I had 3 women who influenced our decision.... wife, my mom and my Mother in law. All 3 were adamant that my son should be infant baptized. I always felt that if the Holy Spirit wanted my son, at any age, that he could go for the dunking immersion method, so keep the peace and you become your child’s mentor. If the HS taps him for dunking, let him do it again
I don't know the true answer. I know that I believe no matter what once/if my son accepts christ as his saviour then he will need to be baptised. Whether or not he is baptised as a baby.
The problem is I can't tell my wife that because she never had a second baptism. So she won't appreciate me telling her that she needs to be baptised too.
I don't know if I believe it will be damaging to my son or that god will punish me for having him baptised now.
I personally do not believe God will punish you for doing something with pure intentions. But I also could not apply water to a baby and call it baptism. I struggled with this issue for a long time, when I was trying to fit into various paedobaptist churches.
My brothers and I were all sprinkled as infants (in a Methodist church) and it was labeled as baptism.
Christ saved me at age 24 but for 10 years we went to mainline protestant churches and believer's baptism was never taught,
At age 34 we began attending an IFB church (B for Bible but it was thoroughly baptistic in doctrine/practice) and when they had a baptism the following summer my wife and I obeyed, and were baptized in the St. John River where it's the border between the US and Canada.
(Small church had no baptistery and outdoor baptisms would be a challenge there.)
No body appreciates being told they are wrong about something.
The truth of the matter is your wife does need to be biblically baptized. Her infant baptism didn’t count.
If I could just be frank, the Bible says “quit ye like men”, stand up for the truth and follow God, not your wife’s possible emotional responses. I’m not saying to be a jerk to your wife, but I am saying you have to stand for what’s right. Infant baptism is not right, and by allowing your son to be baptized you are giving approval to a unbiblical and honestly a heretical practice.
Who is in charge of your life God and his word, or your wife and her emotions?
There is a reason why our Baptist forefathers were martyred, and tortured over believers baptism, there were many Baptists who were persecuted for refusing to have their children baptized. You would do well to consider their example.
I am a young man I don't know everything yet. When I was a teenager I was exposed to lots of false doctrine and now I am trying to work through everything. I am trying to work out the best thing to do for my wife and child.
I apologize if i do not come across as gentle or helpful (i'm still working on my communication skills through typing). And i do commend you for wanting to do the right thing. I do implore you to seek the Lord together with your wife. It's imperative that you lead your family according to the Will of God in Christ.
I'm going to try and serve up some fairly bite-sized pieces of thought. Those of the Baptistic persuasion (that includes many of folks in the Bible Church movement):
look baptism as an ordinance, not a sacrament.
IOW, it is a step of obedience, not a way of obtaining more grace.
consider it as an outward sign of an inward change.
do not consider it a replacement for Old Testament circumcision. IOW, it does not establish a covenant relationship.
We moved from the USA to England and there aren't any Southern Baptist churches around us. I don't like the Strict Baptist or London Baptist churches. My wife likes to go to the Methodist church with her family but I don't like that church. So I go to a pentecostal church but I don't want to be a member there or at the Methodist church.