Calvinism/Arminianism Humour

Jokes about people of a certain hair color are not allowed because one of the moderators has daughters who are offended by those jokes. :rolleyes:

 

rofl I've heard it all now. The words *up*, and *lighten*, spring to mind.

 

How many Calvinists does it take to change a lightbulb.

God predestined the light bulb to go out, nothing you can do about it, don't even try.

 

:confused: I don't get it. Every major missions movement or revival in the past 500 years has been coupled with Calvinistic doctrine. Could you explain the joke? </font>[/QUOTE]Have you ever heard of Billy Graham and his Descision magazine?

How about D.L. Moody? Billy Sunday?

Didn't think so.

 

Billy Idol?

 

How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?

No one knows. They all say "God can change His own elect light bulbs whenever He pleases."

 

Should a Calvinist change an Arminian's lightbulb?

Don't bother they haven't noticed how dark it is. :cool:

johnp.

 

Great Calvinist Cartoon

see it at:
http://www.comics.com/comics/pearls/archive/pearls-20050402.html

Crocs:
Hello, zeeba neighba…
Tooday we feel God love by holding hand and singing “Kumbaya” wid our zeeba brudders… Peese join wid us and feel God love …

Zebra:
Why is there a half-eaten zebra leg laying next to your barbecue?

Crocs:
… God no love him.

 

LOL

 

:confused: I don't get it. Every major missions movement or revival in the past 500 years has been coupled with Calvinistic doctrine. Could you explain the joke? </font>[/QUOTE]Have you ever heard of Billy Graham and his Descision magazine?

How about D.L. Moody? Billy Sunday?

Didn't think so. </font>[/QUOTE]DL moody was a calvinist. Billy Sunday had great revivals, but didn't single-handedly revive America. Billy Graham's revivals have produced much bad fruit as well as good. Arminian revivals tend to produce many many converts- and then most of them don't stick or they just wash up. 'Easy believism.' We should pray for the strong Calvinistic revivals of days gone by.

 

I assume by the smiley face that you are joking about Moody being a "Calvinist."

For all those interested in his theology, they should read the definitive work on the issue by Stan Gundry entitled "Love Them In?"

Gundry's work shows that Moody's theology was all over the board. His most ardent critics were Universalists on one side (very popular then, almost non-existent today) and (hyper)Calvinists on the other. He got along with all the moderates in between, including his best bud, Chuck Spurgeon.

As Gundry points out, Moody said things distinctly "Arminian" in one sermon and things distinctly "Calvinistic" in the next. But according to all the bios I have read of him, he never avowed either system. Gundry illustrates that he was unsystematic about almost all his theology, including eschatology.

Of course, being unsystematic is no fault in my eyes. I think that Moody was the greatest evangelist since Paul.