Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I believe a certain amount of decency (respect) needs to be shown when in the house of the Lord.
I go to a small Baptist church, with less than 50 members. Constantly, people show up late. I can see once in a while, but many people show up 15 to 20 minutes late into the service- and it's usually the same people. Then, it never fails. Some people get up constantly to get a drink, go to the bathroom, whisper back and forth, grab a refill on coffee or another donut, and one guy even has a bad habit of belching.
The pastor, who has spoke up about these issues, seems to be ignored. I have spoken to some of these people myself, and I get a bunch of excuses, yet it keeps happening.
I'm not very eloquent with my words. I don't know what to say to these people, even after they've been told. This type of behavior gets my blood pressure up, and sometimes I have to pray to get my focus back on the sermon. Is it me? Or has anyone else had experience with this?
~ Brother Brad
Unacceptable behavior in church.
Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Brad the Baptist, May 19, 2017.
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Brad the Baptist New MemberSite Supporter
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First of all - NO beverage or food in the Sanctuary -
Second - the Ushers should sit any late comers.
Third - are some of the "guilty" also church leaders
A- if they are - that's another problem
B- if they are not - then church leaders should be backing up the pastor. -
I had a pastor friend who took a church with similar problems. One Sunday he announced that starting next week there would be no coffee, no donuts, and the doors would be locked at exactly 11AM (starting time).
The worst offenders apparently didn't believe him. When they arrived they discovered they were locked out.
About half of them got mad and left the church. When I asked him about it he said, "Even the body of Christ needs a bowel movement now and then!"
Since then the church has tripled in Sunday morning attendance. :) -
Oh my gosh TCassidy!! That is hysterical!!
I do think that ushers can help in this situation. Latecomers can only enter the sanctuary at certain times. You want to go to the bathroom? You need to wait for the appropriate time to re-enter the sanctuary.
I do think it is really rude to do most of these things. A bathroom run for some people is necessary medically and I get that but the vast majority of people can sit the hour and 15 minutes or however long the service is. Heck, *I* have to do it because I run the computer and there have been times I could have used a potty run but I didn't go because I need to stay so I did. But it is really ought to start the service with 8 people in the room and most of them be the people on the worship team. It gets frustrating to us as the pastor/staff because we make sure that everything is ready on time and yet others don't have that same courtesy. -
Brad the Baptist New MemberSite Supporter
I was thinking that I'm the only one with a problem. The pastor has spoken about this before, being an usher- it's my duty (for lack of a better word) to back him up. I understand people need to go to the bathroom. I also understand people might need to get a drink of water. BUT... it's the same few people time and time again. The guy who burps during church service and Bible study consistently gets up to get a drink and go to the bathroom. I'm not a delicate person. I'm what most people call an "in your face" kinda of guy. I'm more inclined to remove the burper from church before removing his beverage.
The people who arrive to church late are the same ones over and over again. They have jobs. I'm wondering what would happen if they consistently showed up to work 20 minutes late?
Thanks for the input. I will talk to my pastor and ask him what the best way is for me to back him up. Like i said, I'm not very eloquent and could use a few pointers on what to say and how to say it.
~Bro. Brad -
tyndale1946 Well-Known MemberSite Supporter
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Brad the Baptist New MemberSite Supporter
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tyndale1946 Well-Known MemberSite Supporter
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We used to serve coffee and snacks in the back corner of the meeting room so food in the service isn't a problem.
And it's true, about a third of the congregation comes in late, same ones every Sunday.
But as long as we're griping...
Why does someone sitting in the front row always have to get up and go to the bathroom during the service?Rob
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tyndale1946 Well-Known MemberSite Supporter
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Our church used to have notices up saying "No beverages allowed in the sanctuary," and I think it was just presumed that food was not allowed. But recently I have seen people with cups of coffee, maybe other drinks, and I don't see those notices any more. So apparently that is now allowed, though I was never given the 'official' word. This aspect of the problems herein mentioned, as well as the others, seems to come down to the question of how much catering to the persons should a church do just to keep them there.It's perhaps comparable to how much grandparents will let the grandkids get away with that they never did allow their children, the kids' parents.
Anyway, I still do not drink coffee in the church service, though I've always been a noted consumer thereof n Bible classes-- Life Groups, they are now called. We did have a change in how the coffee is distributed some months ago. It used to be that those who prepared the coffee poured it into 'coffee butlers' that anyone could come and take to the different classrooms. That was convenient, but it was announced that we are wasting __ gallons (not sure they gave a number) every week, so now we have big coffeemakers set in various places in which those who want a cup have to come and get it. I'm sure we are wasting less that way, but for those of us who have trouble getting around, it can be a lot to go through to get that one cup. I have to change buildings and cross a parking area and then walk 40 yards.And I probably would not consider this much except that it may be another example of how we're led to expect the church to be convenient for us, and to note I'm also affected.
I'm sure few would argue that a church service today is much less of a 'dignified' procedure than it was decades ago. Nobody ever clapped in church when I was a kid, for example. And if a few kids sitting together were whispering or passing things to each other, one or more nearby adults would move to sit between or among them. For that matter, other ceremonies, like graduations or music recitals, had an accepted line of dignity, and persons involved did not have their own "cheering sections" to yell for them when their name was announced or they performed. "Give an inch and they'll take a mile" might have been the thought about compromising solemnity and affirming the individual rather than the purpose of the gathering. -
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Brad the Baptist New MemberSite Supporter
The problem might be me. ;) During worship, people are texting on their phones, coming in late, and talking loud enough to communicate over the worship songs. I don't sing too well, but when I worship, it's to the Lord Jesus. The songs, the lyrics, refresh my memory of all that the Lord has done for me, and how grateful and blessed I am. Fifteen to twenty minutes into it, when someone walks in late, they feel the need to talk about the weather, Trump, Hillary, the FBI, global warning, Russia, how fresh the donuts are, their aching back, how they didn't sleep, parking problems, and just about everything else EXCEPT singing. Then, as if that's not enough, along comes a BUUUUUURPP by the 20 something year old and newlywed brother who needs to get up 3 to 4 times for more beverages.
Maybe I should make an appointment with my doctor and get a prescription for Ritalin. I might have attention deficit disorder.:Geek
Maybe I should make an appointment with a psychiatrist and get a prescription for anti-anxiety pills so this stuff won't bother me??:confused: -
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Now here is a great question for the pastors here!
Is it possible to come up with a Sunday message about courtesy in church ( no food, not being late, no texting, ect) if so - what would be the Three points (and sub-points) and what Scripture would you use? -
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A relation can be made with excellent sermon I remember, "God is Serious About His Church." This was based on the Ananias and Sapphira incident, in which they falsely claimed the land they sold was for a lower price and held back some of the proceeds.I've always thought the point of why they both suddenly fell dead when confronted with the truth was because the church was in infancy, and an infection is deadly to an infant and must be eradicated. So God does not always end peoples' lives for treating the church casually, or with 'just a little' incongruity, but don't discount the seriousness of the offense, which you may still be called on to the carpet for. -
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tyndale1946 Well-Known MemberSite Supporter
Ephesians 6:13 Wherefore take unto you the whole Armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
6:14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
6:15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
6:16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
6:17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: -
However...focusing on others' behavior during church isn't really what the Lord expects. I can tell you who wants that kind of behavior and getting your blood pressure up though...(hint, It isn't Jesus). You're letting something that really isn't your issue to deal with steal your focus from the Lord and the teaching of His word. Even if folks come in late, give glory to God that at least they came. So what if they get up to get a drink of water, at least they came. So what if the guy burps, he came to church. So what if they're whispering back and forth, they came! What they do in church is between them and the Lord. Focusing on what others are doing or not doing is not helping YOU at all. Focus on YOU. Focus on quieting your heart and your mind to listen to what the Lord is trying to teach you through your pastor's sermon. Follow along in your bible, take notes. Keep your focus on two people...the Lord and you. Honestly, although I sing in our church choir, I couldn't tell you what most folks are doing during the time we're up singing. My focus is on our choir director, listening to the music and those singing around me, and most of all the Lord. When I slip out for Sunday School, I slip out quietly and don't make a production of it. When I come down off the choir platform and stay for the service, once again, I can't tell you what's going on around me. I'm listening, reading, taking notes. I don't have the time to watch others if I'm going to watch me.
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