’t any dignity in cancer or other debilitating illness. In my own treatment, I’ve been poked, prodded, radiated, chemotherapied, and cut open so many times that I stopped worrying about being dignified quite some time ago. Instead, I prefer to get my dignity by appreciating the dear people who care for me with their individual expressions of love and prayers on my behalf.

Death Is Always Out of Our Hands

When I was a young mother, my father had a traumatic accident that severed his spinal cord and left him paralyzed from the neck down. The last five months of my father’s life, which he lived as a paraplegic, were filled with utter helplessness. He wasn’t productive in any meaningful way. He couldn’t even shave his own face. Would Emanuel or Maynard find my dad’s life useless? I didn’t. My siblings and I soaked up our father’s presence, realizing that caring for the needy person we loved so dearly showed each of us some unexpected things about ourselves. As writer Cheryl Magness says, caregivers get a chance to grow in compassion, responsibility, and selflessness as they care for those in need.

This will serve me now as I face my own debilitating mortality. Death sucks. And while this leads many to attempt to calm their fears by grasping for personal control over the situation, as a Christian with a Savior who loves me dearly and who has redeemed me from a dying world, I have a higher calling. God wants me to be comfortable in my dependence on Him and others, to live with Him in peace and comfort no matter what comes my way. As for my cancer journey, circumstances out of my control are not the worst thing that can happen to me. The worst thing would be losing faith, refusing to trust in God’s purpose in my life and trying to grab that control myself.
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For me, it's a matter of trust and control - I trust a God who controls all things to control the manner of my death.

I'm very familiar with death and seen people in horrible circumstances.

I believe treatment and medical decision-making are personal choices made with the patient, the medical personal and the family.

But I could never take part in an assisted suicide and find the idea abhorrent - antithetical to the trust I place in God.

Rob

padredurand · Oct 10, 2014

Thank you, Deacon, for the story and your testimony. Encouraging words for those facing an uncertain earthly future while holding fast to the One who holds eternity in His hands.

Terminal Illness and Suicide

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