It never ceases to amaze me at the stupidity of some when it comes to spanking a child. Thank goodness some courts still have some sense. But with the direction we are headed in this country it won't last long. God help us when the dem's are in control of all branches of government. Spanking bans will be the least of our worries.
I am a spanker - canoe paddle with handle sawed off - 36 seems excessive - I normally give one or 2 licks, at the most, and VERY rarely. 11 and 13 year old - boy and girl. I have found consistancy, discussion and reasonableness very effective.
We walk through the series of events that brought us to the spanking and what we could have done to avoid it.
I agree that 36 hits with anything goes beyond spanking to abuse. My dad's discipline was a severe beating across the back of the legs that left me barely able to hobble to my bedroom to cry my eyes out.
And that, I consider reasonable....The "rod" or hand, which stands for "the price to be paid" is the final result of disobedience or rebellion.
But if that response is not on the table, what price is to be paid?
We have 2 daughters, that I can't ever remember spanking,
but they knew, by watching our responses to rebellion or disobedience, in their siblings, that justice would involve pain.....
Understand that the initial Scriptures listed is from Proverbs - wisdom words for us.
There are no directions but a general idea - that spanking is an effective form of discipline and approved by God.
The Scriptures listed above is part of the law that was given to the Israelites.
Since we are not under the law, we are not to follow the civil law that was established for the Jews.
Personally, I think 36 swats with an object on a 12 year old IS abuse.
There is no reason to spank a child that much AND by 12 years old, there should pretty much be no reason to spank if the parents had done the proper job to begin with.
I don't spank my babies as some "Christian parenting experts" say to (and I seriously use that term loosely), but I do spank my children from about toddlerhood to whenever it is no longer needed.
My little ones are now 5 and 7 and spankings are extremely rare because I know that they are big enough to understand consequences now and we've laid a foundation where they know what is right and wrong and usually choose wisely.
I don't think the ONLY reason we have rebellious teenagers (someone mentioned this) is because of a lack of discipline, although I do think it's a large part of it.
I see rebellious teenagers because of parents who have been so hands-off with their children through their entire lives.
These are kids who don't have the love, support and nurturing from their parents for whatever reason (broken homes is a big one - mom needs to work and is exhausted when she gets home and so cannot "feed" into her kids like she should), and so they just don't have that connection that is so important as a teen.
So spanking is only one part of the discipline equation IMO.
Discipleship is as important - or even MORE important than spanking and I do feel it's possible to raise a child in the nurture and admonition of the Lord without spanking but not without discipleship.