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Iowa Boss Fires Worker For Being "Too Attractive"

Discussion in 'News & Current Events' started by General Mung Beans, Dec 28, 2012.

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  1. General Mung Beans

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    http://bigstory.ap.org/article/iowa-court-bosses-can-fire-irresistible-workers

    I suppose this is technically legal but on a moral level it is quite unfair and absurd Mrs. Nelson was fired because of the uncontrollable lust of her boss.
     
  2. Oldtimer

    Oldtimer New Member

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    Unfair because he had the means to resist temptation and used it rather than yielding to it?
     
  3. Baptist Believer

    Baptist Believer Well-Known Member
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    He had the means to resist temptation, but he instead chose to blame the object of his lust.

    It's not an easy situation, but she should not simply be fired because the boss can't keep his eyes to himself or maintain proper boundaries.

    I work with a number of very attractive women, but my heart is for my wife. Furthermore, because I respect women, I tend not to objectify them - especially the ones I know personally.

    I'm not perfect in this regard, but avoiding lust is really not as difficult as it is assumed. You just have to want to avoid lust. If that is your intent, you will receive assistance from God to avoid it.
     
  4. Gina B

    Gina B Active Member

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    Good for him. He recognized his weakness, so did his wife, and too bad for the lady who got fired. An employee should be allowed to hire and let go of whomever he/she chooses for whatever reason. Stinks to get hired by someone who WOULD do that, but that's life.

    The man found her attractive and worked with her for hours a day, days a week...he did the right thing.

    If I developed a liking for anyone I worked with that close, I'd quit.

    If my husband developed a liking for anyone he worked with that close, I'd .... well, be one unhappy wife as long as it continued.

    But it happens. Why blame him for being a human? Sometimes you're attracted to someone and it's totally unexpected.

    I'd love to get fired for being too attractive and given a month off without pay and a great reference.

    I just don't get why it doesn't happen to ME. :laugh: Doesn't my great personality shine through in a most alluring manner and cover up all these physical flaws?! ROFL
     
  5. SovereignMercy

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    Sounds like he needs to retire from dentistry. I wouldn't want my wife or daughter to be his patient.
     
  6. Winman

    Winman Active Member

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    A thread like this is useless without pics. :tongue3:
     
  7. Earth Wind and Fire

    Earth Wind and Fire Well-Known Member
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    Now you & I are on the same page......probably with every man who read it! :laugh:
     
  8. mont974x4

    mont974x4 New Member

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    Was she ugly when he hired her?

    I would suspect he hired her knowing full well how attractive she is, and then had to fire her when his wife found out.

    He probably should not have hired her to begin with. Since he did then the only way he could honor his bride, his marriage, and yes even honor the secretary was to fire her.





    If the sin involved was different we wouldn't be having this discussion.

    A man who struggles with alcoholism would be praised for dumping out the booze he bought in a moment of weakness.

    A man who struggle with porn would be praised for burning the magazines (or deleting the files and installing accountability software) after buying the porn in a moment of weakness.

    A man who flushed his drugs he bought in a moment of weakness would be praised.
     
  9. carpro

    carpro Well-Known Member
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    It took him 10 years to notice she was attractive?

    Sounds like he's the one with the problem and he made her pay for it.
     
  10. Baptist Believer

    Baptist Believer Well-Known Member
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    But alcohol, pornography and drugs are not people. They are objects. This man object-ified this woman to lust after her. I find all sorts of women attractive, but that doesn't mean that I lust after them or cross appropriate boundaries. This man didn't fix anything by firing this woman because the problem is inside him. He is responsible for his thoughts and behavior. If we are simply dealing with objects, then sure, get rid of them. If we are dealing with people, there is no excuse to penalize someone else for our own unwillingness to restrain ourselves from sin.
     
  11. Baptist Believer

    Baptist Believer Well-Known Member
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    Yep. Jesus taught that when we find ourselves lusting, we shouldn't make excuses but instead need to take serious action WITH OURSELVES, not with other people (Matthew 5:29-20). If lust is a matter of the eye (a classic excuse - the one used here) or the hand ("I couldn't help myself"), then we need to cut those off.

    Instead, we have people in this thread who would rather blame the woman who has been the subject of this man's lust and have her lose her livelihood.

    Of course, we could always insist that women wear burkas - that would solve the sin problem since lust is not a matter of a man's heart, it is the fault of the woman, right? :tonofbricks:
     
  12. Jerome

    Jerome Well-Known Member
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    http://www.iowacourts.gov/Supreme_Court/Recent_Opinions/20121221/11-1857.pdf

     
  13. mont974x4

    mont974x4 New Member

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    I don't believe she was being punished. I believe she was being protected.

    Did this fix his sin problem? No. It does protect him, as he flees this one woman who was a temptation to him. Since his bride and pastor are involved it seems to me he is also working to deal with the root problem. He is being held accountable and being responsible.

    Many men are in this same situation. What is a key aspect these men should encounter from anyone who counsels them? It is a demand to break off any relationship he has with the other woman. Sadly, in this case, it involved an employee. That made the situation more complicated, but the answer is still the same simple wisdom.
     
  14. abcgrad94

    abcgrad94 Active Member

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    This man has a problem, and getting rid of the employee is not going to solve that problem because it will come up again later with someone else.

    I think he could have handled the situation much differently than he did. First, he thought the woman's clothing was too revealing/tight/whatever. He could have given his employees a dress code or had them wear scrubs as uniforms.

    He also thought her behavior was inappropriate. If that was the case, he should have confronted her and told her so. As her employer, he SHOULD have done this. It's his job to set boundaries in writing when he hires someone.

    His behavior to her was also inappropriate. She should have confronted HIM or threatened to sue him for harassment. She didn't. Both parties are at fault there.
     
  15. Salty

    Salty 20,000 Posts Club
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    I have several thoughts here.

    1) I do agree with Gina- an employer should be allowed to hire and let go of whomever he chooses for whatever reason. Stinks to get hired by someone who WOULD do that, but that's life. - Suppose the assistant quit without notice because she found the Dr too good looking - We never would have heard about it.

    2) Its not her fault she is so good looking.... suppose she enjoyed having a beer once a day - and brought it to the office - same thing with any other addiction

    3) "You just have to want to avoid lust. If that is your intent, you will receive assistance from God to avoid it."

    If that was the case Christians would have no sin problems - but the Devils main job is to work on our weakness.
    Remember that saying - every man has his price

    4) The case did go to court - so evidently she did try to sue him. But she lost

    5) It took him 10 years? Do we know all the details - was he married at the time, do we know what he thoughts were, did......

    6) With all the publicity - I wonder how many job offers she has received? Hmmmmmmmmm
     
  16. kyredneck

    kyredneck Well-Known Member
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    When my middle daughter lived in Lexington and walked her dog at night, not only did she 'carry', she wore 'rape prevention' clothes. Believe me, she could look like a bag lady (I think she got a kick out of it).

    Indications are she was asked to dress down, but at the same time he was the boss and could have implemented a dress code, perhaps he lacked the will or the guts to do it, maybe he thought it was good for business in the long run; bottom line I think the wife caught him (them?).

    I'm not taking sides, to me this is just plain old hard facts of reality, attraction between the sexes is a powerful force. I've heard it taught that the concept of 'flee from fornication' can be derived throughout the scriptures at least 200 times.

    Then again maybe the woman's place is at home after all...... :smilewinkgrin:
     
  17. Aaron

    Aaron Member
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  18. Salty

    Salty 20,000 Posts Club
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    I would like to hear what MR. Nelson has to say about this.
     
  19. Jerome

    Jerome Well-Known Member
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    Dental assistant interviewed:

    http://www.cnn.com/2012/12/22/us/iowa-irresistible-worker/index.html


    Here's Dr. and Mrs. Jim Knight:

    https://www.facebook.com/jeanne.knight.505



    Dr. and Mrs. Knight's 'Senior Pastor' and their 'Other Pastor':

    http://www.fdevfree.com/#/about-us/our-staff

     
  20. Salty

    Salty 20,000 Posts Club
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    from the link:

    She was not fired because of her gender, the court decided, but because her boss and his wife felt Nelson was a threat to their marriage.

    (bold my emphasis) on one hand its good to see the court places value on marriage
     
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